My child swears!

I don't know - I never have gotten in the habit of eating at the supermarket and I never taught my child to do so either. I don't think children can make the distinction between simply taking food from the supermarket, eating at the store and paying for it later on.

I have seen kids running around the store - while Mom shopped - and take food items and started eating them. I never paid too much attention to them afterwards, if indeed they gave it to Mom to pay for it or not, but it's just not a message I want to give my child.

I also have to say that my kid was never really cranky at the supermarket,
she always got something at the check-out counter where they display candy so appropriately (not) if she behaved while we were still shopping. Now that she's a teenager, she still loves to go shopping with me and she still wants some candy at the check-out counter.

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@Butrflynet,

Stop and Shop in New England - part of Giant.

http://www.adweek.com/news/advertising-branding/stop-shop-deploys-scan-it-50-stores-110890

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@Bella Dea,

Bella Dea wrote:

Eating produce, on the other hand, is another matter. You pay by volume/weight and taking food out diminishes the cost. Then you are stealing. I feel the same way about "sampling" produce before buying.

You can weigh the produce and print out the price sticker, putting it on the outside of the bag, then eats the grapes or whatever that's in the bag.

I mentioned that if a person is physically hungry to the point where it's an issue, or if you kid is that hungry, going to have a meltdown, then yes, eat something. That only makes sense.
But to open the food and just start eating because at that moment you feel like snacking? I don't think so.

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@chai2,

What signs should a judgmental bystander look for so they'll know someone is eating in the store because of a health issue or tantrum rather than just for the sheer pleasure and enjoyment of it?

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@Linkat,

Quote:

Much better at keeping them quiet. Which would you rather have a screaming kid or a pleasantly happy one, munching on a cookie?

I'd rather have a kid who learned that he couldn't have what wasn't his.
And I don't remember my kids ever screaming at the supermarket. They didn't expect a cookie so they didn't scream because they didn't get one. They knew if they wanted to pick out a treat or have a say in what we'd be having for dinner they had to behave themselves.

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I'll admit I have 'stolen' a total of something like three olives to match the individual three times I ran into complete disarray at the S----- Market olive bar.
Garlic stuffed olives and almond stuffed olives can be hard to tell apart; so can various spicy olives. This store must have one person who fills the olive pans who pays no attention to what sign is above the pan - roasted red peppers being below the almond stuffed olive sign, for example, with marinated mushrooms below the garlic stuffed olive sign - thus confusion for the buyer. It's true, I could go over to the nearby section where they slice bologna, ham, roast beef, P & P loaf and various cheeses and wait my turn in line to ask someone to identify the olives. Easier to eat one before I invest $7.50 for a container of olives.

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@Butrflynet,

Butrflynet wrote:

What signs should a judgmental bystander look for so they'll know someone is eating in the store because of a health issue or tantrum rather than just for the sheer pleasure and enjoyment of it?

Are you going to jump on the twisting words bandwagon too butfly? I'm frankly surprised at you.

Where, and I mean please feel free to point it out to me, did I say anywhere that I walk around watching to see if people are eating, and ascertain by myself that they should or should not be doing that? I don't frankly give a fat rat's ass if I pass someone eating in a store, unless they are dripping the food on me, or on the floor so someone can slip and fall. Or other specific incidences.

Why are you addressing this specifically to me, rather than cj, linkat or others that have said the same thing?

If it isn't common sense to some people that one does not GENERALLY open food packages, take the clothes off of racks and put them on, use tolietries, cleaning products etc. there's no way I can manage to explain such an obvious thing.

Excuse my french butrfly, but that was a ******* bullshit comment.

Someone said before they were glad there weren't that many "cranky" people like me. Well, I'm glad there aren't many people that go to stores and use products while standing there in the aisle.

There obviously not some line engraved in stone. This is not about "but what about if this particular thing is going on?" Don't try to push me into a corner with some specific that will always have an exceptions. If a person can't figure out this is generally not a good thing to eat food in a supermarket, well, not to to too fine a word to it, they are not very bright.

Shewolf and I just had lunch together, and we were laughing at the thought of anyone who felt like it walking around the store eating. We also talked about the horror of delaying gratification for 10 minutes, because God forbid, we want it Now.

