Living with idiots....

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Since I have moved back home...my brother and his girlfriend have been here every single day. I had no choice but to be here every single day because I am taking care of my mom. They LITERALLY live in his room. I know I have mentioned before that they sit in there all day and do nothing but smoke pot and watch movies and play video games. About 6 weeks ago, my brother buys a pit bull puppy and brings it home. Now we have 3 dogs, 2 cats, and a sick mother to take care of. On top of taking care of my mom, the rest of us now have puppy duty and puppy training. He leaves the puppy in his cell sized room all day or sometimes leaves him out with the other dogs. But when he brings him to his room, all three of them live in there. This dog is just a puppy now....but it's father was 130lb and he is expected to get bigger.

Another thing.... I never had nor ever wanted a sister. But since my brothers girlfriend is living here practically now, she's become one. She borrows my clothes (she does wash them and bring them back), she borrows hair and face stuff, and she takes other things without asking. I can tell every place she has been in my room because when I enter it, every drawer she touched is open with clothes exploding out of them. I caught her trying to microwave my favorite, and only, ALUMINUM coffee mug! I told her that she can't microwave metal in microwaves and she asked me... why? Ugh! They throw bong water and plastic snack wrappers in the toilet but never flush it so that the next person that goes in there will have to take out the plastic and flush the toilet.

She's 18 and we get along great, we have never gotten into a fight or anything, but she is the biggest airhead I know. I really don't mind the fact that she takes my things. I do mind that they live like pigs and trash the house, but I don't make a big deal of it. What worries me more is that one day I'm going to wake up in a blazing fire as the house burns down before me because she passed out with another lit cigarette in her hand.

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X25 and thats my old house

6 dogs 13 cats wait ok they just got a chihuahua so thats 7(plus puppies and kittens) whcih are gone now

they got rid of all but 4 cats.

the tweakers are out.

yeah its not as bad now.

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Isn't smoking pot and even possessing pot illegal - you could always report them to the police that would get them out of the house. And while they are gone, bring the uncared for pup to the animal shelter.

If you don't want to go that extreme at the very least, I suggest you buy a lock for your room. That way "sis" cannot get at your things. Next time they leave plastic or any other inappropriate items in the toilet, put on some rubber gloves remove the offensive items and deposit them (soaking toilet water wet) on their bed.

Honestly though if you don't speak up and make a stink about, they will not change. And how do you expect them too? They are happy with how things are - if you don't have a talk about it, how would they know anything is a problem?

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Are you just venting, kitkat, or looking for help?

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Mame wrote:

Are you just venting, kitkat, or looking for help?

I am looking for an absolution to my problem, however, it has been proven that venting is used as a form of involuntary solution that many of us indulge in to help us ease our tension. In this case, I am wondering if it is worth my time and energy to correct the problem when my time here is limited.

Another thing.... if my suspicions regarding the possibilities of my brother's girlfriend being pregnant are true, I'm going to shoot myself...or move really...really...really far away....forever.

You would think that we were nothing but white trash with all the things I come on here to talk about. But it's actually quite the opposite. We actually live in one of the most expensive cities in Orange County, CA. We all drive fancy-smancy cars and wear brand label clothing (well...not me at least, I drive a Ford...). But I mean, this really does seem like something out of a really bad reality tv program. You have drugs, sex, and alcohol, a sick mother in the hospital with a brain tumor, a father drinking himself to death, a live-in girl friend who could possibly be pregnant with the son's child, and a 24 year old female divorcee living back at her parents house to take care of her mother.

Not to mention my brother's new puppy again or anything....

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Well, kat, I am not fully sure why you are living there. Yes, I do understand about your mother, but I'm not sure you couldn't do the same helping for her if you were in your own studio apartment, for example. You seem to volunteer to be mired. I understand feeling trapped by circumstances and so will not yell at you quite as much as I usually do, but I hope you take a loooong walk on the closest long beach, country road, etc., and consider your options from a wider view than you presently have.

Speaking for myself, I felt angry and rebellious and trapped many times in my younger years, for good reason, and the hell of it is, when I grew older, I realized I was right with my gripes many of those times. I just failed to look more widely at different things I could do. I thought I was being so radical and I was just, er, squeaking to myself.

It's hard for any of us to separate our investment in our current situation and views on it... and try to stand aside and look.

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kitkat, I am going to be blunt and I hope you don't mind. I'm old enough to be your mother, so I'm going to give you some motherly advice.

You are a drama queen, hon. You are living a soap opera; wherever you are, you are in the middle of problems. Major problems. Problems that aren't yours and that you can't solve. Your family sounds quite dysfunctional (welcome to most of the world's population) and you do too, frankly. If you really and truly want to change all this, you need to have a good long look at what it is that you are attracting and what it is you want. It's a long road, but if you take it a step at a time, you will get there and along the way you'll have fun discovering all sorts of things (ie. this road isn't a prison sentence).

If you disassociate yourself from your family and their problems (with distance, both physical and emotional), that would be a great start. Take yourself out of that movie that's playing and try and watch them as an observer. Try to get some perspective on what is happening and why. These are the first and crucial things you need to do in order to obtain some objectivity. Once you have that, you can plan your life around what YOU want to do, not what is expected of you.

I hope you're still with me and are okay with all that, because there's more.

Remember, you are responsible and accountable to YOURSELF first. That's very important. People lay guilt trips on others (especially family) and that's not going to help you. No matter what your family's issues are, they are not YOURS. If you were dead, they'd still be there with all their problems. Helping can sometimes be enabling, which is not a good thing. You can't solve all the problems and no one really expects you to. The best thing you can do for yourself is to look after No. 1, which is YOU. Start with that.

Best of luck to you, hon.

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mame you could have aimed that post at me! im a drama , king?

:/

im learning to forgive people for the stupidity now, so much i just ignore it Very Happy

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you finally noticied that mame?

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Chai, I get 'em all mixed up. I read a similar post (Oh, I think you know who I'm talking about!) and I thought it was the same person for a while there Very Happy

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Oh yeah, the one who has to have sex every 2 days, and hates her boyfriends mother?

I wonder how her genital piercing is doing?

good god

She should be up there at camp with you, as one of those, uh whadayacallem.....comfort girls.

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LOL... "comfort girls"??? HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA You're such a citified little thing!

What the hayll you do think this is, anyway? lol Or should I say, "When?" This is not 1852, you know, during the Klondike Gold Rush. (Set, do NOT come in here and correct any of my historical mistakes). There is no Whiskey Jack Bar, there are no train robbers, nobody's hitchin' their horses to the hitching post, nobody's totin' a gun, and there are no "madams" Smile

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Chai has a mix up, Chai has a mix up...

not the same.

Not that I don't empathize with confusion.

Kitkat is quite bright if oft-befuddled. She has made some changes in her time at a2k. She knows about drama being a drama major/graduate and apparently not a stupid one. She has writing potential, at least to me.
Is sometimes a drama queen but often with reason.
I rail at her regularly but am pulling for her.

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I know I'm all mixed up. What else is new?

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oh, so you'd prefer if I called them "camp followers"?

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Okay, okay, can we agree on "groupies"?

sheesh!

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nice ladies

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There ain't nobody here but me, anyway, of the female persuasion, and I can tell you, I ain't no madam. Or Lady of the Night. Or Cheap Trick.

These fellers are fine and dandy for a hand of cribbage but that's about it.

Living with idiots....

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