Gender Challenge: Am I a woman or a man?

Did I get the colours wrong? Im normally so good with clothes and colours. You must educate me.

The male touching is only a theory, described in academic circles as "contentious" which is euphemism for "you're kidding right?" Feel free to disagree. We will love you for it.
Theres a Freudian concept called anal eroticism, which is quite hard to measure.

Its always difficult: you have a right to be angry. The people wronged you. But your anger is hurting you more than its hurting them. Anyone that evil probably doesnt feel anything. Which is a punishment in itself, and a severe one. Sooner or later you have to let go of your anger because it is feasting on your soul.
I think you are being incredibly unkind to yourself. Your learnt much more than that there are evil people in this world. You never gave up. That it something that some people just don't learn,ever.
You came up with a plan to change things and you took the gamble. This is a constructive and positive way to behave: you were fighting impossible odds, and at a time when you were emotionally vulnerable.
On a personal note I find your candour very attractive: this is a beauty that cannot be bought and it is more precious than any jewel.
I believe that you engaging in the world will benefit all of us. I don't want to pressure you. The world has enough a---holes. Go out there and shake your cuchi.

Spendius: this is what I find weird about you. You have an amusing and engaging side. A poetic soul. A ready wit and charm. But then at the final hurdle its like you want to drive women away. This is my analogy.
The worlds greatest chef has invented a new chocolate cake. I am waiting for it in eager anticipation, with a hunger beyond endurance. Each detail is special. the right flowers. Someone has even managed to pick the right napkins. He marches confidently forward. My mouth moistens expecting to feel its exquisite perfection.
I am waiting,wanting, the chef reaches the table. I'm staring a bit too insanely, and give a faint embarrassed blush. I'm sure a small dribble is sliding from the corner of my lips. I am waiting for that satisfying moment of union. The chef is so close I can almost touch him. He is staring into my eyes.
He looks down at his proud creation. and whispers. F^^k you fatso, and gobs in it.
Surely hanging on to that side of yourself is literally making you a tosser.

Wow! Thank you so much Fountofwisdom for your very thoughtful words. You're right in everything you said and I do everything I can to leave the past where it belongs, in the past. Sometimes things surface for a while and I feel that anger coming back, but I know what to do when it happens. I get busy and throw myself into projects. Usually home improvement stuff.
You've got a way with words that I find very comforting and I could picture you being a writer. You're smart, you're funny and I like you

Yes, not at all one of your better sides, Spendi.

People are expressing guilt on posting on this thread for the same reasons they feel guilt at reading heat magazine, or watch celebrity big brother
It's entertainment at someone else's discomfort and gossip.

Spendius. Please explain your stance on feminism further.
The picture I always got, was you YOURSELF believe women have an equal stance to men, but you are pragmatic, and any views you may have in contrary to this are just considerations of society.

That being the case. I guess I am not an average male adult. I am, however, a male adult.

The thread seems to have gotten away from the original premise. It has, however, gone into what I suspect was FOW's real reason for the thread. I suspect that to be a thread where FOW could get the attention that he seeks so badly.

Yes, I suspect that FOW is a man and would venture a guess that his name probably starts with a K. I also think that he is a lost soul seeking an identity and is not really comfortable within himself. The hate that he expresses for his mother and father is something (again only my opinion) that troubles him and perhaps he blames himself for something from the past.

It is possible that he actually had some psychology courses but I do not believe the part about a degree. I wonder if anything that he actually wanted has been accomplished.

It is interesting that someone with a degree in psychology would go from goth to accounting trainee. Or, have I got the chronology wrong?

I think that FOW probably had a real sexual identity situation in younger years and has a problem relating to people in close relationships. Hence the rural living and spending so much time online.

Whatever or whoever FOW actually is no longer is the gist of this thread. Perhaps that is a good thing as it seems to have fulfilled some of what FOW is seeking.

FOW is in control by the evasive answers to some very pointed questions and the "game" has outlived it's usefulness.

I hope that FOW finds what he seeks. He does seem to be a very complicated soul with a sense of humour but a sensitivity to what he perceives as criticism.

I will continue to read along in what has become one of the more interesting sources of reading on A2K.

