Swimpy- I work with caregivers, many who have relatives in nursing homes. One of the first issues that is addressed, is that it is better for the relative to stay away, for at least a couple of weeks. This gives the resident a chance to adjust to the new surroundings.
Of course, it is a good thing for the relative to check with the staff, to see how the resident is doing. Once the visits begin, it is a good idea, to come, unannounced, at different times of the day. The relative should always check with the person on duty about any problems, concerns, etc. (but don't be a pest) Doing that, sends the message to the staff that this resident has an advocate, and can make a difference in the care that the resident gets.