Hi Missy, and let's see... I did not ask pal why he didn't plan to bring his wife, because he's already made it clear that he plain doesn't like her.
Why does he stay with her? (I Have asked that!) "She's a good mother."
Yeah, well, in my world, this is NOT a good reason to live with a person for the rest of your life. I've hinted a bit strongly that that's what I think, and Pal is smart enough to understand my comments.
In fact, I've told him quite clearly, in the past, that if he doesn't love her, he should leave her, and find someone he Does Love. (This would make me very happy for him.)
I don't think it's fair, honestly, for him or for her, to "Stay together for the sake of the children." Kids know all about their parents' Real relationships, and I think it sets a poor example for kids when they know their parents actually don't like one another.
Still, it's not in my power to make my old friend live his life in a way that I think is correct, or happier. He has to do it himself, and want happiness himself.
Worst of all, this is not the only couple I know who are staying together "for the children." The kids know it, learn it, and grow up to live it.