Why do socks disappear?

truth
Fresco, this thread is too deep for me. I suspect it has to do with string theory and multiple dimensions into which socks pass back and forth freely. This might also explain why other people's socks often end up in my dresser drawer.

In my parent's house, I attribute missing socks to the sock-eating monster that lives in the closet. How the monster is never there when I look for it is of no consequence - it's been well-established by me and my sister for many years that that closet has mysterious teleportational properties to it, involving the chain that turns the light off. I have never had quite the same rate of unexplained sock casualties when I am in a room with a closet without a pull-chain.

Is that a masturbation accusation? If so opps, my bad

On a related subject ladies, ever notice how the odds of tearing a hole in pantyhose the first time you put them on, increases in direct proportion to their cost?

Certainly that makes sense re the rule of disproportionate expense as related to saved penny purchases.

I'm not entirely kidding. When I went through my lab technology training at Scripps Institute, nylons were one of my major expenses. I think I quickly learned from others to buy 'supp hose', yucko, but useful.

They made you wear panty hose? I haven't worn panty hose since I was 7.

Well, you weren't born then, I don't think.
I have no idea if RN's and Lab technologists have to wear pantyhose when wearing skirts now.

The year I took trig at a city college in the summer between university semesters I was dumbfounded to hear I couldn't wear slacks.

I have to comment that a lot of what we all take for granted now didn't happen all that long ago. Perhaps long ago to the relatively young.

On a slightly expanded subject here, part of my mental expanse, such as it is, was getting ahold of the idea that my own place in time wasn't all there is/was. Not to accuse you of not understanding that. Just that understanding that ... grows. It is growing for me even now, many years later. and still it is sort of a surprise.

Haha, I guess I spoke (typed) before I thought really.... I'm going to college now and I see profs dressed sort of like I am and students wearing pj's to class. Panty hose is really in a different world. We've all got a somewhat narrow perspective on things, I suppose.

Aha! I just changed bed linens and found on that went AWOL in the corner of a fitted sheet.

Fresco;
i think what we should all do to properly reward you for starting this thread, is to all line up in a row, and have you walk by.
And as you pass by we can each give you a SOCK!

Just make sure its an odd number of people.

BoGoWo

Sock it to me !

We're all pretty odd here, Acquiunk.

Then we'd better mix the color of the socks

I tried to find the answer to this same question just about a month ago, by the most reasonable means possible. I put myself in for a cycle. You'd be surprised to find out how little I accomplished. I then tried tying numbered strings to each sock, and letting them hang out of the dryer. I count before and after each time, and have lost no socks. This leads to the conclusion that they must be lost in the washer (contrary to popular belief) and NOT the dryer. That should be helpful if anyone wants to continue my work.

A sock disappears because there is no quantum entanglement with its mate. It is the laundry equivalent of a husband going out for a pack of smokes and never returning. Chances are that the sock has a private life elsewhere much like Gogol's nose.

There is also the theory of the sock eating dog. So check the puppy 'tels' in your yard now and then.

Mine turn into hangers. Not of the airplane variety though...that would be cool.

Quantum theory will explain anything you need explained. Anything at all.

Well, that explains the horrible boils on my ass. It seems my universe is expanding, not shrinking.

Does it explain why, every morning, I am pissed off that the clocks are five minutes fast, but, by quitting time I am happy about it?

Has my parallel hypotenuse shifted?

Joe