Is It Wise to TRUST Our Friends ?

Quote:

trust and cooperation are necessary to a vibrant civil society.
without it, there is backstabbing,

Do u imply that TRUST
will prevent backstabbing ?

Quote:

clientelism,

What 's that ?

Quote:

stealing on a mass scale.

I DOUBT that trust prevents stealing, Dag.

Quote:

there was a popular slogan known to every last soul during communis:
if you don't steal from the state, you steal from your family.
mistrust and fear lead to a deconstruction of society.

Please note that I recommended against TRUST.
I did NOT suggest nor promote fear.

I also recommend against FEAR; it is not your friend.
I am not trustful, but I am very seldom in a state of fear.

Quote:

is it wise to trust? to me, absolutely.
i'd much rather get betrayed a few times than live with mistrust.

what a miserable life that must be.

I have empirical evidence that withholding of trust
does NOT give rise to misery, nor to any discomfort.

Just plan DEFENSIVELY.

David

My dearest friend and I have been together since high school.
That's 37 years.
My second dearest and I, since 1985.
I trust these women with my life. My man.

And all of my digits.
I'm just a lucky so-and-so.

No kidding.

Quote:

Studies show that good friendships/ social networks are the best predictor of individual happiness.

Please note that I did NOT recommend against
having good friendships, nor against social networks.

I merely suggest that ( in service of your personal security ) u don 't TRUST them
( or keep trust to a minimum ). U can still have fun with them ( just watch your back and your wallet ).

eoe wrote:

My dearest friend and I have been together since high school.
That's 37 years.
My second dearest and I, since 1985.
I trust these women with my life. My man.

And all of my digits.
I'm just a lucky so-and-so.

U r saying that u trust them with your fingers ?

OmSigDAVID wrote:

eoe wrote:

My dearest friend and I have been together since high school.
That's 37 years.
My second dearest and I, since 1985.
I trust these women with my life. My man.

And all of my digits.
I'm just a lucky so-and-so.

U r saying that u trust them with your fingers ?

Quote:

yep. funny you should mention fingers.

I was following up.
U said: " And all of my digits. "

Quote:

I was at my second best friend's house a few years ago and I burned a
few fingers on my right hand with steam from a boiling tea kettle.
I could have dropped the kettle in the sink but a pair of beautiful antique wine glasses
we'd used the night before were still in the sink so, I didn't drop it,
taking the pain. She applied cool lavendar and looked me in the eye.
"Next time, drop the damn kettle, okay?"

U r a good friend.
David

Quote:

They were beautiful glasses.

Then I 'm glad that u saved them.

Quote:

By digits I mean numbers, SS#, credit card #'s, security code to my home, etc.

O, I c.

David

Amigo wrote:

It is not wise to trust your friends if they are not trustworthy. But why would you have friends that weren't trustworhty? And why don't they trust you.

It is materialism in decay, at the stage of disregard of right and wrong. It's a natural course. Look at the youth.

U miss the point.

U find out that thay r not trustworthy AFTER thay have betrayed u.

Wud George Washington have given the plans to West Point
to Benedict Arnold if he considered him to be untrustworthy ?

Maybe I shud have named this thread:
" Shud everyone ASSUME that no one is trustworthy ? "

Quote:

Trust is an abstract concept.

Trust is a BELIEF that someone or something will, or will not, act in certain ways.

Quote:

So is friendship. Should the two go together?

NO.
U can trust someone to be HORRIBLE, based upon experience.
U might choose not to have such a trusted person as a friend.

Quote:

I think it can go together based on what third abstract concept one subscribes to.
If one subscribes to mistrust, then the answer is obvious.

It is not obvious.

U can simply keep an open mind as to whether someone
whom u DO or do NOT trust
will stab u in the back, or not; adopt a wait and see attitude.
DON 'T PRE-JUDGE THE OUTCOME.

It is wise to plan defensively, tho.

Quote:

If one subscribes to virtue
in one's beliefs, then one can trust, and accept any disappointments.

Please explain what VIRTUE has to do with trust ?

Quote:

It's all up to each individual I think.

Yes.
Everyone is free to believe whatever he wants.

Quote:

Some societies trust more than others (like the Smurfs; fictional, but it makes a point).

What is their societal philosophy of trust ?

Quote:

Probably those who have been disappointed continually,
in where they placed their trust, have emotional baggage as a consequence.

When I was 11, over half a century ago,
some of my property was stolen by a 13 year old boy
within whose reach I had briefly left it,
against my better judgment.

I then learned that I shud not trust anyone with more than I am willing to lose.
It was a valuable lesson.
Once was enuf for the point to be made.
Since then, I have kept an open mind as whether people
will be honest or not.

Quote:

But then again, some people are totally resilient,
or at least more than many others.

What has RESILIANCE to do with trust ??

The question is whether u learn your lesson
when the facts of human nature reveal themselves in front of u.

Quote:

It's all a personal orientation to one's own life with personal experiences and genetics thrown in.

This has to do with logical analysis of objective facts.
What do genetics have to do with it ?

David

Shud everyone ASSUME that no one is trustworthy

Quote:

Shud everyone ASSUME that no one is trustworthy

To thine ownself be true. Believe in yourself...trust yourself.
All others should be treated as "untrustworthy"...

Miller wrote:

Quote:

Shud everyone ASSUME that no one is trustworthy

To thine ownself be true. Believe in yourself...trust yourself.
All others should be treated as "untrustworthy"...

I don 't trust myself, either, Doctor.

On too many occasions,
I have resolved to do something,
or to remember something, and then I did not.

Q. E. D.

Miller wrote:

Quote:

Shud everyone ASSUME that no one is trustworthy

To thine ownself be true. Believe in yourself...trust yourself.
All others should be treated as "untrustworthy"...

I don 't trust myself, either, Doctor.

On too many occasions,
I have resolved to do something,
or to remember something, and then I did not.

Q. E. D.

................................

It's perfectly normal to not trust yourself. The important thing is to acknowledge this trait and act accordingly.

OmSigDAVID wrote:

Miller wrote:

Quote:

Shud everyone ASSUME that no one is trustworthy

To thine ownself be true. Believe in yourself...trust yourself.
All others should be treated as "untrustworthy"...

I don 't trust myself, either, Doctor.

On too many occasions,
I have resolved to do something,
or to remember something, and then I did not.

Q. E. D.

It's perfectly normal to not trust yourself. The important thing is to acknowledge this trait and act accordingly.

OmSigDAVID wrote:

Miller wrote:

Quote:

Shud everyone ASSUME that no one is trustworthy

To thine ownself be true. Believe in yourself...trust yourself.
All others should be treated as "untrustworthy"...

I don 't trust myself, either, Doctor.

On too many occasions,
I have resolved to do something,
or to remember something, and then I did not.

Q. E. D.

no prob there, prob starts when you got no CLUE who the heck you ARE at any one time,
like some guys here right on this thread !!