how do i convince her to move

Clearly play the beauty and sun angle, play it out as a chance of a life time, Chicago? Vs that place?..
What?
Is this even a question?.. She got family by the bunch there or what?
That might get her to come after you, right?

Play it to death and she will think about it after you have gone.
Beach on demand, sun, happy life and health, watersports, vacations by the bucket load on a bus ride... No question.

What is she supposed to do while you're in school? She's too young to sit at home and twiddle her thumbs. I'm making the assumption she's moving to USC to move into your apartment, right? Or are you asking her to move to another city, find a new place to live, find a job, new friends, etc...?

You're going to need to give far more then flattery and weather to get someone to make such a large commitment. You need to help her make a solid plan for life in California other then potential days for sunbathing.

does she want to go to school? can you help her find scholarships that would allow her to go to university?

if she's not eligible for scholarships, help her figure out if there is a good job market for her in California

that's actually an interesting point, though I'd come down on the opposite side of this from nothingtodo. I'd rather live in Chicago than pretty much anyplace I've heard of in California.

she moved to chicago with her dad, most family is back in Alabama

I'm asking her to move to Cali, move in with me at SC and work wherever she wants to work

I think you're going to need to do a better selling job than that. True love only keeps things interesting for so long.

we've talked about nearby community colleges since there are a lot in LA. If not than we're both sure that there would be a job opening at a department store or something along those lines

Have you (either/or) looked at the nearby college offerings and the costs? who is going to pay for her education?

What job postings have you (either/or) found online for her?

If she doesn't find a job, who is going to support both of you?

Something seems missing from this picture for my understanding. How do you both expect to pay the rent, relocating fees, utilities and transportation? Rent is pretty high in LA. Also, people just out of high school don't go about moving in together and relocating into a city half way around the country with a boyfriend. I can't say this all seems too wise or thought out.

What do her parents and yours have to say?



Why do think that? It's just after the holidays so department stores and other retailers cut back ..not hire new hires.

How old are you two?

Are you a freshman?

Here's an excerpt from his other recent post:

we have an there are some pretty affordable comm. colleges (LACC or LA Southwest CC). She has some money in her savings for school, i'll pitch as much as i can. Jobs can be found on Craigslist ( not the best idea but it's a start). My parents are more than willing to help support us financially until we get it figured out

18 , seniors

The fact that you talk about her like this really suggests to me that you are somewhat immature; it may be that your girlfriend is beginning to realise this and perhaps that is why she is reluctant to move all that way. Her hair color and the fact that she looks OK in a bikini has precisely what relevance to the question?

Sorry - but you are way to young for you to even ASK and way too young for her to commit to that kind of move.

Tough it out. Spend a year there and see how you deal with school. Then if you feel the same, start up the discussion.

Don't ask her to make this move. She is just too young.

I love Chicago and I love California more. I know Los Angeles well, lived there something like 43 years, five in Chicago area in later grammar school. USC is a good school, and, yes, expensive.

The Cal State campuses are also rather good, but there is, last I looked, a crush to get into them as they are having statewide financial challenges. I may not be up to date on the latest on that, and if you two are interested re her going to one of those, do some research.

The city colleges (junior colleges) are often good, Santa Monica being most appreciated, and that college is one of or the main junior college in the area to send graduates with A.A. degrees to UCLA, a fine university on the west side of town. In my time UCLA was tuition free, but not anymore.

Living around USC is tricky, as a bunch of the area around it is crime addled. My husband went to usc and lived his life until he met me in one very tough part of town, near the university.

I wish you both well, jrice - good fortune and happiness, however it works out.

On convincing her to move - I'm not much of a fan of trying to convince anyone to do anything. It's her life. Try not to manipulate her into a move. She will figure out what she wants to do, now or later on.

You might even end up doing some intermediate thing. She remains in Chicago and experiences life there, you go to USC and experience life there, and see what happens. You will have both tested yourselves in new environments and learned a lot, which is what being eighteen or nineteen is all about.

Oh, by the way. Californians who are not newbies rarely call it Cali. There is much antipathy to that, including from me, she spits, while smiling.

http://www.urbandictionary.com/define.php?term=cali

she and i both know i'm joking