How to tell daughter her cat got run over

Oh hun - you're not a wuss. So sorry this happened to your kitty.

At my last house, our kitty was knocked over by a car - broke the kids hearts - we searched day and nite for her - Poppy - found her nearly a week later and had to bury her before the little fella came home, for the same reasons. All our kitties each had a grave ... and each had a carved name on a wooden plaque (PaPaIz carved them) and placed the kitties under a blossoming tree. The kids would often just go over and sit there in the paddock when they were feeling sad. Little fella still misses Poppy.

Let the kids know that your kitty wouldn't have felt any pain. Kids can't bear to think that their pet may have suffered at all. It was worse not knowing where Poppy was, when we found her, we all grieved for her then.

Have lost 3 cats to the road in years gone - and one who disappeared after we moved. Now have 2 kitties (one in the wars at the moment) - so completely understand how terrible you feel right now hun. Don't worry about crying with the kids either - that's part of the grief too... even for a cat/pet - they are part of your family.

Let us know how you go FreeDuck. Take care love. x

We keep our cats indoors. Just too busy around here to let 'em roam.

Cycloptichorn

Oh no! This is so sad.

There is no way to tell your kids without hurting them, so I'd just be direct: "Ducklet, I have bad news about Lucy. This morning, she got run over by a car and died. Dad and I buried her this afternoon. I'll show you where her grave is. Maybe you and I can make her a gravestone together." Something like that.

Hugs to you and your kids, especially Ducklet.

Well, they got home and I told them -- pretty much how Thomas described. They are both broken-hearted but, after visiting the grave site and a lot of crying, they decided to distract themselves from the pain by watching television.

Thanks everyone for all of the good advice. We'd lost two cats before but never found the bodies so never had this acute grief. Thanks for seeing us through.

Aww.... thanks for the update. Hugs to all of you.

Aww.
You did well, DuckMom.

(((((Ducks)))))

I'm sure that was the best way. I really like the avacado tree. I was going to suggest something of the sort.

So, just one more update. The kids decided to write notes to Lucy about how much they loved and missed her. Then we went to her grave site with candles, lit the candles, read the notes, then lit the notes on fire and burned them into the ether -- where Lucy could get them. The kids were so sweet. Then Duckie (who is taking this a little harder than his sister) grabbed one of the pavers and wrote her name on it with a sharpie and drew a couple of kitty pictures. After a while she had a tomb stone that said "Here Lies Lucy, the best lap kitty in the world". Not bad at all.

You did well, FreeDuck!
Thank goodness that you have another kitty, and it will receive lots of TLC
from both kids.

the other kitty will need lots of attention, it will be missing its companion also

Actually, that worries me. I'm from California (watches people yawn), and spent some years of my childhood near and under a rather large avocado tree - and it sounded as if this was all happening under another tree... (wondering how that will work...)

Ooh, free duck, good, very good.

That sounds really good.

Have you read "The Tenth Good Thing About Barney"?

You are raising some pretty great kids, msDuck.

(nods) They take after their parents.

Just catching up now, FreeDuck. I'm so sorry about Lucy/"Butt Warmer". Terrible when something like that happens to a beloved pet. You'll all miss her terribly. Now I'll have to read the rest of this thread. I hope your daughter is not too distraught.

I came to this late, but so sorry for your family's loss, freeduck. I know it would be a great blow to lose any of our felines. You handled that great - hadda be a hard thing...

The avocado has no chance to live in this climate anyway. It was a potted plant whose pot got broken and was waiting for us to get it another pot. It will survive until winter. After that, Lucy will rest under the bigger, shadier tree. It's all good.

No, but maybe I will.

We made pancakes this morning. Ducklet made some small ones for the pets, including Lucy. She took it out and laid it on the stone for her. Duckie says "she was too young to die, she had so much life left in her". Then vowed to kill whoever did it if he ever finds him. I'm hoping revenge is a natural feeling. Ducklet is ok most of the time but has bouts of random crying and she "really, really, really wants Lucy back". But over all everyone is doing ok.

Thanks so much to each of you for your kind words.