Why do socks disappear?

I don't have problem with socks.

problems...

Making an apt reference to Nicolai Gogol in a thread on disappearing socks is indeed an admirable accomplishment. I tip my hat to you, Ravenfeeder -- and welcome you to A2K.

Sheesh, I can't believe you people. Missing socks? Isn't it obvious?

The woolies under the bed eat them.

Fact one: Socks disappear from inside washing machines. I believe we are all in agreement on this one.

Fact two: Socks appear inside washing machines. Check your sock collection. There is always one odd sock that you never bought.

There have been scientific studies on this subject:

http://www.breakup.de/resources/socks.html

With the spontaneous destruction and creation of matter (aka socks), transportation from washing machine to washing machine, we already have a working prototype for teleportation involving quatam mechanics at the elemental level.

Now, if we can only predict where the sock will teleport to, create a massive washing machine and specific locations, and order a large number of size 136 socks, we could eliminate the need for mass transportation across the world.

We are THAT close to figuring it all out.

I did some tests, and it turns out socks do NOT disapear in dishwashers, or trash compactors.

I've done tests with socks alone, an entire load of laundry, and both with or without dishes/trash also included.

If you lived the life of a sock, wouldn't you try to escape as well?

Gives a whole new meaning to the concept of quantum foam.

Anyone thought of applying String Theory?

A friend of mine loves to tell a yarn about string theory. It's great! We're always needling him to repeat it. And he's got quite an eye for detail.

I'd have to agree that there is definitly a Sock Gnome.....let me tell you his story.

The Sock Gnome was born in Brussles, some time around the turn of the century. He lived in an abandoned washing machine with his mother (Key Mover Gnome), his father (Remote Hider Gnome) and his older brother (Alarm Clock Shut-off Gnome). Key Mover, Remote and Alarm Clock all had settled into their professions and were becoming quite good at them but Sock, who was working at the local McDonald's, wanted more. He dreamed big.
One day, he overheard one of his co-workers (Underware Gnome) talking about a place called America. He said that there was a terrible problem with abused socks. Sock knew that this was his chance. He interruped Underware and asked him if he was interested in seeing this 'America'. Underware said that yes he would and that night, the two of them left as stow aways in a trunk on a ship bound for America. When they arrived, Sock Gnome knew that it was his destiny to round up all the socks of the world and take them to a safe house where they would no longer be stepped on and shoved into dark, stinky places. He tried taking whole loads of socks but having all those socks was too obvious and he got busted. After spending a few months in the Big House, the Sock Gnome knew that he had to be smarter. He tried taking pairs of socks. This didn't work because he couldn't get the socks to stop talking. Sock Gnome knew that they would be caught if anyone heard them, so he stopped taking them in pairs. Eventually, he was forced to take only 1 sock at a time. No one could seem to figure out where that 1 lone sock had gone too. Blamed it on the dryer.
So now, to this very day, the Sock Gnome comes during the spin cycle to gather socks. He takes them back to his safe house where they live and love, happily ever after.


And that is the story of the Sock Gnome.

The Sock Gnome is Belgian? Whoahahahaha!

Don't be silly...of course the Sock Gnome is Belgian.

His Great Great grandfather was Waffle Gnome. :wink:

Right, Waffle Gnome! I heard off him. Didn't he die a horrible death when he was eaten by Napoleon?

Right after inventing Belgian Waffles, (and accidentally spilling syrup all over himself) Waffle Gnome WAS in fact eaten. Tragic and sad....poor waffle gnome...

It was his destiny to be eaten Kristie. I do like waffles actually

Ha, ha. You guys are SO punny. I can't stop laughing.

I heard of an Alaskan Pancake Gnome named Chomsky who had a close call with a similar syrup incident. Luckily for him he was saved by a neighbor who was always a bit of a sap for short people with beards. I dunno, the whole story leaves me flat. I've been waffling on whether or not I believe it. I don't typically put much stock in that kinda crepe... just don't find it full-filling. And of course the people who tell those stories like to batter you repeatedly with it until your brains are practically scrambled and you feel shell shocked. But unlike others, I didn't roll over-easy. I stood firm and I called the cops on 'em (I happen to know the elk they claim they hit with their car was, in fact, poached.)

Why do socks disappear
when you're near ...

Clearly the socks are being separated by bigots and extremists who cannot deal with the fact that socks are same sex pairs.