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Thu 8 Mar, 2007 09:20 am
Am applying to a job, which is important to me, in one of the Qs they asked for description of my previous jobs, so I had ones a training in one of the banks, I wrote the following:
I had trained willingly or voluntarily in the Bank, the training was a part of a program through the university, and the training covered all the or (the entire) departments in the bank, and particularly the foreign exchange department, and I did all the work that the employees is usually working on, or (and I carried out all the work that is done by the bank employees normally)
and I comprehend all of what must be done or (and I Absorbed most of the work done by the employees ),
and I excelled my job and succeeded in dealing with customers and colleagues, and that is by testimony of the employee of the bank, or (and I Mastered my job and able to success in dealing with employees and customers, according to bank employees)
In this short period of working in the bank I earned a good experience, or (I believe I gained good experience despite the fact that the training period in the bank was short)
Am sure there are many mistakes, can u help me in this, plz.
thank u very much.
I enthusiastically underwent training in the Bank as part of a university work experience scheme. The training, though short, gave experience in all departments in the bank. I had specific involvement in the foreign exchange department, where I was engaged in the same work as any normal employee thereby gaining comprehensive knowledge of all aspects of that particular job. The bank has kindly complimented me on my successful dealings with staff and customers and will provide testimony to that effect. MINOR EDIT.
great
Fresco.............I read your reply, how do you write in such an expressive, concise and rich way???
My writing skills in English are also not good............in fact I do have so many ideas when something is asked to write down on a familiar topic but I can not write with good vocabulary. And I know that my way of writing is also not expressive and attention- grabbing. Please can you give me any good suggestion to improve my vocabulary and to be a good writer in all aspects of writing in English?
cdieoxide
Thank you for your generous words !
I'm afraid there's no quick fix ! You should note that I was born in England and received a British "Grammar School" education.
From what I remember of my schooling, both vocabulary and style tend to come from reading "good literature" and then imitating usage in your own writing. (Dickens and Conan Doyle are examples which spring to mind here.) Exercises in conjoining sentences may also be useful and these can be found in most English course books from age 10 upwards. Knowledge of a full range of conjunctions would assist such exercises. (e,g,...however, nevertheless,thereby, whereas, in so doing, etc etc). Actively keeping a personal "vocabulary book" in which you note down interesting words or phrases may also be of benefit provided you make a conscious effort to use it (like a bank account) in conjunction with your own writing.
I hope these points are useful to you..
Thankyou very much Fresco for such a nice guidance.........I will start from today to follow your suggestions and I am hopeful that it will help me a lot.
As you have told that you are a British with 'grammar school' education and also after reading your 'classic' way of writing, I want to ask your permission that if you have some free time, would it be possible for you to check my English writing (which I will post here day to day, but promise to not disturb you much), correct it and tell me my short comings? Please, say yes only in case if you really have enough time to read my posts and correcting them. Otherwise, it is ok.
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