Interesting Relationship Dilemma.

just from reading your answer, it appears to me you have some personal self esteem issues and think things that are irrelevant somehow make you better than others....like you are on some fictional pedestal. im just assuming here, but do you really feel like your life sucks or you hate yourself? do you find yourself trying to convince yourself otherwise by trying to appear intelligent and superior to others in hopes that if you convince others of that, that you might actually begin feel like that?....if so, its not going to happen. the only thing that will happen is people attacking you back and thinking you are an A-hole, in turn causing you to hate yourself more. havent you ever heard the saying "when you point your finger, four others are pointing back at you"?

I am the mediator in this discussion.
The Question is whether or not it is disrespectful to either party to have either a unknown man/woman in the house while the other partner is not there. The one partner has been friends with this person for awhile but the other partner knows nothing about him/her. So the question, is it disrespectful to allow the third party to be in the house while the other partner is not there?

The one partner who does not know the third party asked their partner to have the third party leave until they could arrive. The partner said that they were ok with the third party being there as long as they were there. The partner was not ok with the third party being there and expressed that verbally. It took the partner about 45 minutes to get home from work. When they come home they found the third party still there, laying halfway on a mattress sitting in the living room in the house. Along with the second party laying on the couch and a family member having a conversation. The first party asked the third party could you leave multiple times. The third party doesn't move and looks at the second party in defiance of the the first parties request. That's when the first party walked over to the third party to help him off the floor. The first party went to go grab his arm and the third party moved away and requested not to be touched while he was getting up. The first party then explains it's reasoning multiple times as to why the first party requested the third party to leave while they were taking their time to grab their belongings. The first party Feels upset because the third was still present when they got home after they already requested for him to leave 45 mins prior to all of this. The First party feels the second party was not backing them because they had to ask the third party multiple times to leave the house. The first party feels the second party was verbally backing the third party instead of them by not telling the third party to leave when the first party requested it multiple times.


The Second party told the first party that they told the third party that the first party did not want them there until they were there so the first party could meet them. The third party then left after being told what the first party told the second party 5 minutes into the 45 before he arrived home. and said he was going to the store and brought back an item requested by the fourth party. When the third party returned they were present for only fifteen minutes before the first party arrived home. The Second party was planning on going to the emergency room and used that as an excuse to leave without hurting the feelings of the third party by telling them they had to leave again. The second party was waiting on the fourth party to finish a task they had before they left for the emergency room. The second party has known the third party going on 8 years. They have never dated and were just friends. The third party is also married. The third party drove five hours to get to where the second party lives to see the second party and the mother of the second party who was a few weeks deceased but the third party was unaware of the death until arrival.