How do you let go?

Take the time to read what you've written as if it were written by someone else. What advice would you give this stranger? Remove yourself from the situation and you will clearly see that you've been being used for a very, very long time.

Here, I'll break it up for you --

I have no idea where to begin this, but I can tell you where it ended.

In 2002 I met a woman who was able to do something most women weren't able to, and that was get the attention of my heart. As in every new relationship we were very much attached at the hip.

After just about 3 months I had moved in with her. We both were attending the same college at the time and the location of her place was perfect being I was there almost every night, hence the reason I moved in. We had our ups and downs throughout the years that followed as does every relationship.

In the Summer of 2004 I had asked her to marry me, and with a giant grin and tears flowing down her face she kissed me. She never said yes or no she just kissed me.

Near October of that year we were having issues and took time apart. During then she decided she was joining the NAVY, and she did. I wrote to her every day that she was gone in boot camp afterwards I didn't hear from her for awhile.

In the Spring of 2005 she contacted me to see how I was doing and told me that she had got married to the guy that she was with before me and that she was now stationed in California. By the Summer he had left her.

I saw her again for the first time in forever During Christmas of 2005 and it was like we were never apart. And I left my native state of Michigan and moved out to California to be with her in the Spring of 2006. Everything was going great, we were living together again. We had an argument during New Years Eve, and on January 16th I had flown back home to Detroit for business.

On January 17th when I returned back to our home it was empty, she left. Not even a note. A few days later I got a phone call from her stating she just needed to get through the NAVY on her own. Since then I have flown back and forth over 20 times.

I can't feel it anymore where home is. I guess what felt like home for the past 5 years was being with her. I've tried dating other women since, but I can't seem to find the one that I know will replace her. So I guess the question I have for whoever takes the time to read this is, how do I let it go?

Hi Mac,
First off you know that this is not going to be an easy thing to do, but, you will do this and you'll be OK. I don't think it's a matter of finding someone to replace her but a matter of getting over this pain on you're own so you can be open to someone else with an open heart.
Take this opportunity to start fresh and rediscover yourself. What are the things you enjoy doing. How about taking up something new, like cycling or hiking. Alot of cities have bike clubs and such and while you're learning to love something new you can meet others who are like you.
I know that you're hurting right now but I'm sure you've heard this before---It will get easier. Hang in there!

do what i did, realise the pain u go thru after a break up is just withdrawls from an addiction.

But then it takes all the fun out of it once you realise that "love" is just a chemical in your brain

stupid science, ignorance REALLY is bliss!

Mac--



You don't need to replace this woman--unless you like being a convenient foil for games-playing. You need to develop a sense of self so that you can be at home anywhere in the world.

For starters, pick a hobby or an interest that has absolutely nothing to do with the Navy Babe: card towers, mud wrestling, researching your family tree, picking up litter on the highway... Whatever your new interest devote at least six hours a week to it. Try to find other people who share your hobby. Stop thinking of yourself as a wounded, drifting lover and decide you are a fascinating man with many interests.

Good luck.