Being the "unpredictable" man

Reply Fri 24 Nov, 2006 03:27 pm
Hello all;

How can I be an "unpredictable" guy? this is something that would really attract the girl and keep her "on her toes", which makes her more attracted and more interested and more excited with the guy..

What are some of the tips, hints, moves, behaviors that an average guy would do to make him "unpredictable" ?

ex: having a different mood each day?
having surprises all the time?
having an attitude every hour?

or what exactly?

Waiting for your thoughts everyone!
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Reply Fri 24 Nov, 2006 03:36 pm
Look Johnny, if you need an unpredictability factor to attract a girl,
then you'll get what you deserve.

However, if you aspire to engage in a honest, loving relationship,
I suggest you be honest to yourself and your potential girlfriend.
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Reply Fri 24 Nov, 2006 04:09 pm
Any woman with any sense avoids unpredictable men.

They tend to be self-centered and inconsiderate.
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Reply Fri 24 Nov, 2006 04:15 pm
The next time she introduces you to one of her female friends, grab them by the face and just start madly sucking face with them. With her male friends, do the same thing.

Yeah, that should do it.
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Reply Fri 24 Nov, 2006 04:20 pm
Be attentive!
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Reply Sat 25 Nov, 2006 07:30 am
so ur telling me that being unpredictable is not attractive?
i wonder why a lot of females think it really is attractive.

or probably it should be worded as being "full of surprises" or perhaps MYSTERIOUS?

is that the word?
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Reply Sat 25 Nov, 2006 09:45 am
I think the idea you are looking for is (and it doesn't come in one neat little word, sorry) not being obvious. And there's nothing wrong with that. You need not share every detail and nuance of your life with everyone. You're entitled to have a private life. It's the playing games and/or not being yourself in order to somehow attract some mythical class of women that is troubling. Most assuredly, once you attract a woman, you're going to want her to care for you as a real person, not as some chimera. But instead you are setting yourself up for a situation where your behaviour would, essentially, be a lie. Acting one way, pretending another and pretty soon you've built up a persona that isn't you. Do you want to be cared for, for who you really are, or for some fake myth that you have created about yourself?

If you went around claiming to be, I dunno, wealthy, but it turned out you weren't, well, yes, perhaps it would be some shallowness on a woman's part if she were suddenly no longer attracted to you, but, not so fast. The whole thing would have been based on a lie. Essentially, you'd deserve to be dumped. Or substitute any number of positive qualities. Let's say you met someone online and showed them a picture of your friend because you figured she'd be more attracted to him. Once you met in person, she'd be understandably disappointed and angry. Or let's say you claimed to love children, but you don't, or you claimed to be well-educated, but you aren't. See where I'm going with this? And, don't you think that you would be disappointed and angry if you felt a woman was lying to you about her own qualities and characteristics?

Some women may be attracted to guys who are unpredictable. But you don't need that kind of dramatic crap in your life. Take this from people who have been through that before. It's exhausting and damaging and, on balance, it doesn't do anyone any good. It may seem exciting on the outside, but on the inside, a couple who are fighting all the time are miserable, not on the edge of sexual tension.

You want to say you're going to the movies, and then go to the park instead? That might be a nice surprise or it might just look like you back out of your promises. Again, I have said this before, you continually seem to treat women like an exotic species and also, I might add, like a monolith who can all be impressed by the same things. Well, if I just wear the blue shoelaces, you seem to be saying, all of the women will fall at your feet. Well, it doesn't work like that. And all of the wishing and hoping and posturing in the world will never make that work.
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Reply Sat 25 Nov, 2006 10:21 am
Wise words from Jespah. The mature, stable woman does not want a man who is a will o' the wisp. They want a sensible, reliable person to whom they can give their trust. That is not to say that a man has to be staid, stuffy and stodgy. A good man will indulge in some excitement, and pull some surprises once in awhile. But that will be for the pleasure of the woman he is with, and not calculated to deceive.

Sure there are some women who like teetering on the edge. There are also some who like to be whipped. But if you want a stable person, and not a dingbat, just be yourself.
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Reply Sat 25 Nov, 2006 10:37 am
vonderjohn wrote:

i wonder why a lot of females think it really is attractive.

I think it is an odd class of woman who likes that quality.

Usually ones looking for a quick sexual relationship only.
Since a man who is unpredictable requires alot of attention ( in my experience only) it is triesome after a while.
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Reply Sat 25 Nov, 2006 10:50 am
jespah wrote:
...Again, I have said this before, you continually seem to treat women like an exotic species and also, I might add, like a monolith who can all be impressed by the same things...

In the Middle East (he doesn't say exactly where?), women are frequently treated like an exotic species by our standards, jes. Perhaps vonderjohn is just reflecting that culture.
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Reply Sat 25 Nov, 2006 11:23 am
I still say my idea is the best one on this thread.

Carry on.
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Reply Mon 27 Nov, 2006 02:06 am
IMHO, most women won't think you're an unpredictable, wild, crazy kind of guy - they'll think you're insane with a personality disorder. I'm with Jespah on this one - be consistent in your behaviour and women will warm to you for being yourself.

If you want to surprise them with spontaneity in the form of surprises, then do it on a small scale. Try an unexpectedly nice compliment about how lovely she looks, the colour of her eyes, or a small gift of flowers or something meaningful. But most of all, be honest in your spontaneity. Gals can spot a fake a million miles away.

Good luck Smile

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Reply Mon 27 Nov, 2006 05:34 am
Cannot imagine that a relationship with a guy that has to play silly games like that will last too long!
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