I have put my nose into things I shouldn't.
I tend not to be silent but I'm trying to not pester someone, anyone, with my views, most of the time.
Once or more, I intervened when I should have, involving my niece. When we see each other, which is rare due to geography, we talk for hours or all day, sort of peers peering from different ages, since she is now a grownup and has her own observations, never unobservant observations, even when she was little. We are always baldly straight with each other and have been since she was ... well, since she was. That's the good deal of not being the parental figure. I modulated what I told her, re age, other's privacy, but didn't fib when she asked.
So, and what? in most cases, I don't deliver my present views unless asked in some manner.
My own experience is that I listen to sharp cracks of disagreement from people who know me, and sometimes those who don't know me at all. Once or maybe twice spoken cracks, even joking that I could think what I'm thinking. More than that, let me alone.
On review of my married life, I always mentally smelled disapproval from many, but they were wrong for a long time, and I was there in the marriage, not them. After which long time, they were right after all.
In reality, it was more complicated than that.
I knew what I was doing and remained interested. I stayed with a man eleven years younger than I was (still is) for twenty three years, but who's counting. We've been 'broken up' about fifteen years and have each become more ourselves, talk once in a while. I'd never get back with him and vice versa, but I'm not sorry about the marriage. Might like to snap some years off of the total.
I figure, Chai, that you are talking about the pool thing. I can see being alert to that. I think that thread got all befuddled - what, an a2k thread?
Rightly befuddled, but you might have also been correct. Or, as mentioned, off base.
I do think community eyes matter. Sometimes community eyes get people strung up on a tree limb; sometimes community eyes identify the explosive throwers.
I guess I'd say 'report', but with dispassion.