The Art of the Dinner Party

Bookmarking. I've thrown a good party or two, but all were small groups of people that I didn't need to impress but just wanted to feed and water. I've got a sister that's pretty good at this kind of thing though. I'll ask her.

I attended a party on Saturday that had a great spread. Roast lamb (not hard to prepare) with roasted new potatoes, green beans with almonds in a buttery sauce, and baby carrots. There was also a baked ham, ordered from someplace, that requires almost no preparation and was absolutely delicious. The best I ever had. I can find out where my friend got it if you're interested.

None of this is hard to prepare, and there's little ahead of time work involved. Over twenty people were served.

For dessert, there was a carrot cake, a meringuey creamy pie thing with fresh raspberries and kiwi slices. The entire pie was made and assembled while we were there.

BTW, for canapes, in addition to the crudite, there were figs filled with cheese and wrapped in bacon. Positively delicious. I could probably hunt down the recipe if you're interested.

Definitely interested in the ham! Fig recipe would be nice, too, but neither are necessary, only if it's information that's easy to obtain.

Missed your post until now, Noddy. I know what you mean. Part of it is just my perfectionist side which could stand to be purposely denied now and then. A larger part of it though is a sense of parity/ fairness -- I just have such a hard time going to someone's house and having these wonderful, home-made meals that took time and energy and which are obviously a source of pride for the cooks, and then turn around and serve bubkes when they come here.

Here's the link to the ham place. This ham was moist, tender, and not too salty. It was supoib. http://www.honeybaked.com/

The figs weren't figs. They were dates filled with parmigiano reggiano cheese. The dates were wrapped in bacon, held together with toothpicks, and roasted for about 10 minutes in a 350 degree oven. I think the stuffing, rolling, and toothpicking could be done ahead of time. These were delicious. My friend couldn't keep 'em coming fast enough.

Serviceable, outdoor gas grills can be had for less than $100 at Home Depot.

There are twice-baked potatoes in the freezer section that are really good.

For that matter, do you have an upscale grocery store that sells prepared dishes?

Tortilla roll-ups are easy to make ahead, and store in the fridge prior to serving.

Hollow out half of a watermelon and use it to serve fruit salad. http://www.fabulousfoods.com/recipes/salads/fruit/melonbasket.html

Ham with jezebel sauce. http://www.foodnetwork.com/food/recipes/recipe/0,1977,FOOD_9936_22027,00.html




That jambalaya looks great. I've added it to my recipe links....

I'm interested in a lot of things mentioned here. Dlowan's choices come closest to my own personal ones, except that I also like italian, as everyone within earshot knows. (I know, I know, I mentioned all those old fashioned recipes but ne'er mind.). Going to look at that Jambalaya recipe, going to try the polenta gorgonzola thing for sure. The vietnamese cold roll thing is good; I agree on getting people moving around and participating, if they're not all sticks and maybe expecially if they are.

With friends who I can always make a snack for if they hate the meal I'll do stuff like a long cooked old fashioned polenta with different types of sauce - mushroom, or bolognese, say, or some kind of risotto - but if someone doesn't like or won't eat rice or polenta you're out of luck unless you have lots of other stuff too - and with risotto and freshly cooked long stirred polenta that puts you in the kitchen possibly anxious you'll screw something up. Even this fearless wonder would probably only do that with a max of six people.

Dadpad, I didn't see how much meat in your burger recipe... maybe my brain removed the meat.

Now I'm getting hungry and I've just come from a delicious lunch..

Aaaaaack! The book by Paul Bocuse that I put in my ex's stack since it was really his, I think it was a birthday gift - the book with the scalloped potato recipe - turns out to be for sale on amazon for $161., used. Bocuse is one of the godfathers of nouvelle cuisine...

Plus, I can't find the recipe online. Well, I'll ask x-hub if I remember when I talk with him - hope he hasn't tossed the book. In the meantime, I bet there are scads of good scalloped potato recipes out there.

Scalloped potatoes! I made them for Christmas dinner and they were a huge hit. Definitely something in the "ok I'm making that again" file. Used a Better Homes and Gardens recipe, humble but it seemed to work.

