My wife is unhappy:

Let me guess.

This guy is someone going to school with her.

Which is why the subject of her taking a semester off to gain some extra time with you hasn't been addressed.

So Greendoggy - how come YOU are not making your wife "dripping wet" and doing things with YOUR tongue to her?

Sounds like the WOW has gone from your marriage.
Sounds like priorities were misplaced for a while.
Sounds like you are coming off as needy and insecure, cheap and distracted - instead of confident, sexy and loving - and that's boring to a woman.

Get a new haircut, new shirt and take your wife out to dinner. Stop all this bullshit about there being no money or no time. Your MARRIAGE is in trouble - BIG trouble!!! Wake up!!! You need to take some action NOW - or she's gone.

Sully, Greendoggy last replied in March....and I'm wondering whether or not you were under the influence (of anything) when you wrote that

You're kidding, That's your reply to this persons traumatic problem...is his grammar???? You gave no thought to this gentleman's situation, accept to critique him on his writing. Very sad.....

Greendoggy and blueshield6630 Life just does not seem to be fair does it. I do not understand why people behave like they do but both men and women do the same types of things. It seems down right evil does'nt it.
The sad truth is [at least I think so] is that we all have a different neurology and psychology and we can not help it for being who we are. [at least not completely]
Just continue being who you are and try the things that you think should be tried and I hope for the two of you the best of luck. If it does not work out a new door will open and if you are both sincere as you have come across things will change for you and I hope for the best.

The reality of day to day marriage with a husband who ignores you can lead some women to do things they wouldn't ordinarily. Other men are so alluring because you don't have to wash their smelly underwear, or defend spending habits to them. The "grass is greener" theory... Affairs cheat the cheaters - because they fool themselves into thinking that THIS guy would be different.... It will be romance 24/7 with him... He would never talk to me that way...

You have been with her through the birth of your children, through all kinds of things people face in REALITY... you have been her constant and her guy to depend on. This guy is dipping in with texts and fantasies and a cock. You've got one. Use it.

You could drop her for cheating - which she likely is...
or
You could give this guy a run for his money and at the same time - remind you and your wife of why you're together.

Start texting her once in a while at work - once in a while from the next room. Start some traditions with your children and your wife - strengthen family bonds. Take her out for a really nice meal and talk about when you met - when you conceived your children...

Stop by work to take her to lunch...send flowers. Reach out in the middle of the night and hold her hand... I'm pulling for you.

I mean - your home is under assault - but you've got an edge. You're in bed with her every night - you are the father of her children - you KNOW her. Marshall your resources - and go to war.

That's great advise, Lash and I hope the original poster will come back to read it.

Yes I do agree that it seems to be wiser than what I could come up with.
I do question this though. [This guy is dipping in with texts and fantasies and a cock. You've got one. Use it.]
Who knows maybe I am wrong but should you have used this type of language.
I am only questioning it.
Could you have have used a different language that would of hit home with a broader audience? I am not saying that you did wrong. You are very wise!

Whatever, he didn't listen.

I'm not the only one who has written many heartfelt responses to relationship threads over the years that is tried by people who have never heard of paragraphs, some posts being many inches long.

We often respond to people with poor english skills sans comment on that aspect. In this case, the person has quite good grammar, but does sentence blanketing. I guess this is news that this is a shutoff for some. Some of us have to be quite interested to do the work, yet again. I was actually trying to help, in my way. I'm sorry I never got back to post more on the issues.

After you have helped, or tried to help, many dozens of people on this site, then I'll note your sadness.

been married for 20 years. been there many times. it always falls back on the man, the so called spiritual leader of the family. look deep inside and find the character defects that have pushed your wife away, and has caused you trouble with other people and situations. try the 12 steps for emotions - you would be surprised at how it will hit home. to feel your wifes love bank, you have to bury your ego and forget about self - shut up, listen and learn from your wife, know her heart and you will win her heart.

Have you ever tried "praying" to God about it?
He can make things happen for you.

Really? How do you know "he" can make things happening?
Facts only please!