my father-in-law thinks he's dying

Of course he is. Go with it.

Re: my father-in-law thinks he's dying


I had an aunt like that. Ignore him, or, if you feel you must respond, tell him to give the timeshare to your brother-in-law, cousin, whoever (someone appropriate -- I used to mention my cousin J__ as she was my aunt's favorite anyway). And then change the subject.

Sounds like he's going through a realization crisis. Yes, he is dying. We all are. But, his sense of humor indicates he may be having a rough time with this sudden realization. He's being bitter to attempt to deal with it.

Is he trying to alienate, push people away? I don't know. Maybe he has always been bitter?

As Jespah said, ignore him and move the conversation to something else. Avoid rewarding the inappropriate behavior, especially when he's mentioning what he will give to a grandkid - not something kids should be in the middle of or have to worry about. It's putting him in a spot.

cchubbins- Welcome to A2K!

Oh puhleez! My mom had been dying since I knew her. She passed away in January, at the age of 97!

It sounds like your FIL is quite a manipulator. I agree with those who advise changing the subject. The more reaction that he gets, the more he will persist with this behavior.

I am not an attorney (Jes, help!) but it seems to me that a person does not have to accept an inheritance, if he does not want it.

My grandmother starting obsessing about her imminent death about 15 years (or more) before she died. She would call and say the end had come. At first we all panicked at these calls. My mother would often run right over. We eventually found them just annoying. I eventually found them run-of-the-mill. She once called to tell me that she had only minutes to live and that she had hidden some money in a tissue box. My response, "Which one?"

I suspect that age can make us focus on such things. Or loneliness. Or any combination of factors. Not easy to listen to, especially for kids.

If you're concerned about the time-share, you can do some investigating to find out whether they're legit. Or maybe you need to look into only the one your father-in-law has. You probably have time.

You could just buy him a hunting vacation with Dick Cheney.

Offer to keep his ashes at the timeshare.

That way you can guarantee to visit him once a year after he is dead.

Roberta- My mom was particularly histrionic. One day she told me that she wanted to die. I looked her straight in the eye, and said,

"Whatever turns you on".

It was as if I had flipped a light switch. Her mood immediately changed, and she was fine after that.......................for the moment!

As for timeshares being a scam; They are considered a scam when you first buy it because you are paying a lot of money to be able to stay at a place one week a year. Your in-laws already bought it. If they paid for it already, its not a bad deal at all depending on where the timeshare is. If they still owe a lot of money on it, there is no reason for you to assume the debt. The estate should pay for it or you can let the estate default on it.

One of the big things with timeshares is timeshare trading. It can be boring going to the same vacation spot every year so people trade the week in their timeshare to someone else in a different location.

Here is some info from BBB on timeshares. It may answer a lot of your questions.

http://www.bbbsilicon.org/topic163.html

I wondered if the question related to the value of timeshares too, parados. I've had one for over twenty-five years and have never stepped foot inside the place. I've used it to travel all over the US, Mexico, and the Caribbean and stay in a two-bedroom condo on the beach in most years.

First, the coroner must pronounce your f-i-l officially dead.

Then you hold the funeral.

Then you worry about the timeshare.

From your description your f-i-l is not terribly consistant in his bequests. You may be borrowing trouble unnecessarily.

Timeshares BAD!
You definitely do not want that thing. That's why fil think's he's so funny. He's not. I inherited a timeshare from my uncle and he probably meant well because it was pretty cool at first. But after a while, it got like a girlfriend I just didn't want to see anymore. I hired an agency to sell the thing, but they sucked. I finally came across this company called Timeshare Relief. Like the agent, i had to pay them, but what I paid ended up being less than if I kept the timeshare for two more years trying to sell it with an agency. The whole timeshare ordeal was a major hassle, but once those guys took it off my hands it was over.

Yes, you can disclaim an inheritance: http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Disclaimer_of_interest