What future plans do you have for any journey?
That’s kind of what I meant. I used to think I could plan this journey, that I knew the path to where I wanted to go, and that I could avoid any major catastrophe along the way. I assumed it would be much like how you describe your life, that I would have a great career, a family, travel the world and have it all blend happily together until I arrived at the destination in life I believed possible.
I thought that each step along the way would build upon the the last one and get easier all the time as I neared the golden years of my retirement and my final destination. That’s how they said it should work. The secular world, and the religious too, agreed that is how it should work.
That’s not how the journey turned out To be though. As long as I stayed focused on the destination I was aiming for, It took me through every disaster, disillusionment and disappointment that I Feared the most. I felt like Sisyphus forever rolling that ******* giant rock up the hill only to have it roll down on the other side.
I tried to see myself in the best possible light, saw myself as strong and able to meet this challenge, that these were merely tests of my resolve and I could be victorious over them. The truth of the matter turned out to be less flattering. My strength turned out to be mere stubbornness and the challenges were just signs telling me that I was off the path. I was a slow learner. I had to take every detour and dead end before I began to wake up.
So now I do much less planning for my journeys and try to pay more attention to the signs.
Sorry, I get carried away with metaphor sometimes. Only journey I’m doing any planning for is the drive to Colorado and finish fixing the airplane I crashed last year. I may never fly it again but it doesn’t feel right to leave it sitting un-airworthy. No certain time, just whenever it gets too hot here.
Happy trails CI