If I reapply at the same store that canned me, what are my chances?

actually, my counselor told me that what I did was "gross misconduct" lol. I asked her to explain and she was like, "any type of violence at all, even if not against a person." man, the law really tightened since my parents generation were teenaged employees.

That doesn't make you deserving of rehire.

In fact, your having "just another outburst of anger" just shows how little you do deserve it.

If a small comment like that makes you angry, how easy would it be to anger you IRL?

Or else, this is all a joke. I can't imagine someone saying they deserve to be rehired, yet continue to have outbursts, being serious.

Don't worry. Someone will eventually hire you. Just not an employer who carefully screens and interviews.

Do you know the definition of assault? It is any word or action that makes another person logically believe they are in danger of being struck, harmed, or whatever. So yes, violence that frightens customers or coworkers constitutes a form of assault. It doesn't have to progress to the point of battery where you actually punch somebody in order to be deemed gross misconduct.

And I have no doubt been around quite a bit longer than your parents and have been employed for all but a few months since I was 15. Sometime I need to add them all up, but I'm guessing that I've probably drawn a paycheck from 30 or more different kinds of jobs by now--several were held simultaneously. And in not a single one of them from way back then to present, would the behavior you described have been acceptable, tolerated, or not result in termination.

Again, you can't unring that bell. But the next time you can mentally tell yourself that being mad as hell and screaming at somebody are two separate things. You can't control being mad. But you can sure control whether you scream at somebody or not. You can't help being angry. But you can see that hitting a post is something different from being angry and choose not to do that.

All is not lost. The old cliche of that which does not kill us only makes us stronger has an element of truth in it. If you get a handle on this, I see you as being a great human resources manager or some other such professional somewhere on down the line. So get to it.

DD22, If you owned a business would you hire an employee with a temper like you have? Or would you look for someone who is more in control of themselves? I'm a business owner and I would never hire someone who I knew could activate my insurance or do damage to another person or property.

Green Witch, That's not always true; former employers are very careful about what they say to future employers of an ex-employee. There are ways around it, but not many without the proper training and background understand all the legal issues of what past employers say to all future prospective employers.

I agree with roger; fat chance is spot on!

I suppose if I owned a business or were an asst mgr of a huge corporation, I would can someone in a minute if s/he is a danger to customer/associate safety. Maybe I would be even meaner and nastier during the canning than the asst. mgrs. was when they canned me. And they were like, "You're not fit to work period. Maybe in a year or two you would be, but not now. Some people might never." That was pretty mean. And he actually threw my badge down on the desk when I handed it to him like it was a POS. Man he looked really angry.

My former employer specifically said they won't disclose to future employers exactly why I got fired, just that I am. And since this was a huge multinational corporation with formal rules and procedures, no one gets to be asst mgr w/o understanding all the legal issues.

That is true overall, CI, you can get sued if you trash someone. However, you can tell someone why a employee was dismissed if it is the truth and there is a record of it. I had a guy who stole something from a customer's property and I fired him. I gave him a written notice as to why he was being fired. He actually had the nerve to use me as a reference. I told potential employeers who called me the truth about why he was fired and that he was told in writing. It's why I mentioned to DD22 that his cause for dismissal would be put into a report and put on file. It's a way a business can protect itself. It may be different in other states, but that's how it is where I am.

PS - not sure if DD22 is male or female.

GW, You handled it correctly; not all former employers do so. Many don't have anything in writing or background "evidence" for their actions.

DD22 btw is female. lol this is prolly the 3rd time i ssaid i'm a girl.

I apologize DD22, I missed it. Chalk it up to sexual stereotyping.

I'm like actually so jealous of all the ppl who's been with that retail company for years on end, especially when it shows up on their badges. I'm jealous of my 16 y/o coworkers who have better contorl of themselves despite being a bit younger than me. Lastly, the ppl w/ Associate Recognition Awards...I don't even wanna think about them. And some ppl in mgmt started out as hourly associates. Some started as young as 16 and kept getting promoted, like the guy that canned me and the girl who watched me get canned. I'm not angry bc I got what I deserved, but how do I deal w/ being jealous?