Wow Intrepid, in all that, the only thing I agree with is that he's a man. I can't see where you're getting the rest.

I've seen people go from goth to one legal secretary and one an executive in a large bank.

This is really buggin me Intrepid! This thread had finally died down to where everyone was being civil to Fount and along you come to stir the pot.

Why?

I think It's from the Institute for Sex Research. (There is such an organisation- part of University of Indiana, I believe). It does include threesomes, which if you do the Maths must include a homosexual component. There is also a less serious research establishment in California.
Basically any research on sex is difficult to prove because everybody lies. If you compare statistics on when people say they lost with their virginity, Blokes claim 13 women 17. In fact biologically Women mature earlier and have sex at a younger age than men. That is old research from the 70's, University of Minnesota, I think, Or whatever the top place in St Pauls is.

The original premise was criticised as stifling and stupid. I'm allowing it to move on: plus you got to admit listening to Montana is pretty stimulating whatever gear you've got in your underwear.
Here's something you may not have considered. Writers have to spend a lot of time in character, and explore various personalities. To a degree that may not be healthy. I have to imagine myself digging coal in confined underground chambers, then staring into mirrors and wondering which would be that perfect seductive shade of scarlet which would capture my man, I have worn metaphorical stillettos and clattered clumsily in steel capped boots.
I am a writer, insomuch as I have written books. They have been rejected as being a little unsettling and weird for an average audience, which is unbelievable I know.
I'm not sure if I actually still have a soul as so many Characters have inhabited my body. I haven't checked lately.

[quote
But then at the final hurdle its like you want to drive women away. This is my analogy.[/quote]

Not at all. Goad them into effort really. When men show too much eagerness and pant at their feet like doting little hungry puppies women treat them with the contempt they deserve. I also think that such men are insulting by implying with their supplications that women are not dangerous. For men such as myself, who have a great deal to offer women, knowing as I do what they really want, it is high etiquette to let them make the moves. All the oily grovellers want is a shag: a conquest. And a Mom substitute to wash dishes. I have made women climb ladders in their finery and drive 30 miles. I was a catch you see. I learned the trick off good looking women. And what effort the ladies I approved brought to their work. What use is a woman who thinks she is doing me a favour. Sex is wildly over-rated. Women need it much more than men because to them it is far more than a physical reflex over and done with in a short time. "Juddering on Julie" I think Juvenal called it. You don't hold all the aces in my book and I would advise avoiding men who think you do. They are only pretending anyway. It's patronising really. The idea that a few drinks and a load of fancy slop in a tricked up restaurant and some sweet talk learned off actors is going to persuade you to grant such a use of your body is profoundly insulting in my view.

Therein lies the danger to women of reading the literary productions of the type of women who expect to be pampered. The selection process for women writers in magazines and newspapers is garuanteed to choose that type, doting Daddy's little treasures from day one, and they are a pain in the neck. And a small percentage of the female species.

You need to stop taking any notice of them and get real.




Anybody in that state should be on their knees begging and offering favours in return. Did you never watch Benny Hill? The Daddy's little treasures got him banned off telly.
[/quote]I am waiting,wanting, the chef reaches the table. I'm staring a bit too insanely, and give a faint embarrassed blush. I'm sure a small dribble is sliding from the corner of my lips. I am waiting for that satisfying moment of union. The chef is so close I can almost touch him. He is staring into my eyes.
He looks down at his proud creation. and whispers, "**** you fatso", and gobs it in himself. [/quote]

You can't blame him if that's your contribution to the dynamics. He did give you the chance to get beyond the syrup dummy.



And you end up blurting assertions to save your face. How do you know that one of the kitchen maids, or two maybe, hadn't just given him a blow job before he entered. That's a reasonable surmise if he is the world's greatest chef.

You can bet your panties that any bloke who disagrees with that is either ugly, skint, stupid or sex starved. Possibly all the lot. Someone you can tease like little girls do with puppies by waving a dog biscuit around their nose.

I'll stay a tosser thanks very much. It's only a word.

It is that feminism is running women off a cliff so that a very tiny minority of women can have well paid jobs writing thrumming and exciting drivel in the sheets.

Oooops! It already has done. They just haven't hit the ground yet.