That was one where I finally started to feel like I was getting things. I was making the sauce and it was time to add milk but I had to get the milk out of the fridge and get the lid off and meanwhile it kept cooking and I was worried that it was starting to burn so rather than taking the extra time to search out a measuring cup I just swilled some milk in there. Then since I didn't know how much I swilled, measuring after that was pointless, so I kept swilling 'til it seemed about right.

That's extremely unusual for me.

AND it worked!

OK, I can do this, I can do this (whaps self about the head, motivation-style...)

The Bocuse recipe is very simple, though a tad tedious, in that the potatoes (waxy/reds if I remember right) are sliced very thin, almost like potato chips, and this can be boring, though you can do it, natch, ahead of time. Each thin slice drops into what I remember as simmering milk, getting fully coated, and then cooked in that milk in a (hmmm, 9" x 13" baking dish(?) until the top is crispy...

In my search for the recipe online I saw all sorts of folks have recipes for them, including Paul Prudhomme. Bet that one is different from the pristine Bocuse's.

You could actually go back to page 4 and have another look at the recipie.
...or not

750grams premium mince steak (apprx 1.5lb).

This one was that you sliced the potatoes very thin (I did this while processing some very disturbing news [an acquaintance had to deal with SIDS on Christmas day] and kept almost chopping off my fingers and having to step back and get a grip), then separately made a sauce (onions, butter, flour, milk) and then layered the onions and sauce and popped the whole thing in the oven.

I'm at the far end of the let's swill and see how it goes spectrum. I couldn't really participate in Flush'd's soup thread, as I don't ever make soup the same way twice. With entirely new things, I follow a recipe the first time.
When I played around with chinese cooking, I always obeyed the recipes. Well, some of them I didn't do a second time, like shui mai. I never made tamales a second time either. What a dreadful tamale maker I am!

Do you have Julia Child's French cooking books? I suppose they cost an arm and a leg now too. I forget their titles and they're still among my packed stuff. I like her and Marcella Hazan (ital cooking) for really telling you how to do something. As in, here, DO THIS.

Soz,
I throw at least one dinner party a month. Last month, I had three parties (I know, I am nuts). I always use lists: who is coming, what time I told them to get here (heh... that's another story) and what exactly I am serving. It comes in handy when my brain has quit functioning and Mr. Piffka asks me a question, like what is the name of somebody's wife. I post the complete menu in the kitchen so he can see it and I can refer to it.

I loved one of my most recent dinner parties... the one at the beginning of December. It was for 14 people and I served it buffet style. I made four kinds of soups and each one had special accompaniments. I'd never done that before, but I will again. Soups are naturals for preparing ahead of time and are light enough that people don't feel they've over-indulged. People raved about the soups... and of course, they all decided they wanted the same soup -- the wine-y French onion with jarlsberg melted on the sourdough croutons, but there was some hearty chili and a vegetarian squash soup, too. We had a fabulous dessert -- chocolate. What a great and fun party that was...and easy. The only thing is, you need a lot of soup bowls.

I read that you worried about your guests' various food peccadillos. In my opinion, better to forget all that. Who won't eat what changes and do you really need to keep track? No. As long as there is bread and butter and dessert, nobody is going to starve.

For me, there are five controls for a dinner party:

1 -- The food
2 -- The table
3 -- The house
4 -- The guests
5 -- The hostess

It is good for the house to be as neat (and clean) as possible. Most of that can be done a couple of days ahead. On the day of the party, I vacuum up the dog hair and figure if I have fresh towels and flowers by the sink in the bathroom and flowers somewhere in the living room, I'm done. Nobody needs to check your bedroom or office for a mess... just make sure the public rooms are clear and that the front entry looks reasonably good.

The table, I've found, is really important. It sets (haha) the mood and lets the guests know that dinner will be served. Also, if you suddenly realize you need to wash the white napkins, you've got the time to do it. I try to put our the serving pieces and set the table as early in the day as possible and always look for something interesting. I think large flower arrangements are awful on the table; I never use them. If you need to put out flowers (I don't), then have them in very small vases. I figure the food and the lighting will make the table look good. In December, I found crystals in various shapes and scattered them about. They were very cool to look at, caught the light of the candles and were fun for the guests to play with. Also, they were cheap -- I think $5 for a box at TJ Maxx. I've also used leaves and even rocks & shells. Candles or little oil lamps (from a restaurant supply store) are super, but make sure that the candles don't melt too fast or you might have a mess. I often set one extra place, too. It is so much easier to remove it then to search out the plates, forks, etc. at the last minute for a surprise extra guest.