Come on, the reason one doesn't see many people doing that, is because most people know better.

Judgemental bystander....man, you just pissed me off. Not in particular that you could call me that, but because it means you're just looking for some loophole that really isn't pertinent.

1 Reply

@chai2,

Not bullshit at all.

In your previous post you said:

Quote:

I mentioned that if a person is physically hungry to the point where it's an issue, or if you kid is that hungry, going to have a meltdown, then yes, eat something. That only makes sense.
But to open the food and just start eating because at that moment you feel like snacking? I don't think so.

You stated that you have no problem with someone eating in the store if it had to do with easing a health problem such as shaking due to not having eaten for awhile. Others have stated that there is no problem if someone opens a package to give their kid something to eat in order to stop their meltdown.

However, many disapprove of it if someone is opening a package on a lark and eating something while in the store if it was just for kicks and giggles.

My question still holds for you and anyone else who wants to respond. At the time, how does a bystander determine the reason someone has for eating an item in the store before paying for it?

If you don't care if someone else is eating in the store while you are there, why do you care if someone confesses to eating just for the pleasure of it in a store you were not in? If they're paying for the opened package whether it was to eat for health, meltdown or pleasure, what difference does it make?

I'm trying to figure out from this discussion what makes it okay in some circumstances but not in others, especially if in the end, the item is still being paid for at check out.

If I had the shakes, I'd go to the deli counter and purchase a soda, slice of ham or cheese and eat it there before resuming my shopping. It just feels wrong to me to open and eat an unpaid for package of food in a store no matter what the reason.

4 Replies

@Butrflynet,

I see you conveniently left out the phrase judgemental bystander.

If you had managed to leave just one of those 2 words out (I'll let you guess which one), you would not have gotten the reacation I gave.

Since you, in your last sentence finally admit to this feeling wrong For You in any situation, I guess you're just going to have to let your conscience by your guide.

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@Butrflynet,

Quote:

However, many disapprove of it if someone is opening a package on a lark and eating something while in the store if it was just for kicks and giggles.

My question still holds for you and anyone else who wants to respond. At the time, how does a bystander determine the reason someone has for eating an item in the store before paying for it?

What's it to them/you/whoever? Really. If I've pulled a slice of turkey out of my pre-weighed/stickered deli bag, or added a slice of swiss cheese from my cheese order and made a roll-up (I've done this many times) and someone wants to waste their energy determining if I'm a good person or a bad person then that's their problem not mine. I won't get arrested for shoplifting/stealing because the full purchase price is already marked on the bag and it doesn't fail my mirror in the morning test.

I see people eating in grocery stores all the time. Sometimes it's from the store trying to sell you something by giving away free tastes, sometimes it's from people eating out of an open cookie/cracker box, sometimes it's a slice of pizza from the adjacent deli. I don't give it a second thought. I certainly don't wonder if they're have already or are going to pay for the item. That's between them, the store, and their mirror.

Quote:

It just feels wrong to me to open and eat an unpaid for package of food in a store no matter what the reason.

Ok, then don't do it. It would compromise your sense of right and wrong. It would fail your mirror test. But being the judgmental bystander and spending energies on someone else isn't good for your blood pressure and has no impact on their well being whatsoever.

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@Butrflynet,

Butrflynet wrote:

It just feels wrong to me to open and eat an unpaid for package of food in a store no matter what the reason.

not only that - but there are signs all over stores here that say "no snacking"

there may be different standards of appropriate behaviour in the States, but people do get approached by store staff here if they are seen 'snacking'

it's a no-go

I also wonder about the comments about screaming kids in grocery stores. Maybe that's an American thing? You don't see/hear that here. Either parents are making sure their kids are ok before they get to the store, or they are better behaved in general, I really don't know. But it's not something you experience here - doesn't matter what time you go into the store. I've certainly seen kids sleeping in carts, but screaming and/or running around unattended in stores? nope.

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@ehBeth,

Did I mention Gino Vanelli is Canadian?

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@ehBeth,

The only time I've seen similar signs is at the bulk bins at Whole Foods. They suggest asking a clerk for a sample rather than sampling yourself.

