Fell in love with my best friend but He chose Her.

Stop being a doormat and tell this loser to hit the road.

Find someone who will appreciate you for who and what you are, and won't throw a bad situation from a decade and a half ago (which you were not fully in control of) in your face every time he doesn't feel like making a commitment but still wants to string you on and do the nasty.

Sorry about all this. This is just not losing a lover, but losing a friend.

But re: the romantic thing you seem to have - He seems to be living in the past OR he is looking for an excuse to not commit to you at this time. It's easy to say, "You missed your chance." That's his way out and it's a poor excuse.

What is this online thing he has? Again, that's his way of not committing.

I know this will be hard for you, but you must cut him off completely as your lover. He needs to appreciate you, so don't see him for a while and see if he misses you.

Otherwise you will be his friend with benefits. Is that good enough for you?

It seems there isn't much you can do other then to completely break away from the friendship. Right now, he's just using you. It seems that breaking up the friendship will help both of you though it will be an utterly difficult time.

15 years is a long time to eventually fall in love with someone and expect him to have the same feelings when it seems you only up to recently felt mutual feelings. I expect he still loves you but holds a massive grudge because it took you so long to come around. Too little too late I believe.

As for ...

This is either a disingenuous sentiment or a tad naive. If you ever considered him a good friend, he was always in the middle of these battles and fights already whether you wanted to protect him from these experiences or not. It's the nature of solid friendship to worry and fret over the stresses and battles of their friends when they go through these times of crisis. Seemingly, you didn't save him from experiencing these hard times as if he was/is a genuine friend throughout these times then he would have been compelled to empathize and root for you while you and your ex battled it out. I believe that much of his grudge is born out of the fact he suffered along side you during this time and feels (irrationally or not) you didn't acknowledge his emotional sacrifice and support for you during these hard times.

Perhaps consider keeping the friendship, stopping the sex. Something like "this doesn't feel right now that you and Suzy are serious. Let's just be friends from here on out." That frees you up to pursue something new and clarifies his options for him. From your description this guy is no catch, but that is your call.

A handeful of times in 3 years and he's in love? Yeah, na.

You've let him know you want more than friends with benefits, he's constantly according to you already, told you he's bitter and you had your chance.

Sounds to me it's EGO... and he's a nutter. I mean what guy taunts someone for ever?

Stop being a friends with benefits to some guy that puts you down, who tells you there is someone else but wants the sex. What are you a toy to play with?

Good for you for wanting a proper relationship, now go out and get it and tell this one, actually, "I'm taking my chance" with someone else.......

Let him think on that for the next 15 years.... He'd hate to lose....