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Strange Dream about my Brother

 
 
Reply Sun 23 Sep, 2012 03:04 pm
I'm not going to give my name, but you can call me L. I’m going to start off by talking about my family life. My mom left about 2 years ago and my dad is always working. I have an older brother, I’ll call him Z. Z is very protective of me, and he always knows what to say when I’m feeling down. Him and I are very close, I tell him everything about my life and he gives me advice when I need it. I love him like a sister should, but lately things have been feeling different with me… As for my personal life, I have had a few boyfriends, but nothing too serious. I’ve never had sex before, but the furthest I’ve gone with a guy was giving him a hand job. Now onto my problem. Almost every night recently, I have been having, what start off as nightmares, that turn into strange sexualized dreams. It starts off where I am kidnapped by this older man who has a deformed face. He takes me to this warehouse-like place, where he threatens to rape, then kill me. It gets to the point where the older man is just about to do horrible things to me, when my brother bursts in out of no where, kills the older man and then rescues me. Then randomly everything fades and I’m in my house with my brothers arms around me. We are kissing and slowly I fill with lust. We end up going all the way together… And when I wake up afterwards, I feel extremely stimulated and I’ve even enjoyed the dream. Throughout the morning it wears off and I feel normal again. I’m just afraid that I might be talking in my sleep when the lustful parts start happening, and Z might be hearing me while I’m sleeping. What do I do? Do I open up to Z and tell him I have been having these lustful dreams about him? Do I try to forget about it? How can I stop this dream from happening over and over again? Please help… I’m so confused…
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Type: Question • Score: 2 • Views: 8,389 • Replies: 33
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Mame
 
  2  
Reply Sun 23 Sep, 2012 03:43 pm
@blondie1010,
Don't tell him if you value your relationship with him. This would creep most people out.

These are dreams, and if you feel like this in real life, you should see a therapist.

Don't know how you can stop the dreams from happening; you're not responsible for what happens when you're asleep.

Just keep quiet and give it time.
blondie1010
 
  1  
Reply Sun 23 Sep, 2012 03:49 pm
@Mame,
Ok, thank you so much for the help!
Mame
 
  1  
Reply Sun 23 Sep, 2012 04:00 pm
@blondie1010,
If you're being sarcastic, you shouldn't be... what else is there to suggest? Do you want us to tell you to act on your dreams??

Really, it's creepy to have a sibling to have lustful feelings for another - maybe not for YOU, but your brother might hate it and then where would your relationship be?

I was being serious - give it TIME... you might start dreaming/fantasizing about someone who is actually attainable. If you tell your brother, he's likely going to be disgusted and will reject you. If you don't tell him, you have a chance of things going back to normality. And if he's not disgusted, then go ahead and do what you want.

These are DREAMS. But, as I said, if you feel like this about him while you're awake, SEE A COUNSELLOR.

And you're welcome, you ungrateful brat.
blondie1010
 
  1  
Reply Sun 23 Sep, 2012 04:09 pm
@Mame,
I wasn't being sarcastic at all! And it never even crossed my mind to act on these dreams... No, I don't have these feelings while I'm awake. Only when I'm asleep. I'm just... torn inside. Because I want to tell him that this is happening, but I don't want him to be disgusted with me like you say. I should have put down more info about the situation...

The more I think about it, the more I feel like these dreams keep happening because of some... void in my heart. I mean, who my brother is as a person, is everything I would want in a boyfriend or husband.

When my last relationship ended, I was devastated and Z was always there to help me and make me feel happy again. Maybe my body is reacting to what he does for me, not who he is?
FOUND SOUL
 
  1  
Reply Sun 23 Sep, 2012 05:08 pm
@blondie1010,
Blondie,

We all want a shining knight to come to our rescue and feel like a princess, when we are young.

You're not sexually active but at the age when you are starting to feel like a "woman" that's natural and normal.

You are at the age where you want your knight to come and rescue you, and have a loving relationship that is real.

So, your dreams reflect "someone" saving you and the only one that has is your Brother and so, he comes into the dreams.

I suggest you visualise someone that you have a crush on, a movie star, singer and start visualising that person as the one that saves you.

On a phycological point of view, it's not healthy seeing your brother in these dreams in that way.

On another note. Not to be rude. But, he is older than you and protects you, think back as to whether he has ever been in-appropriate that you don't remember, can't recall. And, if not him, an older man, a Father figure. Sometimes we supress things.. Hypnotherapy may help there but have a deep honest think.. Because, that could be the only other explanation in "my opinion" as to why you are having those dreams.
blondie1010
 
  1  
Reply Sun 23 Sep, 2012 06:28 pm
@FOUND SOUL,
I know it's not healthy... That's why I am so worried about it.

Thank you for the advice, I will put someone else in his place. Hopefully the dreams will start to fade.
0 Replies
 
oralloy
 
  2  
Reply Sun 23 Sep, 2012 10:25 pm
@FOUND SOUL,
FOUND SOUL wrote:
On another note. Not to be rude. But, he is older than you and protects you, think back as to whether he has ever been in-appropriate that you don't remember, can't recall. And, if not him, an older man, a Father figure. Sometimes we supress things.. Hypnotherapy may help there but have a deep honest think.. Because, that could be the only other explanation in "my opinion" as to why you are having those dreams.


That's how false memories, and the corresponding false charges against the innocent, get started.
0 Replies
 
blondie1010
 
  1  
Reply Sun 23 Sep, 2012 11:29 pm
@FOUND SOUL,
And there wasn't any in-appropriate behavior going on around me, at least not in my immediate family.
FOUND SOUL
 
  1  
Reply Mon 24 Sep, 2012 02:30 am
@blondie1010,
Quote:
That's how false memories, and the corresponding false charges against the innocent, get started.