I wish you ladies would take all the jobs over. The bloody lot. Not just the easy, clean ones.

The consequences to society have become more visible in the last few months. (see my post about the melon on the Brit thread.) I don't blame bankers or regulators. They were merely supplying a demand. No demand for living beyond your means and they couldn't have done what they did. They are "tossers" too. That's just scapegoating really.

Valmont was a tosser as well.

PS- My username is "spendius". I chose not to use "S" because I am a pale shadow of Spendius. And he ended up crucified. Have you never read Salammbo Queenie? You should. Gustave sweated blood writing that wonderful book. And he had George Sand beating at his door all the while. To no avail.

Princess Mathilde loved that book. She sought his company. There is not a wasted word in it.

I think "may" would be better than "must" Fountie.

I was a virgin soldier.

Forget that **** Fountie. Any writing coming from there is inauthentic. Absolutely. And easily spotted. You should only write from experience unless you do masses of difficult research. And even then you can only use your own experience of the human condition to energise your characters.

Your gratuitous use of "tosser" tells me you have a lot of lessons to learn. I'm me. Callng me a tosser takes you nowhere outside your own head.



Those people say all sorts of things to let you down softly. Like blaming the "average audience" when inauthenticity was the probable reason. You need to be tough on yourself to write.

What on earth is the "average audience"?

Dearest Montana.
I had a friend who wanted to be a vet. He ended up as a butcher, he always joked about at least he was working with animals. I know a research Mathematician, who worked as an "erotic dancer" to finance her studies. She can still shake her stuff, even approaching 40. She gets invited to parties.
Thank you for fighting my defence, I can look after myself, but consider it a priviledge to have you by my side, it feels very comfortable and natural, like a missing part of me has been returned.
Here is my explanation of what has been happening: I started this thread in a cynical attempt to meet that special person. At which point fate's firm hands guided us ever closer. We are divided physically by a vast dark ocean, but spiritually we are closer than any two people that have ever lived.
I also have been obsessing more than is healthy about releasing your panties from their safe moorings, and brushing them lightly down your legs.
And further erotic adventures. I invite you to join with me. I have been accused of being evasive and abstract, here is one thing I want to state publicly and clearly. You are one hell of a sexy lady. One of the reasons I never needed pornography is that I have a fair store of memories. Most of my relationships ended because I am an a---hole, not because I didnt enjoy the sex bit.
Here's an explanation for me that none of you have considered: I used to race motorcycles: thats how macho I was. I didnt have to worry about being called a fudge packer. I always had a gorgeous babe in tow. Mostly quantity rather than quality, soap stars and chicks with their first hit records.
My racing colours were pink. Dianese. Italian. Number 13. I race f^^king motorbikes you faggots out there, thats how big my tadger is.
Of course I tempted fate once to often. I raced wearing number 13. a wet track in Germany took away my legs. My dangly bits are still there, but damaged, doctors say I need a miracle. Hey we all need miracles.
I have a much higher voice: thats why I have "issues" with sexuality, you thoughtless a^^^holes. It could also explain why I'm angry.
I know buying shoes is a chick thing, Hey the mind is stupid, I buy shoes in the hope my legs will grow back. How F^^^^king dumb is that?
Of course, this could be a fantasy. I could also be a cynical villain from belarus. I don't pick young girls, they haven't got any money. I know what a lady wants because i am one. I am here to remove their cash, as well as their pants, leave them naked: spiritually and financially. I know what women want. I am one.
By the way Montie, I can say this is true, I am a crap writer, it's only meeting you that has given me this voice. And i would consider it an honour to share whatever I can with you.
All the world is a stage. And each of us must play a part.

Spendius, my sweet, It looks like I goaded you into making an effort. I think the same goes for men too. I'm not bothered about the games and stuff. If you want quality you have to pay: with blood.
I don't believe in pandering a blokes ego: if it needs pandering that much then the other stuff probably doesn't work.
Personally I respond to confidence: it shows you have some outstanding qualities. I don't argue with any of what you said: I know some women who'd really love that.
However, I wouldn't recommend saying it out loud. Women prefer to be loved than understood.
I differ from you. I love the sex bit. When its done right.