Correction... I've also seen them at salad bars because the salad isn't weighed until you get to the checkout.

I once made a comment to the checkout clerk as she scanned an empty bakery bag that held a bagel before my daughter started eating it. She shrugged and said, "No problem. We see it all the time."

1 Reply

@Butrflynet,

Butrflynet said

What signs should a judgmental bystander look for so they'll know someone is eating in the store because of a health issue or tantrum rather than just for the sheer pleasure and enjoyment of it?

Bloody hell darlin,' if that's your idea of sheer pleasure and enjoyment you need to get out a bit more.

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@JPB,

JPB wrote:

They suggest asking a clerk for a sample rather than sampling yourself.

You wouldn't see that here. I can literally count the places where you can get samples within driving distance of home or work.

I wonder if it has to do with different standards around food safety. Our laws are food labelling etc are pretty stringent as well - restaurants are required to post signs at the front door to indicate when they last passed an inspection, and at what level they passed.

Truthfully, the thought that people would eat in stores grosses me out a bit. Touching carts, shelves, cans - putting food in their mouths - touching other things in the stores. It's gag-inspiring.

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@ehBeth,

I think it's probably a relatively new phenomena here. My mother would have been mortified if she'd seen me nibbling on my ham and cheese roll up. I would have shrugged at her mortification. Grocery stores here encourage kids to eat. If you order sliced cheese at the deli they ask you if you want an extra (gratis) slice for your child. I was surprised at first and said they should add it to the scale and include it in my purchase. "No. No problem. We're happy to do it."

1 Reply

@izzythepush,

izzythepush wrote:

Butrflynet said

What signs should a judgmental bystander look for so they'll know someone is eating in the store because of a health issue or tantrum rather than just for the sheer pleasure and enjoyment of it?

Bloody hell darlin,' if that's your idea of sheer pleasure and enjoyment you need to get out a bit more.

omg izzy, that's the best answer yet!

I just realized I've been dancing around this sacred cow of not being able to question/dispute of worth of particular pleasures.

Yeah, I guess if opening a bag of chips at the store and eating them mindlessly while loading up your cart with more things you can eat is the most pleasurable thing in your day, and you simply can't envision life going on without enjoying this "pleasure" instantly, well then, have at it.

1 Reply

@ehBeth,

ehBeth wrote:

Truthfully, the thought that people would eat in stores grosses me out a bit. Touching carts, shelves, cans - putting food in their mouths - touching other things in the stores. It's gag-inspiring.

I.....I'm starting to feel validated this morning.

ehBeth, I was just about to post just that, but figured I'd get jumped on by some saying "oh, a few germs won't kills you"

When I get home from running any kind of errands, home from work, home from gardening, etc etc. pretty much the first thing I do when I arrive is wash my hands.
I don't consider that overkill. I've been touching all sorts of surfaces, and much of the time, as soon as I get home, I like to grab something to eat. I like to think that all our mothers taught us to wash our hands before eating.

I notice they have these wipes stationed near the shopping carts now, so people can wipe down the handles before using. Personally I don't use them, because I'm not going to be putting my hands near my mouth. I don't know if those wipes are silly or not, but they are silly to me.

Food samples? Rarely rarey do that. I definately don't take that piece of cheese that's sitting under some dome with toothpicks stuck in it.

1 Reply

@chai2,

chai2 wrote:

I like to think that all our mothers taught us to wash our hands before eating.

if people are going to eat in stores and keep touching things, I'd also like them to wash their hands before they touch anything else in the store someone else might touch

grossness

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@chai2,

Quote:

and you simply can't envision life going on without enjoying this "pleasure" instantly, well then, have at it.

I don't get this part. Why is it either/or? Why is it anything? It violates your sense of right and wrong. Ok. I accept that. It's not something you would do except under duress. Ok. That's fine too. It's not something that BFN would do under any circumstances. That's cool. It's simply different lines in the sand. I don't get why there has to be a judgement made on why someone else is doing something that you wouldn't do.

"If... you simply can't envision... well, then have at it" Really? Why is this something that has anything to do with anyone besides the person doing the eating and the store. Why the conditional "if"?

1 Reply

My child swears!

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