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Wed 9 May, 2007 07:51 am
Scientists Discover Heaviest Element Ever
A major research institution has just announced the discovery of the
densest
element yet known to science. The new element has been named "Bushcronium."
Bushcronium has one neutron, 12 assistant neutrons, 75 deputy neutrons and
224
assistant deputy neutrons, giving it an atomic mass of 311.
These particles are held together by dark forces called morons, which are
surrounded by vast quantities of lepton-like particles called peons.
The symbol for Bushcronium is "w." Bushcronium's mass actually increases
over
time, as morons randomly interact with various elements in the atmosphere
and
become assistant deputy neutrons in a bushcronium molecule, forming
isodopes.
This characteristic of moron-promotion leads some scientists to believe that
bushcronium is formed when morons reach a certain quantity in concentration.
This hypothetical quantity is referred to as "critical morass." When
catalyzed
with money, bushcronium activates foxnewsium, an element that radiates
orders of
magnitude and more energy, albeit as incoherent noise. Foxnewsium has 1/2 as
many peons but twice as many morons.
I'll confirm this finding, W is the most dense element in the known world. It's also been proven that if you mix this stuff with oil, many American soldiers will die.