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TODAYS THOUGHT
The truth, the whole truth, and nothing but the truth.
-Legal Oath

Some truths are harder to face than othrs. Yes, I eat too much and lose my temper with the kids. Yes, I tend to be selfish sometimes and manipulative, too. But no, I don't remember much about my childhood. I guess it was as happy as most people's.

Sound familiar? Many people working to improve their self-esteem identify themselves as Adult Children. To their great credit, they've joined forces for mutual comfort and support. But many Adult Children still spend a lot of energy fending off the past instead of accepting it. Understandably, they have more trouble than most in coming to grips with yesterday. Their yesterdays were a nightmare.

Perhaps their parents were practicing alcoholics or religious zealots or simply unavailable emotionally. Perhaps there was constant fighting, or demeaning remarks were made. Who wouldn't want to forget such misery? Yet that misery really happened, it is an important part of the Adult Child's personal truth.

Only by acknowledging and accepting that truth can Adult Children be done with it and get on the task of making today everyting it can be. Only then can healing and restoration of a positive self-image begin.

Denial ties me to the past.

Name it, accept it, get mad over it, accept it again, get over the resentment, accept it again, get mad at it again, accept it, let it go!

Today's thought is:

We wonder "How can I ever say this?

We need to be free to talk about anything in our intimate relationships. Some things are very hard to say - an old secret we have never told before, a feeling or an observation our partner does not want to hear, a mistake we made that calls for confession. We wonder, "How can I ever say this? How can I avoid hurting myself or my partner?"

Not all things need to be said at once. Readiness is the first part. We can get ourselves ready to speak. The second part is timing. When we are ready, we wait for a good moment to appear, a moment in which our message will fit. The third part is love. Honesty coupled with care and love is healing and strengthening. Some pain is necessry in a growing relationship, and we can totlerate it because it leads to more understanding and more peace of mind.

Think of one new thing you would like to tell your mate about your thoughts, feelings, or behavior.

Are any of you familiar with this site?

http://sobercity.com/

I recommend it.

Thanks Merry, I've added it to my bookmarks and thanks to seaglass, those are some very good sobering thoughts.

todays thought
Never play leapfrog with a unicorn.
-Unknown

As we work Step One, we accept that alcohol and other drugs are
poison to us. We accept our limits. This means we know that hanging around our drinking or using "buddies" can remind us of the "the good old days. Hanging around "slippery places: means we could "slip" back into our ways. This isn't testing our sobriety, it's being reckless with it.

So, let's accept our limits. Everybody has limits. When we know our limits, we protect our recovery against the people and places that pull us from our spiritual center. This is what true acceptance means.

Prayer for the Day
I prayfor true acceptance. Higher Power, help me to stay away from slippery places. I will protect the gift You've given me.

Action for the Day
Today, I'll list the people and places that are risky for me to around. I will share this list with my sponsor, my group, and my sober friends.

Hello my dear family of AA members. After the
women in recovery retreat at the end of Jan. and
the trip to my daughter's right after that - I FEEL as
if I have been gone forever!
I have missed you all! And boy am I ever glad to
be home. It was freezing in S. Carolina, but then
just as we were getting ready to leave - the temps
started to warm up...and then I get back home to
N Florida to find record low temps here!
I feel like a little lizard looking for a nice hot rock
in the sun to warm up my blood. Cold from the
inside out. (and it is not all that cold here)
I would hate to see what I'd be like living up in PA.
again.
My 1st step is one that I always seem to remember
to keep close by. I NEED for it to stay GREEN for me,
so I never have that euphoric recall - where I tell
myself that this time I drink, it will be different.
It's never going to be any different for me, I am
an alcoholic....I grew up in alcoholism, married into
alcoholism, divorced and then began to drink myself.
How much more proof could a person need?
All I know is that it took me over 9 years to stop
lying to myself that I was a "normal drinker". Not
one thing about MY drinking was close to normal.
Today - I'm glad it wasn't. If not for my alcoholism,
I'd never have found such a wonderful group of
people with whom to share my experience, strength
and hope. Not to mention that my entire recovery
was based on hearing my home group's examples
of sharing experience, strength and hope.
So, I suppose I am grateful to be an alcoholic. IF
not - what tremendous adventures I would have
missed out on. And what terrific people I would not
have got to know.

