I'm scared of being hurt. What's your advice?

Forums: Advice, Relationship, Distance
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My boyfriend will be leaving to follow his dreams in a few years. I'm staying behind, because this is where my goals are. We plan on turning it into a long-distance relationship and hoping that we can be reunited, but we don't know that.

The future is so unsure, and I'm scared that I'll be hurt when he leaves. I asked my sister for advice, and she said I should break up with him now because it'll be harder later on, and that I might hold him back if he gets too attached to me.

I'd like to think that everything will work out, but I don't know if I'm just saying that because I don't want to let go of the wonderful relationship I have now. What's your advice?

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@PinkLipstick,

long distance relationship only serve a purpose when the time apart is relatively limited and will come to an known end. he is leaving for forever from the sound it it. waiting for someone who is not planning on coming back is idiotic.

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@hawkeye10,

But he's not leaving yet. It'll be another couple of years until he leaves. We can make a lot of happy memories in that time. But it's true that I don't know if he'll come back once he leaves. Best case scenario, he finishes his studies and comes back to get a job near me. Worst case scenario, he finishes his studies and finds a better job elsewhere.

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@PinkLipstick,

lets examine

Quote:

I should break up with him now because it'll be harder later on,

will it be harder to do this when there is a good reason to do it(no more good times because he is gone) than now when you are having fun? call me skeptical.

Quote:

and that I might hold him back if he gets too attached to me.

him thinking you are holding him back is up to him to decide, and likewise leaving you because if it is as well. stay in your own lane

my issue is you are already planning on staying with him (as much as this can be called being with him) after he is gone, which seems stupid to me. I probably would not end a relationship today which was working for me today, that does not make sense to me.

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Try to ask yourself a thousand times if what it'll bring you two if you decide to break up on him? Do you think distance will change your feelings unto him? Think about that!

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Why are you worrying about something that might happen a few years from now?

He could get killed in a car accident next week.

Your worry is pointless.

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@PinkLipstick,

A lot can happen in two years. If you are both getting something out of the relationship right now then just chill and enjoy it. If it gets to the stage when he's actually going and you are so in love then something will enable you to be together. All I know is looking that far ahead means you are not living in the moment. Just enjoy the ride. How old are you out of interest? And how long have you been together?

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I'm scared of being hurt. What's your advice?

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