Should I Tell My Ex-wife that I am Going to Court for Visitation?

no.

umm... do your son a favor and don't let him know that the reason you want to establish contact is to reduce your child support payments.

Why threaten? Just take her to court to let them decide how to manage visitation in best interest of the child.

Take her to court and get a court order forget talking to her just do it.

With a court order she is stop from doing a on and off game playing and why settle just for vistation?

I see if there is nothing in your past that you should have a say in the child upbringing as a matter of course.

It might be easier to answer had you not brough the money into your post. What is important here? The money or the child?

It depends.

Are you going to say

"Look bitch, I'm taking your ass to court, you'd better get ready cause you're going down."

Or are you going to say

"I really miss (insert kid's name here). It kills me that you won't let me see him. I really wish we could work this out but since we can't I wanted you to know that I've hired an attorney to get visitation. I miss him so much. I need to see him."

If you intend to tell her the first way, don't. Just let the court serve papers and get ready for a brawl.

If you intend to tell her the second way she just might decide that working out an agreement with you might serve all of you best.

If you intend to tell her the second way she just might decide that working out an agreement with you might serve all of you best.
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A mother who is willing to harm her child by keeping him or her from having a relationship with his/her father is hardly fit parent to begin with, once more assuming that there is no good reason not to keep the father away.

I would had first off would have done all lawyers could had done to share in the raising of the child with a share custody arrangement not just visitation and it is odd that child support would had been decided in court and that visitation rights would not have been decided at the same time.

There is more to this story then we are being told in my opinion
.

Why do you think that's odd? Happens all the time.

Most likely you will see a family court mediator.

You DO need to get this formalized.

PS - Leave the money issue out of the conversation. I know you feel that you have some rights, because you are paying for them. But really, you must show that you are able to have a quality visitation with your child. This is not a "get back" to the ex.

This is about having a relationship with your child that benefits the child, NOT you.

I thank all of you for giving me a chance to read all views on this matter.