Love vs. Best Friends

Best friends are supposed to be there to support you, not to tell you what to do. If they are truly your friends, they will stick around. Go for it, SqUeAkz.

Yeah, go for it. Have fun :-D

HELL YEA GO FOR IT! TELL YOUR FRIENDS "SEE YA WHEN I SEE YA" FOLLOW YOUR HEART, FOR WHEN YOUR HEART IS CONTENT YOUR LIFE WILL BE CONTENT AS WELL!

You haven't gone out with the guy yet, and you're in love with him?

How about going out - and then seeing how you feel?

Best is to be in love with your best friend.

Squeakz, aren't you fourteen? Or am I mistaken on that?

Re: Love vs. Best Friends


S'o.k., SealPoet, she already loves her best friends.

We did go out once b4 but we broke up after two days because this girl said that i was using him he heard my side and said that maybe others and or me arent ready for us to go out yet and we should just be friends. We have been friends and he said he liked me more than a friend the other day, and my friends dont think it is a good idea if i like him anymore b/c ive been liking him for a long time.

SqUeAkz, keep in mind, your best friends may be expressing some fears of losing you if you get heavily involved with this guy. However, you both have to do what feels right, but there is no harm in taking it slow to make everyone feel comfortable. Believe me, my young friend, you have lots of time.

Speaking from the prospective of someone who did not like who my best friend dated I have to say it has nothing to do, for me, with losing them to their partner. It had everything to do with the person was not good. And I am not saying not good enough for my best friend, just not good. Like a person is either good or bad and this person is bad. Evil. But my best friend would rather follow her heart and go out with him even though their was a huge consensus that he was not good.

Everyone likes to think the heart will bring you happiness and it can, but love is also blind to all evil that is hidden within a person. The first things people will want you to know is that your friends are jealous and they want your time. That is a selfish way (and some claim that is a good thing to be selfish) at looking at it. They may not be jealous they may be worried for your well being. And yes it would be nice that they stand by your decision. But if you don't take what they are saying to you seriously, and that doesn't mean doing what they say but acknowledging what they've told you with sincerity, then you are going to hurt two of your best friends. They are thinking of your well being, plus they see him in another light.

It is good to have another prospective on a situation. You are at a disadvantage because you like him and that puts you into a positive mood and makes you oblivious to the bad. They are, some what, objective in the matter.

It is very important that you take them seriously, to an extent. You don't have to agree with what they say or even do it but it is great if you listen to their concerns. I can't explain how much it hurts when you are concern with someone and they blow you off because they get mad saying you are trying to ruin their life or jealous. Just do that and you should be better off than just thinking of what your heart tells you. The ways of the heart are fraught with evil.

Not picking on you, but why is it that everyone thinks young people cannot fall in love. It is amazing that people, older, think that the younger generation makes a big deal about love. It is a big deal. Your first kiss, the first time you hold hands, the first time you fall asleep in each other's arms (or more) it is important. Everyone down plays it like it is not important. "Oh you are still young, it doesn't matter if this doesn't work out you'll have lots of time", I mean come on-- love is a serious thing and no matter how anyone sees it it does have a damaging effect on any age. It isn't easy to just move on after serious relationship, sometimes, no matter what the age. It bugs me the lack of respect that is given to young people in love.

I asked my best friends about it, they said the just dont want me to get hurt, that is the truth. Yet I dont want to lose them or this guy. Yes I know if they are my best friends theyll stick around, I just dont wanna do something with out their support.

And on another note Monkey I agree so much. Young people are capable of loving as adults or more so.

On Blue Monkey's recent posts, I agree greatly with the first one, very well said.

On the second, it is very well said too. I want to defend us who-are-more-old, at least partly. I am the one who asked about age. Sure I and we all know how much one can love and that it is especially precious when it is first love.

Love can be very rich later on too, when we develop who we are more and more fully - the pleasures and treasures and validation and challenge and excitement and on and on from that can be incredible. So we participate here with differing perspectives. Most of us get hurt in love at one point or another. We worry with special concern about the very young. Cav's rather gentle comment about taking it slow is a wise one, and not at all a put down. Slow enriches, mostly, and slow is also very smart.

P.S., I am about twice as old as Cav, he ain't so old.

Why do they think it won't work? To be worried about someone getting hurt there has to be a reason. And if their is a reason is it legit (too legit to quit, hey yay--okay dork moment sorry). Everyone in a relationship sacrifices their feelings in hope that the return is even greater, and sometimes it isn't. But that is the gamble people are willing to make. It is hard to make but sometimes it is worth the effort. You can grow stronger from damaging relationships if you take the right things from it. It is nice to have people who worry, but to worry there has to be a reason, if it is just a scare that you might get your feelings hurt that isn't worth the sweat-that is just the makings of a normal relationship.

I agree that slowness is important. You can't get the detail with speed. The only thing that is enjoyable with speed are roller costers. You don't grasp all the detail when you speed through an art museum. That is the thing you have to take your time with. Get to know the beauty of some of the works of art. Speeding past it you miss the greatness and sometimes you miss the horrible. Getting to know someone in a relationship takes careful timing, a lot of listening, a handful of understanding, sprinkle of smiling, a cup of fun, and a gallon of butterflies that should be fluttering in your stomach when you see them the first few weeks.

Ya'll made me remanence of the good times of old. I don't know if that was a good thing or not, I am smiling though, so maybe it was good.


SqUeAkz and ossobuco thanks.

I have no clue why they think it wont work, my one friend, her relationship didnt work out. So why is she being so over-protective of me! On other note, their is this girl who likes him to, she said I should back off, I said im not going to fight over a guy and she said you shouldnt b/c he mine, everyone says they or going out yet, Why did he get something for me for valetines day and not her? and why everytime when she is trying to give him a kiss he turns away and looks for me? well he has a rep. of lying to, but he swears to me and his cousin (my best friend) that he isnt lying to me.

SqUeAkz,

So have you talked to him about this other girl? Have ya'll gone out on a date yet?

There is a legit thing; lying. Becareful with those and be weary of anything. He shouldn't get mad when you ask him whether or not he is lying to you, if he knows his own reputation.

You friend is being overprotective because she doesn't want what she felt when her relationship didn't work out to be something for you to feel. She probably isn't being over protective just protective of her friend from any harm that should come to you. Take that as a complement that she loves you as a friend to want to protect you from the pain, also this is just an observation--don't have alot of information.

If you are, or do end up, dating him be observant of what he is doing around other girls. You could see he didn't want to kiss that one girl, or someone told you, but that could be a lie also. Flirting is okay but when it is done when you are around and you are being ignored because of it, there is something else afoot.

People claim to know someone when they just met them or haven't gone out very long, and they say "He/she wouldn't do that," when someone tells them something. Just when someone tells you something don't dismiss it as false, and don't believe it as real. You have to clear up those matters before they become bigger than need be.

You know, your right. He could be lying......but I sooo dont want him too be.