Wife and Intimacy!!

My wife and I are having marital issues. It has been a rocky 10 months. We have been married for 15 years and together for 21 years. The past year my wife has decided she loves me but is not in love with me. It started there and escalated to her fooling around with another guy no intercourse just some kissing. We almost got divorced and she got diagnosed with Major Depression. She is done seeing her psychiatrist on a weekly basis and now is seeing a psychologist weekly and she is probably seeing him around 1 1/2 months or so. She tells me she loves me and wants to be with me but is not emotionally connected to me. She has a lot of anger, pain, and etc. penned up inside of her directed at me. She felt I was mistreating her the last couple of years. I ignored her, made fun of her, treated her like a kid, and she felt unequal. I see some of her points but I am a sarcastic person in general and I have not changed since we have met. I am not trying to saying I am right.
Right now we are in a stage where we are going day by day and trying to be good parents and good to each other. She is working on it with her counselor. She is working on letting her wall/barrier down so she can re-attach to me emotionally. Right now she just can not be sexual with me. We use to have a great sex life. It is very frustrating but also very concerning as well. I am concerned with, what happens if counseling does not work? Then what? Divorce? I don't want that.
Also, how long is enough? She has been in counseling for 1 1/2 months which is very short since she throws around being hurt the last 3-5 years.
If anyone has some thoughts, I would appreciate it. I am trying to keep busy to keep my mind off of it but it is very tough. Please help!! I love my wife and family and need help!