E Mails From My Right Wing Buddy

... in the position of posing as a national threat.

INTERNET WARNING


If you get an email titled "Nude photo of Nancy Pelosi,"
don't open it....


It contains a nude photo of Nancy Pelosi.

I saw an interesting article on how the Muslim population used to identify with the Republican party.

The Republican party has pretty much become the party of social conservatism.

History 101

For those that don't know about history ... Here is a condensed version:

Humans originally existed as members of small bands of nomadic hunters/gatherers. They lived on deer in the mountains during the summer and would go to the coast and live on fish and lobster in the winter.

The two most important events in all of history were the invention of beer and the invention of the wheel. The wheel was invented to get man to the beer. These were the foundations of modern civilization and together were the catalyst for the splitting of humanity into two distinct subgroups:

1. Liberals, and
2. Conservatives.

Once beer was discovered, it required grain and that was the beginning of agriculture. Neither the glass bottle nor aluminum can were invented yet, so while our early humans were sitting around waiting for them to be invented, they just stayed close to the brewery. That's how villages were formed.

Some men spent their days tracking and killing animals to B-B-Q at night while they were drinking beer. This was the beginning of what is known as the Conservative movement.

Other men who were weaker and less skilled at hunting learned to live off the conservatives by showing up for the nightly B-B-Q's and doing the sewing, fetching, and hair dressing. This was the beginning of the Liberal movement.

Some of these liberal men eventually evolved into women. Those became known as girlie-men. Some noteworthy liberal achievements include the domestication of cats, the invention of group therapy, group hugs, and the concept of Democrat voting to decide how to divide the meat and beer that conservatives provided.

Over the years conservatives came to be symbolized by the largest, most powerful land animal on earth, the elephant. Liberals are symbolized by the jackass.

Modern liberals like imported beer (with lime added), but most prefer white wine or imported bottled water. They eat raw fish but like their beef well done. Sushi, tofu, and French food are standard liberal fare. Another interesting evolutionary side note: most of their women have higher testosterone levels than their men. Most social workers, personal injury attorneys, politicians, bureaucrats, journalists, dreamers in Hollywood and group therapists are liberals. Liberals invented the designated hitter rule because it wasn't fair to make the pitcher also bat.


Conservatives drink domestic beer, mostly Bud or Miller. They eat red meat and still provide for their women.. Conservatives are big game hunters, rodeo cowboys, lumberjacks, construction workers, firemen, medical doctors, engineers, corporate executives, athletes, members of the military, airline pilots and generally anyone who works productively. Conservatives who own companies hire other conservatives who want to work for a living.

Liberals produce little or nothing. They like to govern the producers and decide what to do with the production. Liberals believe Europeans are more enlightened than Americans That is why most of the liberals remained in Europe when conservatives were coming to America . They crept in after the Wild West was tamed and created a business of trying to get more for nothing..

Here ends today's lesson in world history:

It should be noted that a Liberal may have a momentary urge to angrily respond to the above before forwarding it.

A Conservative will simply laugh and be so convinced of the absolute truth of this history that it will be forwarded immediately to other true believers and to more liberals just to tick them off.

And there you have it.

Let your next action reveal your true self .

I want one!!!!
Nokia has finally designed a cell phone for nervous white people who need to make a cell phone call while in Jacksonville, East Saint Louis, New Orleans, Memphis, South Chicago, South Dallas, Houston, L.A., Miami Detroit, Washington, D.C., parts of New York City, Buffalo, Oakland, and parts of Atlanta

Quote:

GH Bush is considered a hero by Muslims (saved Kuwait and all)

I had forgotten all of this. Do you remember when the senators were giving Ollie North such a bad time? This brings it all into perspective doesn't it? Have a great day.



Do = you remember 1987........

Thought you
might be interested in this forgotten bit of
information..........
It was 1987! At a lecture the other day they were playing an old news video of
Lt.Col. Oliver North testifying at the Iran-Contra hearings during the Reagan
Administration.

There was Ollie in front of God and country getting the third degree, but what he said was stunning!

He was being drilled by a
senator; 'Did you not recently spend close to $60,000 for a home security system?'

Ollie replied, 'Yes, I did, Sir.'

The senator continued, trying to get a laugh out of the audience, 'Isn't that just a little
excessive?'

'No, sir,' continued Ollie.

'No? And why not?' the senator asked.

'Because the lives of my family and I were threatened, sir.'

'Threatened? By whom?' the senator questioned.

'By a terrorist, sir' Ollie answered.

'Terrorist? What terrorist could
possibly scare you that much?'

'His name is Osama bin Laden, sir' Ollie
replied.

At this point the senator tried to repeat the name, but couldn't pronounce it, which most people back then probably couldn't. A couple of people laughed at the attempt. Then the senator continued. Why are you so
afraid of this man?' the senator asked.

'Because, sir, he is the most
evil person alive that I know of', Ollie answered.


'And what do you recommend we do about him?' asked the senator.

'Well, sir, if it was up to me, I would recommend that an assassin team be formed to eliminate him and his men from the face of the earth..'

The senator disagreed with this approach, and that was all that was shown of the clip.



By the way, that senator was Al Gore!

Also:

Terrorist pilot Mohammad Atta blew up a bus in Israel in 1986. The Israelis captured, tried and imprisoned him. As part of the
Oslo agreement with the Palestinians in 1993, Israel had to agree to release
so-called 'political prisoners.'

However, the Israelis would not release
any with blood on their hands, The American President at the time, Bill Clinton, and his Secretary of State, Warren Christopher, 'insisted' that all prisoners be
released.

Thus Mohammad Atta was freed and eventually thanked us by flying an airplane into Tower One of the World Trade
Center ..... This was reported
by many of the American TV networks at the time that the terrorists were first
identified.
It was censored in the US from all later
reports.


If you agree that the American public should be made aware of this fact, pass this on.

Do Not Break - it is 6 years strong
This has not been broken since 9/11/01, please keep it going...
This has been kept alive and moving since 9/11. In memory of
all those who perished this morning; the passengers and the pilots on the
United Air and AA flights, the workers in the World Trade Center and the
Pentagon, and all the innocent bystanders. Our prayers go out to the friends and
families of the deceased.

Send this to at least 10 people to show your support

PLEASE DON'T BREAK IT !!!!!!