Well, with my big bald head, I have to admit every day that I am powerless first over alcohol and second over a great number of people, places and things I deal with each day. Alcohol made my life unmanageable, but I have learned in AA that I have to live each day one at a time. I am a live each moment kind of guy. The "moments" turn into minutes, hours, days, years . . . etc.

Today's Thought
Lost warriors have only to open their eyes to find the right and good path.
- Chief Red Mountain

We all carry a fountain of joy inside. This joy is not something special given to only a few of us. An abundance of joy, happiness, and peace is our right. Our hearts were meant to be full of love and laughter.

We have been promised that our lives will get better. Even the worst situations will be made right. As we walk the path of recovery, our lives do get better. When we think we have reached our limit of joy and happiness, something else happens. We get happier. Life will be without troubles, but joy and gratitude will heal all wounds and shine through all problems.

Today let me accept, without fear, the new joy I feel.

Where is everybody? Nobody has posted anything since Sunday. Hey, guys, I need your support.

Hello talk to me, I am here and will be the whole night!

Speak andrew,
...I'm here for you.

AA Thought for the Day - February 15, 2000

Promise

"Our whole attitude and outlook upon life will change.
We will suddenly realize that God is doing for us
what we could not do for ourselves.
Are these extravagant promises? We think not.
They are being fulfilled among us--
sometimes quickly, sometimes slowly.
They will always materialize if we work for them."
Alcoholics Anonymous, p. 84.


Thought to Ponder....

From darkness comes light.

Hi, all. It's so bloody cold here tonight I decided to skip my usual Saturday night meeting and stay by the 'puter instead. Somewhere around five below on the Fahrenheit scale. Did I really used to venture out on nights like this just to get a drink? Brave the elements for a shot of rotgut?

You bet your bippy I did.

I remember one time when I was living in the woods in New Hampshire, walking across the frozen pond to the main road, then four miles to the nearest grocery store to buy a sixpack of beer because that's all I had money for. Couldn't move the car because there was too much snow on the three-quarters-of-a-mile long dirt road to my house. Walked back the four miles. By the time I got back to the cabin, I had drunk all six beers while walking. Damn' near made me cry but I was too tired to try that walk again.

I didn't have that long or hazardus a walk, but I would sometimes make 10 or more trips to the store, buying three beers at a time. I only bought three, because I didn't to drink too much, "this" was all I needed.
...Hey, ever hear the saying an alcoholic, trying to take one drink,and stop. is like trying to step off a twelve story building, and falling one floor.

Years ago, when I lived in Tennessee, neither my roommate nor I had very much money. I was the only one working, and my job was part-time at that.

Anyway, we used to scrape up enough coins between the two of us for a six-pack of Rolling Rock Beer. You could buy a six-pack for only $.99. What a deal!

On one snowy day, we didn't have enough gas in the roommate's Volkswagen Beetle to make it to the store. So, we abandoned the vehicle, walked to the store, bought the beer, then walked in blowing snow back to the house.

We weren't worried about the car, or the weather. We were just concerned about where that next beer was coming from, and sometimes, a "friend" would bring us a hit or two of speed to elevate the alcohol high.

My roomie and I lived through all this by the grace of God. We are both clean and sober for some years now and often reminisce about those days via e-mail. Our lives have taken different directions, and we each live in a different state.

Merry Andrew, if you ever need support, just reach out here. An AA member will always care enough to read your comments.

And don't forget the pm's Andrew.

That's right, Andrew: there are PM's - and even some email adresses!

It works, if you work it.

Here's my 2 cents for the day. I am in agreement with Andy, where are the posters? One important thing I have noticed is the thread that there are over 2,000 viewing as opposed to 200 odd postings which sez to me that folks are taking a look at what we have to say. It's important that we put the message out there -

I remember going to meetings at the Mustard Seed in NYC, and I guess my question is how was the seed of sobriety planted in your recovery experience.

seaglass