Bad News for the A2K Anti-Spanking Lobby

@BillRM,

BillRM wrote:

Footnote we are talking about the benefit or at least I am of mild spanking not beatings.

Maybe he will take that into consideration when he decides to GET EVEN !

David

0 Replies

@boomerang,

Quote:

If my husband hit me just a little bit as some kind of warning I'd be flipping pissed.

Hitting is hitting, some of it is terrible but all of it is bad. It is not okay to hit people to teach them a lesson

It a car was about to hit you that you did not see and your husband tackle you to push you out of the way of the car would your be thanking him or complaining about your black and blue marks?

Spanking a child to make the point loud and clear that he should stop running out into the roadway is a similar action to tackling an adult who was careless and needed to be push out of harm way as there was no time for any other action.

Footnote if it was my wife who were about to be run down by a car I would tackle her to get her out of harm way no matter how mad she might be afterward as it is my clear duty to do my best to keep her from being harm and that once more go to spanking a child for the same reason of keeping the child safe.

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@BillRM,

so basically you were just making things up - and now you're going to look it up

excellent work there Chuck

I definitely want to hear more about the anti-spanking lobbies and their classification schemes. Let us know what you discover.

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@BillRM,

Yes, I do think he would push me out of the way of an oncoming car. If he then dragged me back to the curb and hit me I'd have a real problem with that.

And, yes, I would push my child out of the way of an oncoming car. And then I'd give him a hug and tell him he needs to be more careful and always look before stepping into the road.

1 Reply

@BillRM,

BillRM wrote:

Footnote if it was my wife who were about to be run down by a car I would tackle her to get her out of harm way

would you hit her after getting her out of the way of the car?

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@boomerang,

Spanking is for the benefit and safety of a child however as an adult I would assume you knew the danger and harm of being hit by a car so no slap would be call for but that not the case of a child.

Note however if this was not a once off event and my wife had been careless before in regard to her safety in the street/roadway and almost gotten herself kill in similar manners before I would more then likely curse her out in the hope that would make an impression on her and drive the point home that once more she almost gotten us both kills.

I would also likely be holding her in may arms shaking at the same time.

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Kid's are resilient. A lot of people use "...and I turned out just fine" as a justification for the way they were parented (and how they usually parent in turn).

The thing is, more often than not, kids turn out just fine, pretty much no matter what. Really egregious bad parenting will have negative effects, for sure. Basically loving parenting with the occasional mistake usually won't cause big problems.

So it's sometimes hard to isolate the mistakes -- whether they actually are mistakes or not.

In a lot of research as an education student, then as a potential mom, then as a mom, plus my own experience as a daughter and as a mother, I've become convinced that spanking is at best unnecessary and at worst quite harmful.

I do think that in some very small percentage of situations it can be the one thing that gets through to a certain kind of kid. A very small percentage though, so small that it's close to never.

And I think even in those situations it has to do with how that kid has been parented up to that point.

Discipline is important, and starts early. But it doesn't have to involve physical punishment at all.

1 Reply

@sozobe,

Quote:

Discipline is important, and starts early. Bsdpanut it doesn't have to involve physical punishment at all.

An from my brief research to date on the subject most parents in the US disagree with you and do spank their children from time to time when they feel it is the best method.

1 Reply

@BillRM,

Quote:

Discipline is important, and starts early. Bsdpanut it doesn't have to involve physical punishment at all.

BillRM wrote:

An from my brief research to date on the subject most parents in the US disagree
with you and do spank their children from time to time when they feel it is the best method.

How ofen do the victims take revenge upon the attackers, Bill? Did u find that statistic ?

David

1 Reply

@OmSigDAVID,

Given that the 'attacker" is doing his or her best to keep the "victim' alive I would assume that by the time the "victim" had reach the point of being able to get some form of revenge the "victim' would understand the reason and motivation for the "attack".

1 Reply

@BillRM,

BillRM wrote:

Given that the 'attacker" is doing his or her best to keep the "victim' alive I would assume that by the time the "victim" had reach the point of being able to get some form of revenge the "victim' would understand the reason and motivation for the "attack".

Well, assuming that the victim has any reasonable amount of intelligence,
a few moments of creative thought shoud enable him to craft a plan,
e.g., grab a rock and smack the attacker in the head.

Of course, that might cost him his meal ticket.

0 Replies

@BillRM,

Okay.

So let's pretend that your wife was injured or suffered a minor stroke which left her with a mild cognitive impairment from which she would recover given some time.

She walks out in front of a car and you yell to warn her. She gets out of the way.

Do you then hit her in order to "teach" her not to do it again?

Childhood is like a mild cognitive impairment from which they recover given some time.

1 Reply

@boomerang,

Quote:

Childhood is like a mild cognitive impairment from which they recover given some time.

Assuming the cognitive impairment does not get them kill beforehand and once more an adult is not a 5 or 10 years old and a mild stroke does not reduce an adult to that level.

The overriding issue is to control behaviors and actions of children that had a high risk to them until their own judgment brain centers kick in.

It kind of pointless to claim that a child kill by a car that was never spank would had growth up to be a far better adjusted individual then the child kept out of the street by a spanking who did get to grow up to adulthood.

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@BillRM,

Right. The important question is, do you need to spank in order to control those behaviors?

The answer is NO.

I was never spanked, and my kid has never been spanked, and both of us are ridiculously law-abiding citizens.

1 Reply

@BillRM,

Okay Mr. Nitpick.

Let's pretend she went blind for a short time.

Would you hit her if she stepped into the street?

2 Replies

@BillRM,

BillRM wrote:

Note however if this was not a once off event and my wife had been careless before in regard to her safety in the street/roadway and almost gotten herself kill in similar manners before I would more then likely curse her out in the hope that would make an impression on her

why not spank her if you want to make an impression on her?

0 Replies

@sozobe,

Quote:

Right. The important question is, do you need to spank in order to control those behaviors?

The answer is NO.

I was never spanked, and my kid has never been spanked, and both of us are ridiculously law-abiding citizens.

That is fine an my first step to keep a child out of the street would not be a spanking and if those steps work all fine and good as a spanking should not be common or it would lose if affects in any case.

It should be held in reserve for when and if the more gentle methods fail and the behavior is such it could get the child harm or kill not as the first method in dealing with a child.

It still have an important place in a parent tool kit however.

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@boomerang,

Quote:

Let's pretend she went blind for a short time.

Would you hit her if she stepped into the street?

Given that unlike a child she would be well aware that she could be greatly harm or kill by a car and given she would be as concern or more concern that her blindness could get her kill then I would be what is the point of hitting her?

She would not as a result of a slap try harder to stay out of harm way as a result of a slap unlike a young child.

2 Replies

@hawkeye10,

The question of "do you spank/have you spanked" is quite different from the question of "is spanking an appropriate and effective discipline technique."

The research shows pretty definitively that spanking is not the most effective method for disciplining children. It damages the parent's relationship with the child, teaches the message that "might makes right," and is no more effective than other methods.

1 Reply

@BillRM,

BillRM wrote:

what is the point of hitting her?

what is the point of hitting anyone, at any time?

1 Reply

Bad News for the A2K Anti-Spanking Lobby

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