Oz Election Thread #5 - Rudd's Labor (redux)

Hmmm. Not so blatant hypocrisy!

http://www.theage.com.au/federal-politics/federal-election-2013/refugee-candidate-says-stop-the-boats-20130808-2rkib.html

Apparently John's family's boat only went from Vietnam to Malaysia - the UNHCR resettled them in Australia 9 months later. By plane.

I feel a debate topic forming.

Well, I guess it'd be worse if he'd said stop the planes, then?

I just got warren entsch's blurb in the mail, looks exactly the same as John Nguyen 's. point 5 is zactly the same . Tempted to vote for a bob Katter like figure just as a rejection of pro forma election material.

We live in the remote wilds, can't we have some individuality?

We made the daily show!

A big night on Wednesdays on ABC Gruen Nation, The Hamster Decides and the last ep of Wednesday Night Fever (all three have an election focus)

Significant for me was the appearances of Bob Katter and Clive Palmer in Hamster and WNF - mercilessly taking the piss out of themselves. It was actually hard not to like them - Palmer in particular (wish I could find it on youtube, maybe later)



Take that, mother fingers!

Tony Abbott has been having a bit of a gaffelanche lately.

In front of an audience he indicated he wasn't 'the suppository of all knowledge'.

Referred to his party's female candidate in an electorate as having 'sex appeal' (as opposed to having a firm handle on policy and a dedication to serving her community, sigh)

Said he wouldn't support marriage equality legislation because it was a 'fashion of the moment'.



And this gets to the crux of what the latest Gruen Nation identified as the opposing strategies of the main camps.

ALP/Rudd want it to be about 'personality' who do you like more, Rudd or Abbott. LNP want Abbott out of the picture completely (or as much as possible) - their first ad is 'lubing us up for later negativity' doesn't mention Abbott until the last few seconds. They will focus relentlessly on the govt's 'failings' - rather than their own solutions.

WNF had a pretty hilarious segment where faux leaders relentlessly bagged their own parties and themselves as they fought for 'underdog' status.

13 News Corp headlines - translated
ByNick Feik
Wednesday, 14th August 2013
Source

Ever wondered what News Corp editors are thinking? We’ve put together this handy translation guide for recent headlines:



1. “Kevin Rudd played with children as the nation’s finances were laid bare” (Daily Telegraph, 13 August)

Translation: If we had a picture of Rudd playing the fiddle against a backdrop of western Sydney burning we would have used that instead



2. “Jobs market ‘flatlines’ in July” (The Australian, 8 August)

Translation: Jobs figures are inconveniently steady this month



3. “Jobs fall a blow to Rudd” and “Rudd wrong as QLD jobs jump” (The Australian, 9 August)

Translation: Whether the jobs figures go up or down, Rudd is bad



4. “Trust me: Abbott urges fresh start for Australia” (Herald Sun, 12 August)

Translation: Trust him: His political slogans are our front-page news



5. “I know nuthink!” (Daily Telegraph, 8 August, with Rudd, Anthony Albanese and Craig Thomson pictured as Hogan’s Heroes)

Translation: Our readers are over 50. They’ll get it.



6. “Abbott cements lead as Rudd slips” (The Australian, 12 August, on Newspoll)

Translation: Two party–preferred stats remain unchanged; Rudd’s personal lead over Abbott now merely large, compared to massive



7. “$20m to woo Muslim voters” (Daily Telegraph, 12 August)

Translation: Rudd government gives $20m to aged-care facilities in Sydney’s Muslim and Lebanese Christian communities – but as they’re Lebanese, we will refer to them all as Muslim



8. “Opposition gets to crunch the numbers” (Adelaide Advertiser, 12 August, on the Pre-election Economic and Fiscal Outlook, PEFO)

Translation: Let’s pretend the Coalition actually wants to release costed policies based on Treasury figures



9. “More volatility ahead for budget: PEFO” (The Australian, 13 August)

Translation: The budget forecasts are exactly the same as they were in the previous economic statement



10. “Economy heads for fatal slowdown: Rolling coverage” (Adelaide Advertiser, 13 August)

Translation: Listen to us bang on about how terrible the economy is until this government is voted out



11. “Bill Shorten to lead Labor, say punters” (Adelaide Advertiser, 13 August)

Translation: Rudd has already lost the election, say drunk people in bars



12. “Williams resigns as News Corp chief” (The Australian, 9 August)

Translation: Good riddance, weakling. **** is about to get real.



13. “Kick this mob out” (Daily Telegraph, 5 August)

Translation not required

Something non-partisan

Alt rock vid with real pollies and media heads playing themselves

The lefty momentum against Abbott and Murdoch is picking up a bit - not sure how much real force it will have in the electorate but right now I'm thinking a hostile senate is the best bet for the country.

Coalition floated the idea of buying old boats from Indonesian fisherman so they wouldn't be used to send refugees to Australia

This pretty much sums up the ridicule the suggestion was met with

Strike another blow for the 21st Century.

These guys went overseas and tried to sell the Abbott broadband plan to consumers - they were laughed at. Sometimes we forget why the NBN was a vote winner.



Although given how much crap is flung at him on the interwebs it's easy to understand why he doesn't want it any easier to get access.

Apropos comment

David Pilling, Asia editor of the Financial Times, begins his column on the economic context of the choice between “an unlikeable narcissist” and “an unpopular misogynist"

A guide to Australian politics and parties for non-Australians and also Australians too.
Posted on August 21, 2013

An American friend of mine expressed how confusing he found Australian politics and political parties. Therefore, I have produced this handy guide to our major parties that will be useful for Australians and non-Australians alike.

Background: how Australian government works (sort of)
Every three years, a bunch of politicians get together and everyone kind of yells at each other and says the same three words for ages. Then elections are held and whoever wins a seat is rounded up into a big paddock we generally refer to as ‘Canberra’. Then they continue to yell at each other.

We have preferential voting in Australia, which means that people develop the useful mindset of voting for the parties they least hate first, and the ones that hate most last, in a numbered list of candidates. Here’s a webcomic of this is in action featuring a sentient koala.

To win an election, a party has to win the most seats, and either form government in its own right or form a coalition minority government. We do not directly elect the Prime Minister of Australia but the party who wins government decides this by ritual of skolling schooners of beer. Therefore by extrapolation of data our best PM ever was Bob Hawke, once a world record holder for such talent.

Read the rest of the tongue in cheek but many a true word spoken in jest (with pictures) review of the 2013 election players (including the sex party doing bad Gotye rips)

http://noblekraken.wordpress.com/2013/08/21/a-guide-to-australian-politics-and-parties-for-non-australians-and-also-australians-too/

That was hilarious, Hinge.

Sounds kinda like you guys get as royally screwed over as USians.

Loved it! And it isn't even not true!

I liked Ken the voting dingo

If MLK were alive today and living in Australia

Oops ken is not one image