So what did your parents hit you with?

Green Witch wrote:

Neither myself or my brothers were ever physically disciplined. I think it has made us better, kinder people who look to verbally negotiate instead of reacting violently when people don't behave as we would like them to. One of my brothers has a terrible temper, and without physical violence, my parents taught him how to control it and channel it in a healthier manner. I would never hit a child. I think if you can't outsmart and out reason a child you should not be a parent. I cringe when I see parents smacking their children, I wouldn't even hit one of my dogs. Why would anyone think violence (spanking included) is a good way to teach anything?

My parents spanked both my brother and I. My brother had a bad temper and he too learned to control it well. We both love and respect our parents and are still very close to them. Just because you don't believe it to be right does not mean it doesn't work for others. Nor does it mean my parents were bad parents. They were and are wonderful. They sacrificed much so we can be where we are today. There was never a moment where I did not think my parents loved me more than themselves.

Smacking a child is not spanking...I would never publicly humiliate my children...verbally or physically. My parents never embarrassed me...they did not talk about me to their friends (which is another way of humiliating your child) they respected me and I them. No...we definitely see different on this one Green Witch

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gustavratzenhofer wrote:

CalamityJane wrote:
I used to scream so loud - even before the spanking - to make
certain, the neighbors could hear it. .

Some things never change.

At least I am consistent Very Happy

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Well, lots of people, including reasonable people.

A long term associate/friend was raised herself with swattings and swatted her boy. He didn't have a father figure for a bit, but when he did, he was moderately standoffish, and she was mom and dad.

The boy had problems in his teens, as many of my friends' boys have had, spanking/swatting/hitting or not, much of his problems having seemingly to do with the absent father - so I can't just zero that in on swats here and there. Mother and son are still well conversant and loving - well, love getting more points than anger - with him in his forties. Let's say there are dominance issues ongoing.

I pretty much agree with K, Dag and GreenWitch, but have some inches for considering that all reasonable people don't agree with us.

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Wooden cooking spoons, shoes, a shovel and umm... a refridgerator... Embarrassed

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Agree, Mismi, that parents can smack children without physical action, as in conversational dumps to others.

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Well, main thing is that we have learned from our parents not to hit
our children. My daughter was never spanked and never will be, as I find
other means of punishment much more effective.

On the other hand, parents in those days didn't know any different and
they still loved us and we loved them.

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My mother was partial to using a comb on me, mostly while she tussled with me and my kinky hair, and a slipper, the kind with the hard sole, on my brothers.

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mismi wrote:

We both love and respect our parents and are still very close to them. Just because you don't believe it to be right does not mean it doesn't work for others. Nor does it mean my parents were bad parents. They were and are wonderful. They sacrificed much so we can be where we are today. There was never a moment where I did not think my parents loved me more than themselves.

Smacking a child is not spanking...I would never publicly humiliate my children...verbally or physically. My parents never embarrassed me...they did not talk about me to their friends (which is another way of humiliating your child) they respected me and I them. No...we definitely see different on this one Green Witch

We will probably have to agree to disagree on this one Mismi. I think spanking is violence. I think you and your brother would have come out just as well if your parents left out the spanking part and just used non-physical punishment. I think you are the person you are today because your parents loved you and cared about you. You are willing to interpret spanking as an expression of that love. I just can't see it that way. I think it's why spanking is a fetish for some people, they associate it with being loved.

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I recall the time my dad fashioned a crude weapon out of a two by four with nails pounded through one end in a haphazard fashion, the nails protruding outward at every conceivable angle, resulting in something that would have fit right in during the medieval wars.

The whooshing sound that thing made as my dad swung it at me, his eyes blazing with fury, still rings in my ears all these years later.

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Interesting point, have to think about that, you're probably right, GW.

A slipper... now that stopped me as an image. Not severe by choice, but a whacker.

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belts, hands.. but the scariest of all was the wooden spoon.

that fker stung

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I don't mean to be unsympathetic in entirety to either sudden anger at a child, which I've experienced one time for a few seconds, or a culture of controlled spanking, understanding that those two are different (to reiterate, I am for not spanking).

I remember a small engagement of wills with my niece of let's say two and a half, where I went from what? to breathing in to some not ugly response in a few seconds. It didn't occur to me to hit her, but I remember a flash of anger. I'd not been around babies and toddlers all that much, sort of a visitor to all that, and this was a new deal.

That was about when she had been abandoned twice by her mother for four to six months at a time.. I'm sure it was just before that all started happening. And then her life and mine intertwined more.

You'll all, I hope, frown that mom got custody, oh, never mind.

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My grandfather's razor strop. We called it "The Strap."

Mom & Dad had built it up as the ultimate punishment. Usually, all Dad would have to say was, "Go get The Strap," and the three of us would immediately fall into line. Occasionally, though, we pushed our luck too far, and earned a spanking with it.

Dad's spankings were hard enough to leave some red marks, but they didn't last long. Those spankings brought real tears. But Mom's spankings...well. We pretended our giggles were crying and faked tears so she wouldn't figure out that it didn't hurt a bit.

After Mom & Dad died, I took "The Strap." It's mine now...I'm keeping it. Cool

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Wet wooden spoon, wet hair brush - on bare bottoms. If the crime wasn't so bad or parents weren't so frustrated, it would be a wet hand on a bare bottom.

We also had to stand in the corner, touching your toes for "hours" on end.

And then, of course, was the bar of soap in the mouth if you lipped off.

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Why wet, Mame? Did that hurt more?

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I gotta say, about twenty years later, that a chunky part of what I love about my niece is her ebullient spirit, plus her heart --- and that they were there back when she was a rolly polly baby gurl.

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My father hit me once. I ran out into the street chasing a ball. He swatted me on the rear. Never forgot it. Never ran into traffic again.

My mother hit me frequently. Since it was always in anger, by the definitions established here, these were not spankings. She plain out hit me. When I was a child, she used a leather belt, a shoe, a ping-pong paddle, and a hair brush. When I got older she'd lash out with a smack across my face. Hard. Always in anger. I clearly remember the last time she did it. She smacked me hard. My glasses flew off my face and across the room. I told her that if she hit me again, I'd hit her back. I meant it. She never hit me again.

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Ok, Robbie, you got me to cry. And I know you didn't post that with that in mind re any of us.

Love you.

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ossobuco wrote:

Ok, Robbie, you got me to cry. And I know you didn't post that with that in mind re any of us.

Love you.

Love you, too, kid. I started crying when I first saw this thread. Left. Came back. Posted. What the hell.

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Back at you..

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So what did your parents hit you with?

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