Funny Rhymes

1. If you want a little brother,
kick your dad and f**k your mother.

2. Mean people suck, Nice people swallow! !

3. A peach is a peach, A plum is a plum,
A kiss ain't a kiss, without some tounge.
So open up your mouth, and close your eyes,
and give your tounge Some exercise!

4. CONFICIUS SAY: BOY WHO GO TO SLEEP WITH STIFF PROBLEM WAKE UP WITH SOLUTION IN HAND.

5. Love is a name, Sex is a game. Forget the name and play the game!

6. Sex is good, sex is fine,
doggy style or 69,
just for fun or getting paid
everyone loves getting laid.

7. A guy walks up to a girl and says: Wanna play magic? She asks: What do you mean? He says: We go to my place, have sex and than you disappear!

8. Roses are red, Pickles are green.
I love your legs and whats in between.

9. Sex is like NOKIA (connecting people) like NIKE (just do it) like PEPSI (ask for more) like SAMSUNG (everyone is invited) and like ME (TOO GOOD TO BE TRUE)..

10. I love you in blue. I love you in red
but most of all. I love you in bed.

11. Sex is a sensation.
It's about a man's temptation,
putting his location in a woman's destination.
Do you understand the explanation
or do you need a demonstration?

12. Sex is like pizza. When its good, its VERY GOOD. When its bad, its Still pretty good

13. Sorry, the f**kmachine is out of order,
so f**k yourself and save a quarter.

14. F**k is good. F**k is funny.
Lots of people. F**k for money.
If you think that. F**k is funny.
F**k yourself and save your money!

15. Sex is like MathS, Add the Bed, Subtract the Clothes, Divide the Legs and Multiply!

16. Peter, Peter, Pumpkin eater,
had a wife & liked to beat her,
smacked her twice around da head,
F**ked her arse & went 2 bed!

17.Q)what do u get with nuts on ur wall? A)walnuts
Q)what do u get with nuts on ur chest? A)chestnuts
Q)what do u get with nuts on ur chin? A)a mouth full of cock!

18.Is it whiskey that makes u frisky?
Is it the brandy that makes u randy?
Is it the gin that makes u slip-in?
Is it rum that makes u cum?

19. When boys say i luv u, U beleve its true,
9 months later he says to hell with you,
The baby is a bastard, the mother a whore,
None of this would have happened if the rubber hadnt tore!

20.It's a hard life being a penis, you have a head with no brain, one eye that's blind, 2 neighbours that are nuts, the others an arsehole & your best mates a c*nt

22.sex drugs rock & roll,
speed weed & birth control,
life's a bitch & then u die,
so f**k the world & lets get high!

23. if the sea was vodka and i was a duck
id sink to the bottom and drink my way up
but the sea isnt vodka and im not a duck
so reply to this message if you fancie a ****

24. Old King Cole had a very big hole,
A very big hole had He,
He sat on the rock & cut his cock,
And dipped his balls in the sea

A good friend is like a good bra... hard 2 find, comfortable, supportive, prevents you from falling, holds you tight, and is always close 2 ur heart!

Tell me.is it going in?..yeah ..is it hurting?..ooh yeah ..ouch its hurtin ..ok i wil put it in slowly ..stil hurtin..ahh yeh ..den lets try d other shoe madam