What exactly do you say in a rememberance speech?

Sounds perfect Abbey! When cancer took my mother; we celebrated as much as we mourned as well, for that's what she wanted. Say your goodbyes, but she'll live on in your heart forever. Don't be afraid to take time out and cry. You and your sister were very blessed to have such wonderful sisters. God bless you both!
(((((AbbieMcKenly)))))

I love the songs your uncle picked out, Abbie, and I really like your words. I know what you mean about 3 days seeming like forever. Sometimes waiting for the funeral process seems like an eternity. I remember thinking, "Can't we just get on with it?" when someone close to me died. It was as if I couldn't feel that they were really resting at peace until after the services.

It sounds like there will be hundreds of people there to help celebrate Lilia's life on Thursday. I imagine there will be more than a few of us standing beside you in spirit as well.

Your uncle sounds like a very sound and competent man, Abbie.

U can discuss Lilia with him.





David

Yeah he's great.
He's a therapist so he's had a lot more experience with how people react to stuff and everything, so it's been really nice to have him around, he was a lot of help to Lilia when she was with us too. He lives 4 or 5 hours away in London though so we don't see him all that much normally.
I'm glad he's here at the moment and

Sorry i meant to finish that, but we were going over my grandparents so i had to post it as it was.
I'm glad he's here at the moment and that, because it means my dad can talk to people, cause my mum is staying with my nan for a few days.

That 's wonderful; u can enjoy the company of both
your dad and your uncle for a while.

I believe in and support hedonism: the philosophy
that joy is good and pain is bad.
With a vu toward being as happy as possible,
I suggest that u also enjoy the company of
your little brother n sister; play with them,
and be happy with them. Obviously, u can talk about Lilia with them.
There will never be a limit on that.





David

Hey Abbie...

you're doing great girlie. Lilia would be very proud of you.

Take care and let us know how you are.

<I'm in the SouthWest of England... reckon you may be up there in the North - keep warm young lady, there's more snow heading in>

x

We ALL owe it to ourselves
to fill our minds with JOY and BEAUTY as much as possible.





David

Nope, not a Northerner.
We live in cornwall, but for the last few years, the a lot of our time had been spent up North in various hospitals. And in Exeter and lots in Great Ormond Street (London).
Like i think it was Mame asked, i was just going to update you all on how it went.
In a nutshell, it was perfect.
There were far more people than we expected, loads of them had to stand around the edge. My brother didn't read the poem in the end, just my sister, he was too upset.
My uncle gave a brilliant speech, had the whole room in tears from the start. My mum got as far as about two sentances before she couldn't do anymore, but of course everyone understood, and my aunt finished it for her.
My dad didn't have a speech he just thanked everyone for coming, reminded everyone what Lilia was like, played a video of her playing with May. Then he started handing out milkshakes, slightly unexpected by nice nonw the less. Some supermarkets have got to be compleately out of milkshake right now.
I finished my speech, and more. I think i went blabbing on for about 5 minutes. I don't even know what i said.
Some of Lilia's friends from the hospital read her a lullaby. That was hard because i remember Lil reading a similar one to a little boy who passed away in September, so it was wierd to hear it read to Lilia.
The music was perfect for it, i didn't like the last song but hey.
The coffin was lovely, it had "Princess Lilia" on it in black and it was Lilac.
Her class from school released a while dove outside, and 10 while ballons with messages in. That was really nice.

On the other hand, the burial was absolutly aweful. Just imagining her in a box underground was not nice. We were going to get her cremated but couldnt handel the thought of her getting burned, i think we'd have perfered that now. But it feels like Lilia can finially rest and go wherever now.

We don't have a head stone yet, just a crappy little wooden cross, but we'll have it sometime in the new year.

I gotta go now, we have to got for a meal with everyone.
10 hours and 20 minutes till this crappy year is over.
Cannot wait.
"Happy" new bloody year. I hope this one's better.

Hope you all have a good time tonight, we're having about 50 people over ours, not sure how that's going to work out... Should be interesting.

It does sound perfect, abbie, and I completely understand the emotions of the burial. I was comforted by the thought that my mother's body may have been buried but her spirit lived on in all of us she had touched in her life. Lilia touched so many lives in her few years -- it is my true belief that she lives on in those lives, especially those she was so close to, such as you and your family.

Allow yourself to feel however you feel in any given moment. The past few days have been a whirlwind of planning/waiting/planning/waiting/planning/implementing and even performing. You may feel yourself awash with emotions over the next few days. It's all perfectly normal.

Hugs to you as you start 2010.