Actually, I am used to people going all funny when they see real Chinese food! Lots of people react with horror to stuff like chooks' feet staring up at you.
My friend is a strong animal rights person, and I admire her for it.
I likely wouldn't have wanted to sit and eat with crabs and crays who were about to be dinner staring at me. I mean, I would have loved to watch them, because they are fascinating, but I would find it a bit ooky, too.
And, as I said, this responsibility thing isn't RATIONAL, that's the point of the whole thread, not to bash a kind and wonderful friend...she just got to conniption point.
The wonder is it seems to be pretty normal to FEEL responsible, even though we know we're not!
For example, I can remember a good friend, A, having a terrible fight with another good friend's ( B's) husband at a dinner party of mine....I felt awful, and it actually made the friendship with B finish, because he and I already had problems and he went nutso at me after that night (though I wasn't even in the room when it happened) and it made it just too hard.
A feels responsible for that, but the husband was a nasty piece of work, and they were both fairly plastered, so I don't think any blame attaches to her at all. I had always wanted to give him what for too, but restrained myself for the sake of my friendship with B.