Three couples.

Three couples, an elderly couple, a middle-aged couple, and a young newly married couple wanted to join the church.

The Vicar said, "We have special requirements for new parishioners.
You must abstain from sex for a four-week period".

The couples agreed and returned at the end of the four weeks.

The Vicar went to the elderly couple first and asked, "Were you able to abstain from sex for the four weeks?"

The old man replied, "No problem at all, Vicar."
"Congratulations! Welcome to the church!" said the Vicar.

The Vicar then went to the middle-aged couple and asked, "Well, were you able to abstain from sex for the four weeks?"

The man responded, "The first week was easy, the second week was not too bad, but the third and fourth weeks I had to sleep on the couch several nights."

"Congratulations! Welcome to the church," said the Vicar.

He then approached the newlywed couple and asked, "Were you able to abstain from sex for the four weeks?"

"No, Vicar.
We were not able to go without sex for four weeks," the young man said, sadly.
"What happened?" enquired the Vicar.
"Well, we made it through three whole weeks, then my wife was reaching for a can of paint on the top shelf and dropped it.
When she bent over to pick it up, I was overcome with lust and took advantage of her right there."

"Well," the Vicar stated."You realise this means you will not be
welcome in our church."

"We know," said the young man shaking his head, "We're not welcome at the hardware store anymore either."