A woman who truly loves you will see you for who you really are and that is what they will love about you. If someone falls in love with the real "brahmin" they will not reject you because of your bank account or IQ. Most women want a kind, emotionally generous man who works to the best of his ability and encourages them to be the best they can be in whatever they chose to do. You are starting your search with a lot of negativity, try thinking in more positive terms.
I came from an urban wealthy family, my husband came from what most would call the most middle of middle class and grew up in a rural area. The sort of work he did (when we met) guaranteed he would never be rich. We've been together for over 15 years. When we first met I made more money than he did, it was never an issue for us because neither of us are materialistic. We spent the first three years of our relationship living on very little because we were creating a business. We do
have similar intellectual pursuits and our values and politics are the same - that has been very important. In someways I am smarter than him and in other ways he is smarter than me, it works to our advantage. I think how we work as team is what is important. I would say do not rule anyone out based on your generalizations - you might rule out the perfect woman before you even get to know each other.
The best way to cure inexperience and naivety is to get out in world and get experience. You might want to read a book called Men are from Mars, Women are from Venus
. It's a good overview of how the different sexes communicate. Even if you mess up a lot in the beginning, every experience will make you a wiser and better person.