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divorce with a prenup

 
 
Reply Thu 12 Nov, 2009 10:37 am
Yes, I signed it. Now 8 years later I realize that I have no savings or retirement accounts (home raising children) and nothing is in my name and if HE DECIDES to leave me I am really in a bind. At 44. Oh my Goodness how could I have EVER been so stupid? I will not get anything other than half of the furnishings in our home. No alimony. My husband is in the top 1% in income. He has been increasingly mean and starts fights all the time. I think he is trying to force me to divorce him. My life is taking care of the children (90% me, 10% him) and cleaning the house. Our daughter is having school refusal; she is also affected by how my husband treats me. He openly said in front of her (she is 7) "The only job a woman can do is a bl** job". Yes, this is my life. I want to change it but I need an exit strategy. Any advice is gratefully received. Thank you.
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Type: Question • Score: 3 • Views: 3,948 • Replies: 8
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Gala
 
  1  
Reply Thu 12 Nov, 2009 10:48 am
@KoratMommy,
do you by any chance know the married woman who's having an affair with the much younger married guy from work who has a bunch of children under the age of 4?
0 Replies
 
dyslexia
 
  1  
Reply Thu 12 Nov, 2009 11:05 am
@KoratMommy,
koratmommy, rest assured there are lots of other jobs a woman can do.
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BillRM
 
  1  
Reply Thu 12 Nov, 2009 11:14 am
@KoratMommy,
If this is real, the first step is taking the copy of the pre-nup to a lawyer to see how watertight it is or is not.

Second step by whatever means needed begin to siphon household funds into an account only your have control of and you know about.

Even if your pre-nup is iron tight that would not stop a judge, as far as I know, from granting you child support and perhaps the used of the family home until the children reach adulthood. Once more, see a good lawyer.

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BillRM
 
  1  
Reply Thu 12 Nov, 2009 04:17 pm
Oh if you are able to put up with the man for 10 years at least you should be able to drawn SS benefits on retirement under his earning record.

You do need a lawyer here and would not be all that surprise if it turn out you are a lot better off then you think and he is not going to be happy as a result.
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sullyfish6
 
  1  
Reply Thu 12 Nov, 2009 04:42 pm
Pre-nups are usually to protect the man's business or family fortune.

But withholding child support and alimony - for a little while so you can go back to school - should not be included in a pre-nup.

What you WILL get is help raising the kids and some kind of help to get you where you can support yourself.

Plan on your standard of living to drop.

If he's that bad, it seems to be a fair trade.

BillRM
 
  1  
Reply Thu 12 Nov, 2009 04:55 pm
@sullyfish6,
A pre-nup like almost all contracts need to be within reason to be enforce and more I am not going to as I am not a lawyer but she clearly need to see one.
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Green Witch
 
  1  
Reply Thu 12 Nov, 2009 06:26 pm
@KoratMommy,
You certainly do need to speak to an attorney and the sooner the better. Does he give you an allowance or do you have access to joint funds? Can you hide some money away? You need to start preparing, but be careful not to give off any signals. Does the prenup say anything about child support?
BillRM
 
  1  
Reply Thu 12 Nov, 2009 06:39 pm
@Green Witch,
Does the prenup say anything about child support?
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Once more I am saying things I should not say as a non-lawyer but no pre-nup can take away the power of the family courts to set either custody or child support conditions.

She need to see a lawyer as I had a feeling she will find herself in a far better situation then she or her husband think she is in now.
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