Best we eat outside.
The cockroaches have taken
Over the kitchen.
Over the kitchen
Walls she pasted pictures of
Candy-striped wombats.
Candy-striped wombats
And polka-dot cockroaches?
Must stop drinking soon.
Must stop drinking soon
Instead will get my vodka
Intravenously
Intravenously
The deadly poison entered
The poor man's body.
The poor man's body
Is so covered in tattoos
It frightens the kids
It frightens the kids -
The film 'It', and it frightens
Mothers just as much.
Mothers just as much
As many a good watch dog
Sleep with eyes open
Mothers just as much,
she does, though now she lives in
south San Diego.
Sleep with eyes open
Or you will not know just when
The night stalker comes!
The night stalker comes
Over all giddy when he
Sees puppies asleep
Sees puppies asleep
And is relieved they are not
Chewing his slippers.
Chewing his slippers,
he quietly wished he'd stopped
at chewing his nails.
___________
At "Chewing-His-Nails",
(A small town in Devonshire)
I stopped for a pint
I stopped for a pint
Of the very best scrumpy
Devon could offer.
Devon could offer
Lashings of clotted cream, which
Is dynamite stuff
Is dynamite stuff
That you can take on a plane
As a carry on?
As a carry on,
Just like a snake in a bag,
is perfect for planes.
Is "perfect for planes"
A good way of selling those
Cosy wing covers?
Cosy wing covers
Might help to keep the birds warm
Clary's knitting some