The food... everybody talks about the food but if you screw it up, it is not the end of the world. Make sure that you've done at least one amazing home-made thing (like a mustard souffle with that great ham) and that you've got some good wine. Always serve the best wine first, while everyone's palate is fresh and have a fall-back tray. Mine is often a festive serving tray with dried fruit and nuts. I can pull that out at the beginning (with cheese & crackers) or at the end of a meal (with little cookies). It is quick, looks good, can be done in advance so all I have to do is take it out of the cupboard. Of course, never do the dishes while the guests are in the house... it is okay to put away food that will obviously go bad, but otherwise, try to pretend you've got a maid coming. And never ever apologize for anything, even if the meat is tough and the mashed potatoes lumpy.

Since you want to give the right impression of calm and serenity, it is important, I think, to give yourself at least one hour prior to dinner where you can get yourself gorgeous. Just stop doing everything, drop it in your husband's lap if need be, and have a nice long bath... do your hair & get dressed. Feel like you're going to a party (you're no longer the slattern in the kitchen). You'll be happier and your guests will think you're marvelous. Be ready to greet them while looking gorgeous (maybe with a cute apron on if you'll need it), sipping that good wine and with a big smile on your face. All will be well and if not, it is the stuff of good stories for later.

That brings me to the last... the guests. Why are you inviting whoever it is you're inviting? Hopefully, because you want to welcome them into your home and you'd like to get to know them better. Once you've got a group of friendly dinner guests, you've got to encourage them by maintaining a fairly regular round of invitations. You'll find that some people are absolute duds -- they pick fights or won't talk to new people. Avoid inviting them except when absolutely necessary. When people get used to coming to your house, you'll find that someone just naturally is handy at opening wine and seems to like it... let him do that. You'll find that one of your girlfriends is great at helping you serve... let her. There is nothing that feels more welcoming than being able to go to a friend's house and helping out... knowing which cupboard has the glasses... which drawer has the spoons.

Blind as a bat I am, dadpad, though in my own defence it only said mince....
(yeah, I see now it said 1.5 lb)

Sorry.. and, besides, I figured it out, more or less, even not seeing that.
Sounds good..

Great post, piffka.




















<I've grown to like lumpy mashed potatoes>

Ooh, that's a goldmine, Piffka!

Communication is definitely a big part of this because I recognize a lot of what you say in Deaf gatherings I've hosted. I used to be part of a book club for Deaf women (just started a new one!) where I would regularly host a large group -- not dinner but still dessert + coffee + tea type stuff -- and the anxiety level was just so different.

As I get to know these people better and better it will be less of an issue -- one of those things where if I want to get to point Z I have to get through points A through Y first, and while they might be unpleasant point Z is worth it.

Errrrr.... I should mention that "the best-laid plans of mice and (wo)men" often fall apart. Someone plows through the mousie's home or the table is upset. I've had all sorts of the most amazing screw-ups. After a while, you just have to laugh off all the anxiety. As long as your sense of humor is firmly in place, this will quickly feel comfortable to you.

Love those lists though... between Mr.Piffka asking me what seems like dumb questions about the food and my memory for names being horrible... my crib sheet has helped me keep sane.

To dadpad - Silly, of course I looked at page four and more than once to see if I could see meat listed in the ingredients. I may be stupid, but I'm stupid in ways you couldn't guess at, like rereading and still not seeing it.

As we say here osso. She'll be right.

Soz; Big flower arrangements on the table (and other tall objects) really annoy me as they get in my line of sight, limiting or making communication with other guests difficult.

But i do like flowers so a small bowl about an inch deep can be used to float a stem pruned camelia, rose,or similar. Cut the stem at the top so you just have the flower portion. Similar with candles. proprtion of flower to bowl is imprtant aesthetically.