For me this relationship is not normal...

Hello, I want to share my story and ask for advice. I am so stuck in my situation I may be don't see the picture right any more, so please help! Year and a half ago i found new boyfriend. He was my collegue at work. We are soft devs, and nothing requires that we have to hide our relationship. In fact we had many collegues in realtionship and none of them were hiding it! But he asked me in the office to not show that we have a realtionship. He refused to ever go to the coffee shop in the building with me, when we met in the corridor with other people, he act like we are just collegues and nothing more. Don't get me wrong, I dont want to kiss, hug ot something like this at work. I just want a normal realtionship that i don't have to lie to everybody at work that i am not with him. And i also wanted to have coffee together from time to time with him and other collegues, have fun in the breaks. He always went to coffee and lunch with other people, never ask me to come too. When I asked him to come to coffe, he usualy came up with some lame excuse that he had a lot of work and after half hour he went with someone else. So I told him that I don't wanna keep our relationship a secret, that this is offensive. After some arguing when he always said that to have a collegue for a girlfriend is very unproffessional and this is why he wanna "keep low profile", he finaly said that this is not so important for him, and he'll accept my desire. That happened when i said I would not accept for anyone to hide me from anyone and I was ready to give up on our relationship. So he agreed with my terms. But that was not the case. He continued to hide me, never ask me to coffee with him and the others, never accept my invitations. I tried to talk to him again. He started talking the same thing as we never talked for this before. I have one question, tell me what you think - if to never have a collegue as a girlfriend is his very important principle, but he broke this principal...shouldn't he accept the consequences?! Why I should accept the consequences, feeling offended, humiliated and eventually turn into a joke for the other collegues?! I staid in the relationship because he was very sure that he doesn't do anything wrong, that this is just his principle and because he didn't hide me from people outside the office. But outside the office he controls to whom he will introdice me. After several months he found new job, he wasn't satisfied with the work they gave him at our company. So the problem dissappeard. We were no longer collegues. But that make me feel unsecure about our relationship and his respect for me. He is always jujing me for everything, he always find flaws in me, he never says good thing, he never makes me feel that I am the perfect women for him. I think I am not wrong - every previous boyfriend of mine had told me good thing about me, thing that I am so he is so happy to have me, that I am the only one he admires right now (as a women he likes, not as friend he admires). But my current boyfriend always makes me feel I am not good enough, and I have to work on myself to be the best for him. This is how I feel, he never says it right in my face, he find other ways to show me. He make me so unseccure I become jelaous and I am not that kind of person. I never become so crasy about a previous boyfriend's female friend. He is the only one tha makes me go out of my skin and the problem stay like this because he never said he is sorry for that "hide and seek " thing" at work. I don't believe him, he thinks it is unproffesional. If that was true he would never started anything with me instead of hiding me. And even if it was the true, if he loved me he would change this thing when he see how bad it makes me feel. Am I wrong?