help

Re: help


Sounds like she wants to
see the city
go shopping
and have dinner.

Period.

If it turns into sex, so be it, but if I were you, I wouldn't go into this assuming or expecting that. It sounds to me like she wants a tour guide and not a date.

So, take her to some place in your city that's unique and interesting, like a museum, park, zoo, monument or the like. Then take her shopping. Then take her to dinner at some place you like that isn't too formal but not too informal. She's more or less given you all of the information you need in terms of planning the day. If you have any questions about specifics (e. g. would she prefer to see a famous fountain instead of go to the old section of the city or whatever the tourist attractions are where you live), why not call her and ask?

If I were entertaining someone from out of town who asked for these kinds of things (assuming I wasn't married and this was some man who I had known and maybe even had dated at one point), I would take him to the Gardener Museum (or Fenway Park or the Public Garden, depending on weather and whatever he preferred to do), then to Downtown Crossing for shopping, and then to dinner at some casual but not too casual place like, I dunno, Border Café in Cambridge. I wouldn't take him to a movie; he can do that at home and that's not what he, my guest, said he wanted to do. I would not expect sex or a rekindling of the relationship.

A little patience and you could, in the long term, have a friend that might some day turn into a sex partner. On the other hand you could try and force the sex issue and end up losing that friend. There is a saying having to do with waiting for the slow dime rather than the fast nickel.

As for worrying what to talk about, it would seem you've done an adequate enough job in the past for her to want to be in your company again so I'd say just relax, be yourself and have a good time.

[quote="As for worrying what to talk about, it would seem you've done an adequate enough job in the past .[/quote]

Yes this is the problem, that I did an adequate enough job in the past for her , and she also did the same even more than me.

Maybe the first step to sharing the ultimate contact is jusy having fun out on the town first. Were you a good outonthetowner ???

Why not get to know this woman before you attempt to sexually engage her?

By the way...I noticed you used the term "girl". How old is this "girl"? If you're in the US, age could be very,very important if you're thinking along the sex route.

Of course you should hit on her! Don't take her to a movie...you can't talk/flirt with her. Don't listen to "become friends with her first" advice...sounds like you're looking for more than a friend, and in the real world opposed to romance novels, once you're in the "friendship" zone with a girl, it's almost impossible to get out. I can't give you any topics to talk about, but just be casual, flirty, and good luck closing the deal.

The Doo Hoo makes a good point of falling into the dreaded friend zone but the reality is not every woman you want shag is going to fall under your spell... it's a tricky call to make but the long view helps; do you want to know her if you can't have sex with her.