A computer once beat me at chess, but it was no match for me at kick boxing.
An engineer is walking down the road one day, and, seeing a frong on the side of the road, bends down to look at it. Suddenly, it pipes up and talks to him!
"I may look like a frog now, but I'm really a princess - if you kiss me, I'll turn back into my real self!"
The engineer smiles, picks up the frog, puts it in his (pocket protected) shirt pocket and goes on to the lab.
When he gets to the lab, he puts the frog down to get some work done, and she opens her mouth to speak:
"I tell you, I'm a beautiful princess! If you kiss me, I'll turn back, and I'll do anything you want!"
The engineer smiles, and goes on with is work. After he's done, he picks the frog up. She again starts talking to him:
"Look, I'm a princess turned into a frog! If you kiss me, I'll turn back into a beautiful woman. I'll do whatever you want! And I'll stay with you forever!"
The engineer peers at the frog, smiles, and tucks it back in his pocket for the walk home. When he gets there, he pulls her out, and she nearly screams at him:
"WHAT THE HELLS THE MATTER WITH YOU? Here I am, I'm a beautiful princess, I'll do whatever you want, and I'll stay with you forever! Why won't you kiss me??"
The engineer says, "Well, I don't have time for a girlfriend,..."
@tsarstepan,
I think this one is my favorite:
@timur,
During the French revolution's Time of Terror, three men had been condemned to be executed by guillotine on the same day -- a priest, a doctor and an engineer. All three climbed up on the scaffold and it was decided the priest would go first. But the cleric had an unusual request: he asked to be executed with the nape of his neck resting on the neck-rest rather than being face down. He said he wanted his last view of this life to be of the sky rather than a dirty wooden floor. The request was granted and the priest was allowed to lie on his back, looking up at the guillotine blade that was about to descend.
And an apparent miracle happened! The deadly blade came swooping down and suddenly stopped just inches from the priest's throat. The officials conferred among themselves and decided that it was a sign from God and that the cleric should be pardoned and released. He was allowed to go.
Now it was the doctor's turn. On a whim, he made the same request as the priest had and asked to be executed while lying on his back. And the same thing happened -- the blade descended and stopped short of its target. The doctor, too, was allowed to escape his alloted punishment.
No fool, the engineer now requested the same privilege and treatment. They laid him down on his back, his throat exposed to the blade of the guillotine, and he looked up at the mechanism designed to end his miserable existence. Looking up at the complicated arrangement of ropes and pulleys, he suddenly exclaimed: "Say! I think I see what the problem is here!"
@vonny,
But I really like Windows 7.
Best OS out there right now. ((sulks))
@tsarstepan,
So did I, until I got Windows 8!
@vonny,
I wonder what they'll do when they get to windows 95?
