Quality of Expession and Clarity of thought

PLAYFUL ALCHEMY

Teaching and learning have so many parts without certain answers. As my experience as an educator grows, I do not want to desert my ideas, enthusiasm or questions for the answer. To be a teacher I must be a learner.
Education is difficult, evasive and subjective. Can anything worth knowing really be taught? How do we create profound learning experiences? How do we judge what has been learned? These questions are eternal and make me reluctant to take on the clichéd title of "teacher". In a well-known parable, a boy is asked to write an essay on courage. He only writes two words: "This is." If he was aware of the risk of not writing a true essay, then it was a courageous act. I have pondered whether the boy's initiative to tackle this assignment uniquely should be rewarded. Questions are learning's engine, and so the answers and grades should not be the main motivation. Learning is much of the time obscure and illusory. Therefore, so is my title and answer to the question presented in the parable. Before you lose all hope in me being an educator, you must realize that I am chasing it, but just can't seem to grasp it. At the moment I am comfortable chasing what it means to be a teacher.

In my chase I have realized that learning is so much bigger than that for which I can plan. What I conceive as a learning outcome at the beginning of a class, can change if I allow it. During a unit on global warming I gave the students a choice on their final project. One group loved concept maps and predictably made one. The map was unremarkable in content, but its size was prominent. As it was about to be presented, it was found ripped in half in what they later called "an assassination attempt". Students in the group had tears welling in their eyes. Upset by the students' loss of hope I gave a short speech about how the measure of a man and a team comes through in adversity. Before I had even finished, they were throwing sticky tape across our classroom, giving orders, and planning the restoration of their map. I did little, but get in the way as they needed more room. Presenting to year 8 classes who were not very interested, the group all proudly held a piece of this big map. Afterwards as Billy and I walked back from the theatre, Billy earnestly commented that, "it was the best thing anyone in his class had ever done". What Billy lived I cannot grade. Assessing what he learnt depends on what I value, and not necessarily on what influence the learning experience may have had. My decision to give the groups a choice may have enabled Billy's group to be imaginative, and for their ownership of the project to grow. .Control was then given to them. In charge was their curiosity. I become smaller a guest in their classroom, while they became bigger than anything I could plan for.

The quest to have more real learning experiences enables me to keep walking into the classroom each day. A perfect learning environment is nearly impossible, and this has created a relaxed attitude. It can be done I believe, if I am good enough and this gives me a drive to improve. When conversing with friends I often ask who their favorite teachers were. Ones that saw something in me, were kind, let me express myself, understood kids, challenged me, or had a fun classroom are the answers I receive. Teachers like this motivate me to become better than I am today.

I want to improve (style)because I respect and like students. Maybe it's because of their innocence, sense of play, or their ideological view of justice, and forgiveness. These are attributes that I regard highly. A colleague of mine who is 6-4 as mean as a snake, and does not have any of these attributes, decided to conduct a bag search. From when he entered the room the class sat frozen from fear except one boy. Mustapha was adamant that it was unjust for his bag to be searched. My colleague was bewildered and I was in awe, because of the passion of his stand. Parent teacher night enabled me to express my admiration for, Mustapha's stand and his father's support of it. Mustapha and his father walked away profoundly hopeful in their values. This to me is more honest and important than any grade, I could have given. I learnt more from Mustapha, than anything my dictator of a colleague had ever taught me. Amongst the many thing's I learnt, he also helped me remember the 12 year old in me. For when the 12 year old in me dies, so will my teaching career.

What Billy lived I cannot grade

Quote:

PLAYFUL ALCHEMY

Teaching and learning have ("so" is a comparative word, but nothing is being compared here.)many parts without sure (Change certain to sure. "Certain" can be interpreted as specific.) answers. As my experience as an educator grows, I do not want to desert my ideas, enthusiasm or questions for the answer. To be a teacher, I must be a learner.
Education is difficult, evasive and subjective. Can anything worth knowing really be taught? How do we create profound learning experiences? How do we judge what has been learned? These questions are eternal and make me reluctant to take on the clichéd title of "teacher". In a well-known parable, a boy is asked to write an essay on courage. He only writes two words: "This is." If he was aware of the risk of not writing a true essay, then his was a courageous act. I have pondered whether the boy's initiative to tackle this assignment uniquely should be rewarded. Questions are learning's engine, and so the answers and grades should not be the main motivation. Learning is much of the time obscure and illusory. Therefore, so are my title and answer to the question presented in the parable. Before you lose all hope in my being an educator, you must realize that I am chasing it(What does "it" refer to?), but just can't seem to grasp it. At the moment I am comfortable chasing what it means to be a teacher.

