Mental Decline & Dependency/Coping With Aging Loved Ones
One of the things I do regularly is spend two hours every Monday afternoon as the librarian of the day here. Our library is very small, but we try to keep it well stocked with the latest titles - books, CDs, DVDs, etc.
Every 3 or 4 months four of us get together and decide what to buy, then we go over to the New England Mobile Book Fair - an enormous rickety barn of a building to spend and spend and spend. The decision making is fun, and the Book Fair is wild and woolly as we go roaring up and down the aisles, flinging our finds into the shopping cart.
But the very best part is after we get our goodies home, and after choosing which titles to write about for Fox Hill's weekly schedule of events, taking our treasures upstairs and doing the annotations. One of us loves mysteries, another prefers fiction, and I get what I consider the best of the lot: politics, economics, and travel. Of course, there's a lot of overlap, and once in a while I find myself doing mysteries or novels, but everyone always ends up happy.
So after one or two more thank-you notes, I'll treat myself to a session of book annotations - just a few lines for each book, not in any sense real reviews.
Even when Bob was becoming so much worse, I kept my Monday library time. It was - and is - my big event of the week, and I had the backup authority of the people in our Wellness Clinic reassuring me that I must take this time for myself. Toward the end I had to have a home aide come in to stay with Bob, but it was money well spent, helping greatly both my entertainment and my morale.
Noddy - the afternoon spent burrowing in the blankets was just what I needed; it set me up with plenty of energy for a rather slow but totally delicious dinner, plus pleasant company.
Good night.
Mental Decline & Dependency/Coping With Aging Loved Ones
I've decided that while I am organizing Bob's things for the thrift shop, I might as well do a thorough cleaning job - suitcases that haven't been used for years, old hot/cold lunch bags, a humidifier we haven't used forever and ever and anyway I can't find the instructions, my old shoe storage thing in favor of Bob's much nicer shoe rack...
His shirts fit me, and I've always particularly loved the plaid flannel ones.
"His shirts fit me, and I've always particularly loved the plaid flannel ones."
I like that.
TomKitten--
The circumstances are a bit grim, but your nest building is a very healthy, positive occupation--especially when leavened with sustaining naps.
Cats--and kittens--have a sensible approach to life.
Re: Mental Decline & Dependency/Coping With Aging Loved
Tomkitten wrote:I've decided that while I am organizing Bob's things for the thrift shop, I might as well do a thorough cleaning job - suitcases that haven't been used for years, old hot/cold lunch bags, a humidifier we haven't used forever and ever and anyway I can't find the instructions, my old shoe storage thing in favor of Bob's much nicer shoe rack...
His shirts fit me, and I've always particularly loved the plaid flannel ones.
I hope wearing his shirts brings you comfort, TK.
Mental Decline & Dependency/Coping With Aging Loved Ones
Thanks, Swimpy. I think it may.
Tomkitten, I've been thinking of you. How are you doing?
Walter, TomKitten--
I hope all is going well.
**********
For the last several years Mr. Noddy has been increasingly inclined to interrupt me in casual conversation. More and more often his comments aren't terribly illuminating.
This is wearing. Very wearing.
I woke up this morning to a very picturesque snowfall. Unfortunately there has been no time for Mr. Noddy to get the snow tires on the car.
I'd planned to go to a local craft show--and will have to change those plans.
Brigit, Pig with Wings, is still cheerful with her snout to the prevailing wind.
I'm not.
Thanks for asking!
Well, kind of. At least not as bad as before. And we aren't in constant worry. Only now and then .... especially after having been at mother's (which happens once per day).
Hoping, you're getting the tires and enjoy the day, with snow and Brigit.
Walter--
I suppose getting your worries down to once a day is a considerable improvement.
Mr. Noddy is coming around to the idea that he'll be dealing with the snow tire problem tomorrow. Meanwhile I've fixed my face for an In House day. The birds--especially the woodpeckers--are offering a great deal of spectator sport.
Mental Decline & Dependency/Coping With Aging Loved Ones
Oh, Noddy - you are having a hard time. Is Mr Noddy's behavior a symptom of a new stage of decline? It must be very difficult for you to try and plan anything. I hope the birds at least, continue to be entertaining.
Walter - I hope your mini-vacation refreshed you and Mrs Walter for your dealing with your mother and aunt. Even once a day visits can be tremendously wearing, as I found with my mother, who was - to say the very least - difficult. Bob, on the other hand, must have found some kind of inner peace, even with his so badly damaged brain, because once he was in the nursing home he seemed resigned to his situation. Twice a day visits were wearing, but that was due to the emotional toll on me, not confrontations or demands from him.
I am now faced with the horrible task of doing TWO bank statements. Last month's got away from me, having no priority at all in the scheme of things. However, financial responsibility has now caught up with me and I may have to end up taking the bank's word, because I never was any good at bank statements, even one at a time. Two is overwhelming.
I'm considering doing my banking online, but I'm nervous about security. Do any of you handle your banking that way? It would certainly do away with that monthly sensation of total ineptitude when nothing matches...
I've been online banking for almost 7 years. I love it. I check my account every morning. instead of waiting untill the mionthly statement to catch any problems.
Mental Decline & Dependency/Coping With Aging Loved Ones
I think I'll consider it seriously. We have a small branch bank downstairs, so making deposits would be no problem. Actually, I would probably change most of my fairly regular deposits to automatic.
I just started banking online. Not that I haven't trusted my bank: they are super security conscious. It was that I didn't want my bills paid automatically, what with my hilarious and sporadic income - I need personal juggling power, and didn't understand that I could still have that with online banking. It's called "manual payment", at least at my bank.
Now I could kick myself for being so slow to do that.
Noddy, dear. I felt badly for you today. Didn't have any useful thing to say at the time. (Not that this is.) I know the looked-forward-to "self indulgence" of the craft show would have been like a transfusion for you.
In the future - is such a thing as a taxi a completely whacko idea?
Walter, I see what you are going through and admire your stamina (and Mrs. Walter's). Also your forbearance, re not simply throwing small pumpkins at your sister.
I do all my bank businesses online - besides printing the money myself :wink:
My mother was driven by one of the ladies staying with her to the bank, on Friday evening. (I noticed that minutes later on my computer :wink: )
So we are searching the euqivalent of $750 in the house, again ....
(Will call the nurse's office later today.)
And she told her friend that she will go to my aunt's internist that he gets her out of "the prison", home.
Mother 'only' wants back the situation like it was in former times.
My sister wanted her to be happy. I doubt she is.
(And, osso, the 'thought-police' could have arrested me a couple of times ... :wink: )
Mental Decline & Dependency/Coping With Aging Loved Ones
I posted a notice for Walter and must have deleted it, so I'll try to reconstruct it now.
I said he was very fortunate - I can't have a printing press in the apartment because the people downstairs would take exception to the noise I have to rely on government issue dollar bills. No Do-It-Yourself for me in this line.
I somehow failed to print coins, you know, ...