Seconly, when **** happens, ppl talk. I mean, ppl could get fired for attendence problems and everyone in that particular shift knows. When word goes around about the incident, I don't think I could ever show my face in there again, even though they're not kicking me out. The friends I've made in there might be weird around me like I'm really mental or something. This sux!

dirrtydozen22- You screwed up big time. You were fired, for good cause. It sounds like you are addressing your anger management issues, which is good. The problem is, from what you have written here, I have the perception that you have a long way to go before your anger management issues are resolved.

IMO, you should not even thing of attempting to return to you old job, at least in the near future. You can do a couple of things. You can sit and stew about all the awful things that have happened to you. Or,...................you can use the experience and come out stronger and more mature from it. It is your life, and your choice.

In this economy, there are so many people who behave appropriately who are looking for work. Employers can pick and choose. You need to get yourself to the place in your life where you will be an asset to an organization, not a problem.

The assistant manager may have not been the most tactful, but IMO, he told you the unvarnished truth. I disagree with his statement, "Some people might never". People can always change, but it takes a lot of work. He was angry, and rightfully so, over what you did. Learn from the experience.

I hired and fired staff. One of the most difficult things is dealing with a staff member with an "attitude", especially one who acted out at work.

Put yourself in the assistant manager's shoes. How would YOU like to be struggling to run a business, and being bombarded by an employee's personal issues?

What kind of business did you run? Did you ever have employees w/ an "attitude" for which you canned him? Did anyone ever "act out" at your business to the degree as I have? sry, just curious. I just don't wanna feel like the only one who's guilty of something as severe as "cough* workplace violence or whatever *cough.* Moreover, I don't wanna feel like the only one who's going through crap right now, especially knowing that millions of ppl who could behave themselves at work are looking for a job at times like this.

For a moment in the discussion in my reply I'd like to by say you'll be doing the right thing with taking the Anger M 'gmt course, getting counseling and letting it sink in to help change your work personality. You're taking responsibility and that's commendable.

I'd like to reassure you that some people make mistakes on the job and sometimes they make repeated ones. For example, for more than a decade I used to write technical manuals. I supported myself and owned a house with the money I made from this. If it sounds hard and kind of boring, well...it was. But my point about this is about the responsibility ... you really didn't want miss deadlines and let management and other employees down. When you did that too often, you get fired. I got fired ...and more than once.

Being that I had to contribute my share of paying a mortgage, it was no small trouble. I learned the hard way the consequences of my actions. I learned how to modify my behavior so that it didn't bite me in the ass again. At first I blamed others, But then I looked in the mirror and realized it was up to me to be responsible for my own actions and make the changes..

DD, you wrote:



But earlier in the thread, you wrote:



Anyone who could put the words “…only exploded twice…” into a post has not truly gotten in touch with the problem at hand.

One explosion is way too many…twice is catastrophic. For you to even consider the thought “only twice” answers your question.

Get a job somewhere where you do not have to come into contact with customers…or fellow workers! Not sure what that would be…but there’s gotta be something out there somewhere.

As for the retailer…if they hire you back…they are the ones who need professional help, not you.

It seems like we're on the opposite end of the spectrum lol. You got fired for work performance but you at least behaved yourself. You also brought yourself back up in spite of everything, which is good. I got good work performance on the salesfloor but I couldn't even stop myself from physically assaulting an object in front of customer.
I was like, "Does it not matter that I work very hard in my dept?"
They were like, "That's not what we're terminating you for."
I also (recently) learned the hard way that my actions not only affect myself, but other ppl as well. However, since this is the first time in my life I'm owning up, it will be a long way b4 I have my issues completely resolved, but eventually it will happen.

DD: you're still not getting it. All bets are off when you exhibit that angry violent behavior that you did. A miss is as good as a mile and your other "good worker" record goes out the window. As an example, only doing 8 out of 10 task items is not enough to be allowed to stay. Say you had a part in a symphony and your part is a solo that requires you to play IN TUNE an entire page of sheet music all in synch with the rest of the orchestra. You play 2 out of 3 notes correctly. What will the piece sound like? What will the conductor and audience see and hear? It's not good music! You're out of tune..for right now. You'll learn your part better and try another type of music.

Read Frank's note again.