Is it proper for my grandsons to open my refrigerator at will?

@maxdancona,

This is not about being 'right'. It's about respecting other people's space and belongings. You probably taught your children not to touch or take what wasn't theirs. That's what I'm talking about.

Let's say this wasn't about family members, where it may be more acceptable. Your kid is at a friend's house. Would you tell them it's okay to go into their fridge or cupboards? Of course not. It's not done.

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@maxdancona,

And judgemental is bad, how?

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wow. this thread is bizarre, it is very clear that the main problem is the son who refuses to support his mom's right to impose reasonable rules with the grandkids. this woman finds it difficult to properly grandparent in all likelihood because she did not properly parent. It is a bit late to fret about the cost of failure to do it right, but to impose rules this late in the game will not go over well for sure.

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@Lordyaswas,

Lordyaswas wrote:

My maternal Grandma (nan) worked in a cotton mill as a girl, and had muscles on her arms like a docker.
I would guestimate that she gave me a good doughboy (clip round the ear) at least twenty or so times over the course of my childhood, and I quickly learned what was, and what was not acceptable behaviour.
I don't think any less of her because of her disciplining me, in actual fact I look back on that with great fondness, and my siblings and I often laugh at what our grandparents used to do in order to keep discipline.
Don't get me wrong, there were many, many laughs as well...

Ah, Grandma! The thing I most remember about her is the love. That and the beatings. But mostly the love.

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@Mame,

Thank you Mame. I was a little taken aback by maxdancona's reply because being judgmental wasn't my intentional at all. Sorry that people misinterpret stuff so easily. You are so right in your reply. My reply was only for the grandmom and yes if it's my home I would absolutely want to be asked before something is being touched by an outsider.

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@scarlet01,

so for you kin are outsiders.....MKay.

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@godfreygirl143,

Do you think you could put a lock on the refrigerator? Also, lock your bedroom before they come over? I think I'd start with that, and if anyone asked or complained, that would be a way to get the conversation started. Just a suggestion.

By the way, I agree with the others that this is a parenting problem. I would never have thought of acting like that in my grandmother's house.

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@FBM,

I used to have to ask my grandmother's butler to open her fridge, as I wasn't allowed down the stairs that led to the staff quarters.

He used to run back up and describe what was in there, and I'd then place my order.

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@Lordyaswas,

I can only guess at the trauma you must have endured.

http://i206.photobucket.com/albums/bb192/DinahFyre/consoling2.gif

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@FBM,

Tell me about it.

The butler was at least seventy, and took ages!

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@Lordyaswas,

Well, you seem to have emerged relatively unscathed. A testament to the human spirit, it is.

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explain to the children very smartly that very nice. Their parents get a huge responsible to take their home. Life is just short we achive very modern things. Grandfather grandmother advise us to use real thing. refrigeretor is almost new thing in our modern life . so take it and enjoy your life.

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Is it proper for my grandsons to open my refrigerator at will?

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