Mental Decline & Dependency/Coping With Aging Loved Ones

What is sundowning, Noddy?

Alzheimer's patients--and other patients suffering from "senility" often have periods of irrational restlessness in the last afternoon and early evening as the sun is going down.

One guess is that on some level these patients are disturbed/stimulated by "transition" times.

http://www.mayoclinic.com/health/sundowning/HQ01463

http://www.ec-online.net/Knowledge/Articles/sundowntip.html

http://www.zarcrom.com/users/alzheimers/c-22a.html

In Mr. Noddy's case, I know he's "proving" what a diligent and competent householder and handyman he is. He insists that his bustling chores can only be done between 11 pm and 1 am.

He's not disoriented as much as focused in the wrong direction.

Walter, does your mother's nursing home have alarms on the exits to notify staff when someone might be wandering out?

Noddy, It's always something, isn't it? You are a strong woman. I hope you can get some help dealing with Mr. Noddy's excentricities.

They've one ward (floor), which can't be opened (easily) by people living there.

All the others living there can go and leave as long as they want (though they would, of course, like to be notified).
People really live there like it was their home = they are registered with this address at the town's residents registration office.

Only a judge can rule that someone has to stay inside/in bed/ and similar: otherwise it would be "Deprivation of Liberty" ((1) Whoever locks up a human being or otherwise deprives him of his liberty, shall be punished with imprisonment for not more than five years or a fine.(2) An attempt shall be punishable. ...)

Swimpy--

A2K is helping me survive Mr. Noddy's little ways and manners.

Thanks for the cheerful words.

I guess I thought your mom was in more of a nursing home situation. It sounds more like my mom's assisted living facility.

No, not at all: it is a nursing home. (We have a very different concept of "closing up" people here: I suppose, for instance, nearly 90% of those cases when you get handcuffed in the USA would be illegal here.)

Nursing homes are generally open - mother's has five entrances/exists, and the "information desk" is only staffed a couple of hours/day (and can only oversee the main entrance).

Noddy, my mother referred to late afternoons as the 'colic hour' similar to the fussiness of a baby during that same time of the day. She found that a protein snack (peanut butter and crackers, for instance) stabilized my father and settled his agitation somewhat.

JPB--

You think maybe he wants to wake me up so I can fix him a little midnight snackie?

Actually, snack-making with much rattling and banging is one of his midnight activities.

I went through the Glamour of the Night with sons and stepsons and this is the same sort of approach to making hay when no one else sees the opportunity.

Last night I took my bad temper to bed at 9 p.m. Mr. Noddy had a quiet evening.

Unfortunately the Family Dog was having tummy troubles. She woke me at 4 and 4:20 and 4:40. Not only did she want to visit the Great Out of Doors, she wanted me to console her for her misery.

The snow is falling--probably at a rate of an inch an hour. This will be a day of enforced togetherness.

I was so clever yesterday when I filled the bird feeders and replenished the suet.

Noddy -- Good to hear that Mr Noddy had a quiet evening.

My crystal ball predicts another 9 p.m. bedtime if you've been awake since before dawn and you have a full day of enforced togetherness. There's something to be said for early bedtimes and quiet evenings.

Perhaps some easy to grab protein-based snackies that Mr Noddy could find for himself could be identified in advance?

Walter -- Sorry that there's so much upheaval in planning this and that for your ladies. The more things change....

I'm glad that you and Mrs Walter are now able to spend more time in small trips together.

JPB--

There are plenty of snacks available. Mr. Noddy is particularly partial to ice cream and candy--marvelous for a diabetic.

His mother used to hide edible delights in kitchen cabinets, so when Mr. Noddy feels like a rootin', tootin' growin' boy he moves around the kitchen checking every possible storage space.

The thrill of the chase is part of his snacking satisfaction.

Thanks for the sympathy--and for the undoubtedly accurate prediction about bedtime.

Project for the day is convincing Mr. Noddy that while he may get the car down the hill, he will not be able to get the car up the hill and he may well get hung up on the icy ramparts that the township plow leaves along the roadside.

Isn't it going to be fun, waiting for the plow together!

I'm not diabetic yet, but love my snacks that includes ice cream and all manners of candies that usually includes chocolate. Some of the few pleasures of life that is hard to let go.

C.I.--

Half gallons of ice cream are no longer full half gallons--just cartons. Mr. Noddy consumes about four cartons of ice cream a week and between one and two pounds of candy.

He compensates by increasing his insulin.

He's about seventy pounds overweight.

oooh...that's an OUCH! Tell Mr Noddy that good health is the most important in our life, and "moderation" is the key. I try to balance eating all that junk food with walking regularly or working in my yard.

It was wet outside this morning, but I put on plastic covers on my shoes and swept up the leaves in my yard. My wife bought me a pepperoni pizza this morning for my lunch, but ate only half. I try.

My best friend was a diabetic, but loved to eat. It killed him.

Yesterday I had a two hour nap, but went to bed at 8.

I was up at 4 this morning--both Mr. Noddy and the dog were restless. Both Mr. Noddy and the dog settled into slumber once I was up and supervising.

The plow should come this morning. I'm looking forward to a driveway that can be driven in both directions. Bliss.

Raising my coffee cup in hopes of Saturday bliss for you, noddy.

JPB--

Thanks. Goal for today is survival with grace and dignity.

So I have been to the courthouse today.

I actually wanted to hand over some papers for my aunt's case - 'her' court clerk worked only in the afternoon today.

So I asked the clerk in the neighbour office to make copies.

This clerk was dealing with letter 'H', so I asked her about mother's case, wasn't on her desk .... but in the department's office.

And so I get "get sworn in" even before getting the invitation letter at home.

However: now I can do nothing at [mother's] home without asking the court, they even can order me to sell the house and all in it (= to avoid that taxpayers have to pay for mother = it's a general law, not a specific for someone like mother with a rather high pension).

On the other hand, if my sister was psoitive about what I want to do and testified that personally at the court .....

So I phoned her.

We didn't shoot each other.


I'll write all in a letter (and add some stuff like mother's will, bank regulations re what I could do there etc), so that she can talk about with her husband when he returns later this week, then they decide about it ...


The other alternative (besides that I would carry on and risk some civil and perhaps even criminal law suits later) would be, some professional legal guardian would take over the case.
Which would mean, we could buy - "from mother" - what we want, but all would be sold disregarding what it was ...


Since I'll get - according to mother's will - all money, cash, on bank accounts, in fonts etc, my sister woul'd be kind of extremely stupid if she would agree on selling the house, fixtures and all ...

Walter--

Slowly, slowly, slowly....

I'm glad your sister is starting to recognize that "Saying something doesn't make it so." Perhaps she's consulted a lawyer and heard The True Word from "her" lawyer's lips.

In any case, she's not kicking and screaming right now.

Hold your dominion.