Please Help Me I Wanna Find My Dad But I Don't Know Where To Start???

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I want to find out who my dad is. But my mom don't know because he raped her and thats how i came into this world. But no one knows who he is and i want to find out why my dad raped my mom and i want to know a lot of other stuff.

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Type: Question • Score: 5 • Views: 2,541 • Replies: 22
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@shelbydancy,

Then you'll need access to any police records.

2 Replies

@jespah,

That's if he was ever picked up by the police for this crime. It may just be a closed file.

It may be worth talking to someone with a view to whether it would be feasible for the police to check your dna with their dna database, just in case there is a match on someone who has been arrested for something else.
I'm not an expert on dna, but it seems there have been massive advances over the years which have resulted in quite a few "cold" cases being cleared up because of new dna matching techniques.

I could be wrong....

1 Reply

@Lordyaswas,

okay thank yall

0 Replies

@jespah,

i dont think she reported it though

1 Reply

@shelbydancy,

Then I think your only real hope is to try Lordy's suggestion. I'm sorry it's not much more than that.

I do hope you've had responsible, loving men in your life, whether there's been a stepfather or a brother or half-brother, or a trusted advisor, teacher, mentor, clergyman or friend. Even without a biological father, in a lot of ways, you can call men like that your 'fathers', and I bet they'd be thrilled if you told them that you thought of them in that way.

1 Reply

@shelbydancy,

Be careful of what you wish for. Your father might not be a very nice man and very unhappy to meet the living proof of his crime.
Sometimes "closure" is vastly overrated.
Be sensitive to your mother's feelings. She bore you and raised you despite the circumstances. Her feelings could be hurt in this matter.

1 Reply

@panzade,

well my mom was not the best she beat me night and day said it all was my fault. i got put in foster care. but i want to know who he is so i can know if there is something that runs in his family that i could get sick from later on down the road.

0 Replies

@jespah,

my granndpa has been a father to me and my mom beat me so she wasnt there either got put in a foster home and my grandma was my mom.

1 Reply

@shelbydancy,

I hope you've been able to tell your grandparents how much they mean to you.

2 Replies

@jespah,

I have i tell them every second i get because i still live with them.

0 Replies

@jespah,

i still live with them because they are getting old and i take care of them while my fiancé lives in Georgia.

0 Replies

You're a good kid. Smile

2 Replies

@jespah,

thank you i try my best even though what i went through. i even take care of my mom even though she treated me like dirt.

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@jespah,

Quote:

You're a good kid.

I was thinking the same.
Sometimes bad things happen to good people...
You're doing good shelby....especially the part about forgiving your mother.

1 Reply

@panzade,

thank u

1 Reply

@shelbydancy,

ditto

To expand, I think you are one sensitive and smart person.

On finding father, I'm no expert.

1 Reply

@shelbydancy,

I was speechless for a moment there. Does your mom know him personally? You can get identity details from her if she's comfortable speaking about it. Or if she's victim then it would be pretty hard

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1 Reply

@marykittredge,

she is the victim

0 Replies

@ossobuco,

Thank You Very Much. I try to be as strong as i can and hang in there the best i can because if all the stuff i went through and it is hard as crap though!

1 Reply

Please Help Me I Wanna Find My Dad But I Don't Know Where To Start???

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