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Mon 11 Oct, 2010 03:35 pm
hie im a lady aged 21years and i have a 3 yr old kid with a 28yr old guy who engaged me recently ,we have been dating for 4years since my first lover left me o look for work and he called me for a few weeks then he stopped so i had to move on with my life cos he did nt bother about me .life went on and my kids dad we were so in love until he started beating me when he is drunk for no reason he has no respect for my parents cos he used to beat me infont of them and he insults me about my parents that hurted me so badly and now he sometimes threatens to kill/hurt me if i leave him he says i cant leave him we were meant to be ,i have grown out of love because he is now an alcholic,liar,cheater and the bad thing he does not want to change his drinking habit he says you found me drinking and it will never change a thing ,from back i have tried calling it quits but he threatens he will change or hurt me now we engaged and planning to get married next year ,here comes the bigger problem i cant handle the my first lover jus communicated with me and we even met the fact is that where there is love no one cant separete,we seem to love each other more and more he even proposed me the first day we met he does not have a kid and he still single i love him very much he calls me always and he is the only person who knows me better than anyone ,i have tried to end things with my fiance but he says never what must i do im now caught in the middle please heeeeeeeeeeeeeelp m
@hotsoup,
Well number one advice is that you DEFINITELY do not want to marry an abusive alcoholic. Your first responsibility is to your child and that is not the life you want for him/her. You don't need to go to your first lover but you need to get away from your fiance. If you don't have anywhere else to go you need to seek help from a local women's shelter or whatever social services you have in your area. If you can't find the courage to do it for yourself you have to find it for your child.
Gather up your important papers: birth certificates, drivers license, any other ID, a small bag of clothes and call the nearest shelter in the nearest large town. They may come and get you. Or at least they will tell you how to get out of this very dangerous situation. You could also call the police and ask them to take you there. YOU must line this up.
This situation has put MANY people in danger, including your parents. You must tell the police he may harm them, too. You need to protect your child.
This other fellow is a distraction and this is preventing you from thinking straight. Concentrate on saving yourself and your child NOW. You can deal wth him later.
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