Not really, it's a question one of which she answered.. Sometimes, there are other reasons why you dream of a "knight" she has answered, yes it has happened to her, but not from immediate family.

Quote:
And there wasn't any in-appropriate behavior going on around me, at least not in my immediate family.


I wonder then, if your association is purely with the "knight" who happens to be your brother, due to what you have gone through, which you don't have to go into.

I do think therefore, the easiest way around this is to focus as stated on someone you admire, of the male sex..

I'm sorry for whatever you went through but not all guys are like that, remember that.
oralloy
 
  1  
Reply Mon 24 Sep, 2012 03:09 am
@FOUND SOUL,
FOUND SOUL wrote:
oralloy wrote:
FOUND SOUL wrote:
On another note. Not to be rude. But, he is older than you and protects you, think back as to whether he has ever been in-appropriate that you don't remember, can't recall. And, if not him, an older man, a Father figure. Sometimes we supress things.. Hypnotherapy may help there but have a deep honest think.. Because, that could be the only other explanation in "my opinion" as to why you are having those dreams.


That's how false memories, and the corresponding false charges against the innocent, get started.


Not really,


Yes really. Struggling to remember something that never happened, can create a false memory of it having occurred.

Hypnosis only makes it even more likely.
FOUND SOUL
 
  1  
Reply Mon 24 Sep, 2012 03:23 am
@oralloy,
Oralloy, she hasn't had hypnotherapy but she has confirmed that she has been abused but not from her intimate family.

There is nothing false about that.

Now, why not let this go so the girl can not hear your arguement over something she hasn't done, ie) hypno just for the sake of an arguement and let the girl talk..

She came here for a reason, I won't answer you further.
oralloy
 
  1  
Reply Mon 24 Sep, 2012 04:48 am
@FOUND SOUL,
FOUND SOUL wrote:
Oralloy, she hasn't had hypnotherapy but she has confirmed that she has been abused but not from her intimate family.

There is nothing false about that.


I must have missed that confirmation.

But even if that is the case, it does not change the reality that struggling to remember something that is not there, can create a false memory. And it does not change the fact that this is only exacerbated by hypnosis.



FOUND SOUL wrote:
Now, why not let this go so the girl can not hear your arguement over something she hasn't done, ie) hypno just for the sake of an arguement and let the girl talk..


Because it is important that she understands how extremely dangerous your suggestions were.



FOUND SOUL wrote:
She came here for a reason


I bet the reason was not so she could acquire false memories.



FOUND SOUL wrote:
I won't answer you further.


That's OK. But better yet if you don't make any more perilously dangerous suggestions.
0 Replies
 
Mame
 
  2  
Reply Mon 24 Sep, 2012 06:03 am
@FOUND SOUL,
FOUND SOUL wrote:

Oralloy, she hasn't had hypnotherapy but she has confirmed that she has been abused but not from her intimate family.

There is nothing false about that.



I don't see where she said that at all. This is a DREAM she's talking about, you fruitcake. Why in the world would you think she's suppressing abuse??

There was a whole raft of these 'false memories' that got dragged out in hypnotherapy a while back and it created all kinds of false accusations against innocent men. Remember the play Oleanna by David Mamet? That's just the sort of thing he wrote about.

You need to get a grip on reality and stop giving people dangerous suggestions that have no basis in reality.
PUNKEY
 
  1  
Reply Mon 24 Sep, 2012 07:56 am
Sounds like you didn't bounce back from that last breakup and turned to your brother for comfort - too much.

You may be entering into an "emotional incest" relationship with your brother but you really don't want to have that. He will go on and have his own family and you need to know your roll then.

Sounds like you need to get out more. How old are you?
blondie1010
 
  1  
Reply Mon 24 Sep, 2012 09:09 am
@PUNKEY,
I do know my roll, I will NEVER act on these dreams. I just want them to stop.

And when my dad isn't out of state, most of the time I am out with friends, at my vocal lessons or just enjoying the sun by the lake.

I'm 17.
Z is 20.
0 Replies
 
Aldistar
 
  2  
Reply Mon 24 Sep, 2012 09:39 am
The dream itself is a normal one to be having at your age, the love interest being your brother is not. I don't think it very alarming, especially with what you have said about his role in your life and the fact you have no waking urges to act on the dream. The advice to concentrate on a different savior (real or imaginary) is a good idea.

You said you worry about being over heard while you sleep. Do you have your own room? If so, learn to sleep with your door closed and you should be ok.
Aldistar
 
  2  
Reply Mon 24 Sep, 2012 10:32 am
Also, I wanted to address your other question. I would NOT tell your brother about his role in these dreams. That will just open a door you will never be able to close again. There are really only two ways I can see that going.

1. He is freaked out and it will damage your relationship.
2. He professes similar dreams and/or feelings and you get creeped out.

Either way, the dreams are not something you should worry to much about, IMO, unless you carry the urges over into your waking life. Find another knight in shining armor to fixate on before you fall asleep.
blondie1010
 
  1  
Reply Mon 24 Sep, 2012 11:59 am
@Aldistar,
I will, thank you.
0 Replies
 
cicerone imposter
 
  2  
Reply Mon 24 Sep, 2012 12:16 pm
I've never had dreams similar to yours, but I've had some strange dreams that seems to come out of nowhere. Even strange looking aliens that doesn't resemble anything I've ever seen while awake. I have also had sex fantacies, and I know that I will never act upon them, because the woman is always a complete stranger. I interpret them to mean that we have no control over what we dream.

You should be able to overcome your dreams; don't keep repeating them in your mind - because that's the worst thing you can do.

 

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