Thanks, mostly I posted this out of frustration and to just get it out.
Funny thing is, these girls are over right now.
That's true Marty. Mean people suck, but they're everywhere and it's better to learn how to deal with them when you're younger.
You've been a great support to your daughter and that's very important. That alone is worth more than you may know :-)
I was an only child, and in some early life, lived on the sixth floor of an apartment building, not all so small re number of units, in Riverdale, the Bronx. Looking back many decades later, that might have been our penultimate of middle classness. In any case, there were only a few, well, three, children in the building. And then we moved to Chicago, or Evanston, which had a streetful of children.
Something on like day 2, or 3, some girl accosted me in a front yard and rubbed my face with snow and ice. Sure, I remember her name, even now.
To say I had no clue, re the aggression or any testing behind it, well, it's obvious, I was splotzed. I did get a grip over time.
I'm glad I wasn't all alone, had other kids to talk with.
I think that was a fortuitous time for me, the clue that others could agree with me.
To some extent, my experience back then resonates. Talking with others can be good.
I was pretty happy that she chose to spend an afternoon with another girl. I keep telling her that college will get easier.......is that true?
Probly for her, but not for you, Marty.....
Love em while ya got em....
Anyone ever read Margaret Atwood's novel, Cat's Eye?
Cordelia, childhood bully with huge influence within her small circle of (girl) friends was one of the cruellest fiction characters I've come across. With lasting effects on her chosen victim! Brrrrrr
martybarker wrote:I was pretty happy that she chose to spend an afternoon with another girl. I keep telling her that college will get easier.......is that true?
I suppose it all depends Marty. I know adults who are mean, so I think we'll always run into situations like this through out our lives and we just learn to deal with it better as we get older.
I'm remember the comment that idiot (co worker at hospital) made to you last year (I think it was) and how all of us who responded agreed that the fool only managed to make an ass out of himself.
I always try to remember that the mean people are the miserable ones and I pitty them.
Wow Montana, you remember that?
ossobuco wrote:I haven't read Atwood...
When she's good she's wonderful!
Olga, is Cat's Eye the one about three women and their relationships over the years? And one of them is kind of a manipulator and messes with the other girls' lives... No, I think that's a different one, I just can't think of the name of it. I'm going to have to see if I've read Cat's Eye. (Margaret Atwood is one of my faves-- just got Mr C to read Oryx and Crake...)
Okay, sorry for the off-topic-ness!
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Marty, I was thinking-- there might be an upside to the spoiled evening...which would be your daughter *not* having a chance to get involved with a boy in a band!
Yes, I thought "Cat's Eye" was a documentary made about a girl from my childhood/teenage years.
Horrible, and VERY accurate.
(I still wish I had the ability to go back in time and teach her a lesson -- I don't think contacting her now would do anything in particular, as I suspect that her brand of horribleness had as much to do with her age as my inexplicable acceptance of her horribleness did. Now I would turn around and walk away at the first sign of it. Which is the point, I guess. Part of the education we go through about humanity and how to approach it.)
martybarker wrote:I was pretty happy that she chose to spend an afternoon with another girl. I keep telling her that college will get easier.......is that true?
I'm hoping the same thing, Marty, but I'm hearing that in these days of Facebook and Myspace that the cattiness begins online before they ever arrive on campus.
online just makes communicating easier and gives you more methods to communicate your message such as pictures videos etc.... so I can see how it assists with kids picking on eachother
Slightly off-topic - the only book of hers I liked was The Blind Assassin. She's too, I don't know how to describe it, hmmm... abstract-y for me. I hated Cat's Eye - and didn't like the Edible Woman. Haven't tried others. Only read The Blind Assassin because it was a gift. Loved it.
Okay, back to the topic
- mean girls... my daughter had a 'friend' in high school - they were on again, off again. Her name was Andrea. One time when they were 'off' (and age 12), we got a phone call from a strip joint asking Denise to show up for her scheduled interview - ha ha ha
Of course, I laughed inside (how creative!) but D was really offended. I called her mother to let her know and she just sighed this really big sigh.
Mame, I think I must be one of Margaret A's biggest fans! Love just about
everything she's written! Her only novel I was rather luke warmish about was
Oryx & Crake. But everyone is entitled to their own druthers, I say!
I see mean girls in action often, in secondary schools. Quite horrifying to observe them in action, honing in on the latest hapless "victim". So much incredible
power, so misused! I don't think I've ever seen boys (even the very naughty ones! :wink: ) behave in quite this sort of way. Where does this incredible meanness in some girls come from, I wonder?
