My sexuality is ALWAYS in question!

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I come from a place where being anything but straight is just wrong, and absolutely everybody I talk to about my feelings still says it's not right to be gay. I'm a woman that 100% loves men, and I have a boyfriend that I have sex with all the time, but I still find myself thinking about women all the time. When I watch porn I automatically gravitate towards lesbian tribbing and stuff like that. I have urges to have sex with women all the time, but my boyfriend says its wrong and I just need to get over it. I feel like I am bi sexual, but maybe sense I'm just 22 it's hormones or something. I just really need some help and honest opinions from somebody that doesn't judge me. Thanx...

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Type: Question • Score: 3 • Views: 851 • Replies: 6

@jazz23,

Sounds to me like peer and societal pressures are forcing you into a situation that isn't working for you. Is moving away from there an option, or at least an option that you could plan for in the future (e. g. save money, get a good education, that sort of thing?)?

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@jespah,

Yes I don't plan on living here forever, but if I am going to marry my boyfriend of 3 years I want him to accept me for who I am. That's one reason why I still haven't married him because I really don't know if I want girls also. I have never had lesbian sex, but I have kissed and touched girls and I liked it.

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@jazz23,

Then you need to talk to him. You've been going out for 3 years and this subject has got to be broached. Otherwise, if you do consent to wed him, I think you're hurtling in the direction of a potentially very unhappy situation. Even if you're neither bi nor gay, or you never act on these feelings, etc. It's the inability to communicate on such a basic level with someone you have known that long - THAT is what I believe is the most troubling.

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@jazz23,

First thing you need to think of is being honest with yourself. you are still working through your self acceptance. He appears not to be accepting of your desire to explore your sexuality.

Quote:

my boyfriend says its wrong and I just need to get over it.

Don't accept someone else trying to tell you how you should behave, believe or define your sexuality for you.

1. are you ready to settle down with someone in a marriage? Are you ready to commit to anyone be they m or F?
2. no matter which gender you have as a partner, accept it and hopefully you won't ever feel limited or confined .

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Things to figure out:

Who you want to be like
Who you want
Who you are.

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@jazz23,

Hey, I recommend exploring your options. Find out if it's hormones or you really are attracted to women. Take care!

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My sexuality is ALWAYS in question!

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