In my chase I have realized that learning is (delete so) much bigger than that for which I can plan. What I conceive as a learning outcome at the beginning of a class (delete comma) can change if I allow it to. During a unit on global warming I gave the students a choice on their final project. One group loved concept maps and predictably made one. The map was unremarkable in content, but its size was prominent(change prominent to remarkable). As it was about to be presented, it was found ripped in half in what students later called "an assassination attempt". Students in the group had tears welling up in their eyes. Upset by the students' loss of hope, I gave a short speech about how the measure of a man and a team comes through in adversity. Before I had even finished, they were throwing sticky tape across our classroom, giving orders, and planning the restoration of their map. I did little (delete comma)but get in the way as they needed more room. Presenting to year 8 classes who were not very interested, the group all proudly held a piece of this big map. Afterwards as Billy and I walked back from the theatre, Billy earnestly commented that, "it was the best thing anyone in his class had ever done". What Billy lived I cannot grade.(This seems ok to me. You might want to change it to What Billy lived cannot be graded.)Assessing what he learnt depends on what I value (delete comma) and not necessarily on what influence the learning experience may have had. My decision to give the groups a choice may have enabled Billy's group to be imaginative thus giving their ownership of the project to grow. Control was then given to them. It was their curiosity that was in charge. I became smaller, a guest in their classroom, while they became bigger than anything I could have anticipated.

My quest to give my students more real learning experiences enables me to keep walking into the classroom each day. A perfect learning environment is nearly impossible, and this has created a relaxed attitude. It can be done I believe, if I am good enough, and this gives me the drive to improve. When conversing with friends, I often ask who their favorite teachers were. Ones that saw something in me, were kind, let me express myself, understood kids, challenged me, or had a fun classroom are the answers I receive. Teachers like this motivate me to become better than I am today.

I want to improve (style)because I respect and like students. Maybe it's because of their innocence, their sense of play, or their ideological view of justice, and forgiveness. These are attributes that I regard highly. A colleague of mine who is 6-4(Does this refer to his height? If so, say 6 feet four inches or 6'4"), as mean as a snake, and does not have any of these attributes (delete comma) decided to conduct a bag search. From when he entered the room, the class sat frozen from fear except one boy. Mustapha was adamant that it was unjust for his bag to be searched. My colleague was bewildered, and I was in awe, because of the passion of his stand. Parent-teacher night enabled me to express my admiration for (delete comma) Mustapha's stand and his father's support of it. (You need to explain the father's support. You refer to it as if the readers will know what you mean.)Mustapha and his father walked away profoundly hopeful in their values. (What does this mean? This is vague.) This to me is more honest and important than any grade (Delete comma) I could have given. I learnt more from Mustapha (delete comma) than anything my dictator of a colleague had ever taught me. Amongst the many thing's I learnt, he also helped me remember the 12-year-old in me. For when the 12-year-old in me dies, so will my teaching career.

Much of what you've written is connected. This needs to be clearer and sharper.

Roberta do you mean that the writing is connected and i have to make this more obvious with a theme?

Sullyfish in your second post the paragraphs are much shorter then Fresco's and your original post.Is this how you think the piece should be written?

Quote:

Much of what you've written is connected. This needs to be clearer and sharper.

Roberta do you mean that the writing is connected and i have to make this more obvious with a theme?

The ideas (not all) are connected. A theme would enable you to link them together. At first I thought that your opening statement was the theme--to be a teacher you must first be a learner. But you wandered from that. I then thought that the theme was, How can anything worth knowing be taught? There were other potential themes that emerged, but none was dominant. You need to decide what this is about. Then you must pick and choose the statements and examples that expand on and illucidate your theme. What does your mean colleague have to do with anything? Only what Mustapha did. Things you can't teach? This is a matter of character, not classroom knowledge, I think.

Someone once provided a very easy approach to speech-making: Tell them what you're going to say (state your theme), say it (expand and give examples), and then tell them what you said (summarize to show that you've made your point). Simplistic but accurate.